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The Evil Within
by Jeremy Moore (karloff2010@gmail.com)

Rated: R   Genre: Horror   User Review: **
This is the story of three people brought into a world they didn't realize existed. A world where Vampires are not the bad guys but instead try to redeem themselves in the eyes of god by helping humanity against demons and greater evil that humans cannot comprehend.


This screenplay is copyrighted to its author. All rights reserved. This screenplay may not be used or reproduced without the express written permission of the author.



THE EVIL WITHIN

FADE IN:

EXT. FREEWAY - NIGHT
                                                            
Scene opens with a car chase down a freeway. The
surroundings are that of downtown Minneapolis traveling on
I94 as two blue Chevy suburbans are chasing a small red
porche 920. The porche turns down a small alley and comes to
a dead end wall the scene focuses back on the large SUV’s as
they trap the vehicle six men unload from each SUV and
surround the car. As they open the door with guns at the
ready; No one is in the car. The scene pans over the wall
and down a secondary alley. Showing just papers flying about
the alley as if something Had moved through there at a very
fast speed.
                                                            
                       KARLOFF (VO)
In the many years i have lived.
Not one human has shown me a
reason to want to help them. But
this is our goal. Humans tend to
hunt what they fear even if what
they fear does more good then
harm. In my opinion Humanity is
doomed.
                                                            
 
EXT. ALLEY - NIGHT
                                                            
Scene Opens with a wide shot of a movie theatre, the movie
sign reads “Orange Shoes”. The movie lets out with a group
of people leaving the theatre; three people two men and a
woman are going down an alley. It is evening and it starts
to rain as a nasty storm approaches.

A shadow moves quickly across the alley wall.
                                                            
                       PERRY
      (Covering himself
       with his coat)
C’mon you two, it’s going to rain.
I don’t want to get wet. I am kind
of like a cat in that regard.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Sarcastic Tone)
Oh great, Mr. Whiney thinks he
might melt. Are you sure you
haven’t seen the wizard of oz too
            (MORE)

2.

                       GERALD (cont'd)
many times?
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (Slight pause)
Now Gerald that wasn’t nice, he
may whine but he’s my little
whiner.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Smiling)
Yeah, Yeah, ok…
                                                            
                       PERRY
      (Child like tone)
I do not whine. I protest aloud.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (Shakes her head)
Honey, You should have quit while
I was ahead.
                                                            
All three of them laugh.

The scene shifts to the alley they are traveling along, a
shadow moves along the wall.
A trashcan is knocked over behind the three friends. As the
three look behind them, they see the can knocked over. Perry
looks forward and sees a middle aged man looking back at
him. The other two look forward.
                                                            
                       KARLOFF
      (cold tone)
You don’t mind the intrusion do
you? I am in need of your
assistance.
                                                            
                       PERRY
      (Gulping)
umm, may we help you?
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (Reaching for mace
       in her purse)
What the hell do you want?
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Very calm)
Your kidding right?
                                                            

3.

                       KARLOFF
      (Slight Smile)
Yes you can help me, and what I
want is your blood to help me.
(Looks at Gerald) and NO I am not
kidding!
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Reaching for his
       pocket knife)
There is something about this guy
i don't like.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (Spraying the mace
       at Karloff)
I want to see how tough you are
blind.
                                                            
The man moves at a blurring rate. The mace spray misses its
target. The man backhands Gerald in the chest. Gerald flies
back ten feet and hits the ground with a crunch. The man
then stares at Jasmira making her fall to her knees; Perry
begins to run down the alley. The shadows along the walls of
the alley grab Perry and subdue him with ease. The man walks
up to Gerald.
                                                            
                       PERRY
      (Stunned
       expression)
Huh? How? Why...
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Coughing)
Who or what are you?
                                                            
                       KARLOFF
      (Serious tone)
My name is Karloff Baronze, and
tonight is your lucky night. It
isn’t often an ancient such as
myself feels the need to bring a
new recruit across but there is
something about you.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Still wheezing)
Lucky? And bring across?
                                                            

4.

                       KARLOFF
      (Eyes Glowing Red)
Lets just say you are very lucky
and we don’t have any more time to
waste.
                                                            
Karloff picks up Gerald and walks into a shadow.
The other Shadows grab the other two and absorbs them.

Scene pans over to a Green jaguar parked across from the
alley and the headlights come on. The car goes through the
alley very slowly then peels out and leaves.
                                                            
 
INT. INSIDE THE JAGUAR - NIGHT
                                                            
Two men are in the car, they are wearring suits they have
the typical federal agent look about them.
                                                            
                       AGENT WILSON
      (Peering through a
       pair of
       binoculars)
Seems we have another about to
come across.
                                                            
                       ZERIKIAH
      (shuffling his
       cards)
I do think your right. Lets watch
this carefully the others will
want a full report.
                                                            
                       AGENT WILSON
      (still watching)
This ancient, how long has he been
around? I mean we have dealt with
old vampires before why all the
top security on this one?
                                                            
                       ZERIKIAH
      (flipping one card
       up)
He has been in existence long
enough to have seen Egypt’s 1st
dynasty.
                                                            
                       AGENT WILSON
      (gulps)
Are you sure we can handle him? I
thought vampires gained strength
with age?
                                                            

5.

                       ZERIKIAH
      (Mono-tone)
They do. Now lets get moving
before we lose him again.
                                                            
The Jaguar follows Karloff slowly, the car itself makes
virtually no noise and seems to go unnoticed down the
street.
                                                            
                       ZERIKIAH
      (dialing on a cell
       phone)
We have made visual contact with
the ancient. What is our next
step?
                                                            
                       AGENT WILSON
      (driving the car)
He is turning onto that alley two
blocks ahead.
                                                            
                       ZERIKIAH
      (Still on the
       phone)
Yes i understand sir, we will not
fail you.
                                                            
                       ZERIKIAH
      (Looking over at
       Wilson)
Don't follow him. If we get made
he will tear us both apart.
                                                            
                       AGENT WILSON
      (starting to sweat)
I.. I see, I will park just before
the alley so we can get out and
take a look.
                                                            
                       ZERIKIAH
      (flipping another
       card)
No. Don't do that, lets get back
to headquarters and figure out
what he is doing. Ancients don't
tend to bring others across.
                                                            
                       AGENT WILSON
      (sigh of relief)
Sounds like a plan sir, We can get
backup and take this guy down once
and for all.
                                                            

6.

                       ZERIKIAH
      (Thinking to
       himself whil
       glancing at
       Wilson)
You don't realize what we are
dealing with. This creature has
the strength of fifty men and the
durability of a tank. We will need
more then backup on this. But i
have a plan.
                                                            
The dark green Jaguar returns to a garage and parks in a
stall.
The two men exit the car and walk into the building.
                                                            
 
INT. SAAGAN HOUSE - DAY
                                                            
Scene opens at the Saagan house, Jasmira is cooking
breakfast in the kitchen. Perry comes down the stairs and
walks into the kitchen.
                                                            
                       PERRY
      (Half awake look)
Morning honey. What smells so
good?
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (Flipping an egg)
Hi hon., you hungry? I am
attempting to cook eggs.
                                                            
                       PERRY
      (scratching his
       head)
Yes I am, by the way where is
Gerald this morning?
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (Putting some eggs
       on a plate)
Not sure, I haven’t seen him
today.
                                                            
                       PERRY
      (walking towards a
       bedroom door)
Oh? He normally comes running when
the smell of food is in the house.
                                                            

7.

                       JASMIRA
      (Putting some eggs
       on a second plate)
I bet he went looking for work.
                                                            
                       PERRY
      (Confused look)
I am extremely hungry those eggs
smell so good. The last time you
cooked breakfast I think was
before we were married wasn’t it?
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
Well yes I think it was. But thank
you for the compliment. Could you
set the table?
                                                            
Perry begins to set the table.

Perry goes to Gerald’s room and knocks on the door.
                                                            
                       PERRY
      (Waiting at the
       door)
Gerald? You home?
      (Looking over at
       Jasmira)
Your right Jas, not a sound coming
from his room.
                                                            
Perry waits for a minute, and then he walks back to the
dining room.
Perry sits down as Jas brings out the breakfast, they begin
to eat.
The scene backs away from the kitchen and dining area in a
first person view.

The view shifts and goes through a bedroom door down the
hall on the main floor of the house. Inside the bedroom what
is seen is a dark room with sheets over the windows.
A hand is seen sticking out from under the bed.

There is a knock at the back door of the house.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (Doing some dishes)
Perry bring me that pan over
there.
      (Looks up at the
       door as it opens)
Mouse! It has been awhile since i
last saw you.
                                                            

8.

                       MOUSE
      (Walking into the
       house)
Hey Jas and Perry! How are you
both?
                                                            
                       PERRY
      (Giving Jasmira
       the pan)
Good and you?
                                                            
                       MOUSE
      (Nervous tone)
I had a terrible feeling last
night, did anything happen?
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (Stops doing
       dishes and grabs
       a towel to wipe
       her hands)
No, Perry, Gerald and I went to a
movie last night.
                                                            
                       PERRY
      (Rolling his eyes)
Yeah, Orange shoes is kind of
dull, but I survived.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (Smiling)
I thought it was all right; I
wouldn’t pay to see it again
though.
                                                            
                       MOUSE
Well as long as everyone is ok.
Where is Gerald?
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (Shrugs)
I think he went looking for a job
or had a job interview.
                                                            
                       MOUSE
Oh? Where at?
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (Pours a cup of
       coffee.)
Some coffee shop, you know Gerald
and his coffee.
                                                            

9.

                       PERRY
      (chuckling)
That would be perfect for him.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (Walks into the
       dining room with
       her coffee)
Hey Mouse want to play “Munchkin”?
                                                            
                       PERRY
      (Getting the cards
       for the game)
Yeah we bought it a couple of days
ago and we haven't played it yet.
                                                            
                       MOUSE
      (Pours some coffee)
Sure, sounds like fun.
                                                            
LATER THAT DAY
                                                            
We see Gerald convulsing under his bed, he crawls out from
under the bed, and then walks over to the window curtains.
He sticks his hand past the sheets to the glass. He quickly
pulls his hand back as we see he has third degree burns all
over his hand.
                                                            
                       GERALD (vo)
      (holding his burnt
       hand)
It’s true, I am a creature of the
damned now. Great just great. I
was told not to tell anyone, I
guess in a way I have always
wanted this type of power. The
urge to commit acts of pure hate
and violence seem to be
controllable.
                                                            
                       GERALD (vo)
      (walking to his
       desk he grabs a
       pen and paper)
Well I use to play a role playing
game called vampire, I hope this
is similar or I may really start
to hate this.
                                                            
Walking over to his CD player he opens a box behind it.
Inside the box is a bunch of eighties music he grabs a
Tiffany CD and puts it in.
                                                            

10.

                       GERALD (VO)
      (Starts to drum
       his fingers to
       the beat)
Who would think, a damned creature
of the night rocking to Tiffany.
Things can’t get much weirder.
                                                            
                       GERALD (VO)
      (Tearful
       expression)
Well I suppose it’s better that I
don’t have anyone special in my
life currently. Although I was
hoping I would be able to get back
together with my ex. I guess that
isn’t what fate had in store for
me. I wonder just how lonely
someone can get without completely
snapping; I guess I will find out.
                                                            
Gerald pulls out an old photo album of him and his friends
from long ago; He also sees pictures of his ex girlfriend.
He stares at the pictures intently. When the sun goes down
Gerald sneaks out of the house not knowing a whole lot of
what he can do he tries things he has seen in movies and for
the most part they work to a slight degree. He goes to
different friends houses and just watches from outside their
homes while he reflects on just what price he is paying for
his newfound power. He stops by his ex girlfriends house and
he sees her through her living room window and watches her
make dinner for herself. Gerald at this point leaves and
goes back home he knows that this power of his has to have
some kind of perk other then living almost forever, because
who would want to live forever alone.
                                                            
 
INT. IN JASMIRA'S ATTIC/STUDIO - NIGHT
                                                            
LATER THAT EVENING
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Yelling up the
       base of the
       stairs)
Jas? You up there?
                                                            
                       JASMIRA (OS)
      (Yelling back)
Yes, come up.
                                                            

11.

                       GERALD
      (Walking up the
       stairs)
I am glad your home. I wanted to
talk to you.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (Sitting in her
       chair with her
       laptop computer
       on her lap)
Hi Gerald, you missed a wonderful
time over at Mouse’s house.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (scratching his
       head)
Sorry, I had some things to do
today. How is Michael anyway?
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (Broad smile)
Oooo, you called him Michael. Your
lucky he isn’t here. He hates it
when people call him by his real
name.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Big grin)
That’s why I said it. Because he
wasn’t here.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (raising her
       eyebrow)
I wonder what you say about me
when i am not around?
      (slight pause then
       turns her
       computer around)
Oh by the way I got accepted by an
agent so right now I am working.
Want to hear my ideas on a movie I
am writing?
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Sitting down in a
       chair)
sure, I have some time to kill,
and it would be nice to get a
heads up.
                                                            
TWO HOURS PASS
                                                            

12.

                       GERALD
      (Standing up from
       the chair)
Well I better go, I need to get to
bed.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (closes her
       computer)
Did you get the job? You normally
stay up all hours of the night.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (smiles)
Yeah I did, so I better start
getting use to getting up early.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (looking at Gerald)
Glad to hear it, I may stop in
sometime to see you.
                                                            
He stops just before descending the stairwell.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (looking back at
       Jasmira)
Jas? You remember when we talked
with Mouse and we all agreed that
all three of us would be friends
forever?
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (Curious tone)
Yes? Why?
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Hesitates for a
       moment)
Nothing Jas, Goodnight.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
Ok Gerald, Goodnight
                                                            
 
INT. RESTAURANT - NIGHT
                                                            
ONE WEEK LATER
                                                            
the scene opens up at a Japanese Restaurant.
The restaurant is full of patrons; people are hustling past
each other.
The time is 10:00 PM Gerald, Jasmira, Mouse and Perry are

13.

sitting at a table.
                                                            
                       PERRY
      (Grabbing a glass
       of water)
So were all here Gerald, what is
the occasion? And am I picking up
the tab?
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Looking around
       the table at
       everyone here.)
No you’re not picking up the tab
this time, my job needs me to
relocate.
And I will be moving pretty far
away actually.
                                                            
                       MOUSE
      (looking over the
       alcohol list)
I am glad to hear your doing well,
which coffee shop is it anyway?
Must be a chain or something.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (looking at
       Jasmira)
About 650 miles from here
actually, my job has a branch
located in Rapid City South
Dakota.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (Sour look)
That is pretty far, Are you sure
you want to do that?
                                                            
                       PERRY
      (Looking at Gerald)
If that is what you want to do,
were behind you.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Looking back at
       Perry)
It may only be for a few years, I
hope to come back. This is my home
after all.
                                                            

14.

                       JASMIRA
      (Looking at Gerald)
Were going to miss you. Are you
going to visit often?
                                                            
                       MOUSE
      (Questioning tone)
Really?
      (Raises his
       eyebrow at Gerald)
So Gerald why does this coffee
shop need to relocate you?
Wouldn’t it be better to hire from
the locals to save on expenses?
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Looking at Mouse)
I would tell you, but I can’t
right now.
Maybe when some time has passed I
can let you in.
                                                            
                       MOUSE
      (Looking into
       Gerald's eyes)
This has nothing to do with coffee
does it?
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Clearing his
       throat)
Mouse my friend. I cannot say. I
hope you understand in time.
                                                            
The server comes over with everyone’s food; Gerald doesn’t
eat as the four friends talk about old times. Gerald then
excuses himself, but instead of using the bathroom he goes
over to the cashier and pays for the meals, then he slips
out of the restaurant.
                                                            
                       PERRY
      (getting some
       bread from the
       loaf on the table)
Mouse you don't have to be so hard
on him. Gerald wouldn't do
anything wrong.
                                                            

15.

                       MOUSE
      (Looking at Perry)
Gerald has been down on his luck
for a couple of years. I think he
is on the verge of doing anything.
                                                            
                       PERRY
      (Looking at Mouse)
I know how his luck has been. Jas
and I have been taking care of
his bills since he has come to
live with us.
      (Looking over at
       Jasmira)
Do you think he is doing something
wrong to get money?
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (hesitates)
No honey he wouldn't.
      (Looking over at
       mouse)
We need to trust in what he is
doing is the right thing.
                                                            
 
EXT. OUTSIDE THE RESTAURANT - NIGHT
                                                            
Gerald is on his way to his car when a couple thugs jump
him.
                                                            
                       THUG 1
      (Pulling a gun out
       of his pants)
Where do you think your going prep
boy?
                                                            
                       THUG 2
      (Pulling a knife
       from his coat)
Hand over your money!
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Unlocking his car)
I really don't have any time for
this nonsense. I am only going to
ask you once to leave.
                                                            
                       THUG 1
      (Smirks)
Are you stupid? You heard my
friend.
Now give us your money.
                                                            

16.

                       GERALD
      (eyes glow red
       like fires in his
       eyes, then turns
       and stares at the
       two thugs)
Leave me alone!
                                                            
The two thugs see Gerald’s eyes and begin to panic as if by
some animal instinct of predator and prey strikes fear into
them. They turn and run.

Gerald gets into his car, adjusts his mirror and his eyes
are normal.
                                                            
                       GERALD (VO)
      (Starting his car)
I guess my powers are linked to my
emotions. That is a very dangerous
thing since i bottle everything
up.
Although the sight of them running
like that almost made me laugh.
                                                            
 
INT. INSIDE THE SUBURBAN - NIGHT
                                                            
Gerald is driving a Chevy Chevette, he speeds down the
interstate heading for downtown Minneapolis, following him
is a suburban all black with a license plate that reads “DCD
1”, they stay at four car lengths behind him.
                                                            
                       AGENT WILSON
      (Talking into his
       cell phone)
Yes we are following him.
                                                            
                       ZERIKIAH (On Phone)
Good, make sure you find the
ancient before he finds us. Do I
make myself clear?
                                                            
                       AGENT WILSON
      (Talking into the
       cell phone)
Yes you do sir. We won’t let the
ancient get away this time.
                                                            
                       ZERIKIAH (On Phone)
Make sure you get it right this
time. Karloff Baronze is a
creature older then any other
vampire we have ever hunted. Do
            (MORE)

17.

                       ZERIKIAH (cont'd)
not underestimate him.
                                                            
                       AGENT WILSON
      (Gulps)
yes sir. I won't.
                                                            
                       ZERIKIAH (On Phone)
And another thing, if he gets wind
we are actively hunting him. Who
do you think he will kill first?
The guy right in arms grasp or the
contact on the phone, if you screw
this up again I will feed you to
the leeches myself.
                                                            
The phone goes quiet after a click.
                                                            
                       AGENT WILSON
      (Looking at the
       driver in the
       suburban)
We better keep a safer distance.
We don’t need to get spotted or
even leave a clue we are
following.
                                                            
The suburban falls back three more car lengths.
                                                            
Gerald noticing the dark suburban that has now dropped back
further, realizes he is being followed so he drives around
downtown for awhile to try and lose them.
                                                            
                       AGENT WILSON
      (Looking nervous)
I think he knows. Damnit!
                                                            
                       DRIVER 1
      (Turns down a side
       street)
I know a short cut around the main
traffic.
                                                            
                       AGENT WILSON
      (Looking at the
       driver)
Do you know where he is going?
                                                            

18.

                       DRIVER 1
      (Looks back at
       Wilson)
No, but i do know where that
street ends up in two blocks.
                                                            
                       AGENT WILSON
      (Looking at the
       driver)
You better not lose him or we are
both leech food.
                                                            
 
INT. INSIDE THE WAREHOUSE - NIGHT
                                                            
The scene opens in a warehouse; the warehouse is filled with
bricks and other construction materials. Gerald walks into
the building and starts going over to a pile of cement
blocks in the middle of the warehouse. Karloff then steps
out of a shadow.
                                                            
                       KARLOFF
      (Looking at Gerald)
So have you said your goodbyes?
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Looking back at
       Karloff)
yes I have sir and my cover should
work.
                                                            
                       KARLOFF
      (Taking a ring out
       of his pocket)
I can make sure your cover sticks
to anyone that may inquire about
you.
      (Looking at Gerald)
Good, very good now your training
can start properly.
      (Handing Gerald
       the ring)
Now put this on. That will mark
you as mine to any of our kind
that spot you.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Looking nervous)
So how much training is there?
Will I be away very long? I have
so many friends here.
                                                            

19.

                       KARLOFF
      (smiles)
Well the basics take 4 years, the
specialized training takes another
6 years, but you live forever so
it really shouldn’t matter.
      (looks over at
       some ashes on the
       floor in the
       corner)
They will die long before you will
want to. You might want to try
breaking things off in the near
future so it isn't so painful when
their end comes.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Shocked)
I understand, where shall we
begin?
                                                            
                       KARLOFF
      (Looking at Gerald)
We begin with patience, as a
vampire you are no longer bound by
time.
                                                            
Karloff steps a little closer with his left hand on his
chin, before Gerald can blink Karloff back hands Gerald in
the face sending Gerald through the air landing around
thirty feet away in a pile of rubble. Gerald looking bloody
and battered starts coughing up blood.
                                                            
                       KARLOFF
      (Looking at gerald)
Now concentrate, will your body to
heal itself.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Gasping)
I will try sir.
                                                            
Puking blood all over the ground, Gerald can’t seem to stand
up.
                                                            
                       KARLOFF
      (staring at Gerald)
Don’t try, just do it! You cannot
be killed in that manner. The only
true death can occur by fire or
sunlight. Now get up, or I will
destroy you!
                                                            

20.

                       GERALD (VO)
      (closing his eyes)
I must stand up. I am not mortal
anymore. I can do it.
                                                            
Gerald’s wounds seem to close up almost instantly; he stands
up and opens his eyes which have turned into small fires as
they glow brightly.
                                                            
                       KARLOFF
      (Smiles)
Very good, I am impressed, you are
learning quickly.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Wobbling as he
       stands)
You caught me off guard, I didn’t
realize you were that fast.
                                                            
                       KARLOFF
      (Looking at Gerald)
That is the vampiric advantage, no
one really knows about us. And by
the time they see what we can do
it is too late. In time you will
learn how to do the things I can,
only time and patience will bring
forth your true potential.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Looking at
       himself)
I like the way we heal but I am
very hungry now.
                                                            
                       KARLOFF
      (looking at Gerald)
Healing does that; I hit you hard
enough to kill a mortal instantly,
so you have healed many bones and
all internal injuries. Let us go
and get something to eat.
                                                            
Karloff and Gerald leave the warehouse. Karloff’s voice is
heard “Now I will teach you how to feed, this is very
important. Then we must depart for South Dakota.”
                                                            
 

21.

EXT. DOWNTOWN MPLS - NIGHT
                                                            
Two vans follow Karloff and Gerald for a few hours. Karloff
shows Gerald good spots to feed at. The best places to go
unnoticed.
                                                            
                       KARLOFF
      (Holding a young
       woman)
Now use your mind to overcome
hers. The tell her to be calm and
to forget what is about to happen.
Most people think of these little
fragments of time as daydreams.
                                                            
Gerald concentrates and stares at the woman for awhile.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (With a commanding
       tone)
You will be calm. You will enjoy
this. and then you will forget
what is about to transpire.
                                                            
The woman goes limp as Gerald bites her throat and drinks
some of her blood.
                                                            
                       KARLOFF
      (looking at Gerald)
Well you seem to be getting the
hang of it in a very short amount
of time.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Looking at
       Karloff)
It isn’t something I like having
to do. But I can manage.
                                                            
Karloff notices one of the vans parking a block behind
Gerald. Karloff focuses his sight on the van and he
instantly sees everyone in the van in almost a thermal view.
                                                            
                       KARLOFF
      (starts walking
       down th alley)
Lets go this way, this may be
interesting.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (following close
       behind)
Doesn’t this alley lead to a
shipping area for the downtown
            (MORE)

22.

                       GERALD (cont'd)
businesses?
                                                            
                       KARLOFF
      (Turns a corner)
Yes it does, the best places for
no holds barred fights.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (following karloff)
Fights? Is there something I
should be aware of?
                                                            
                       KARLOFF
      (walking a little
       faster)
Nothing to worry about, you watch
and learn. I will do the work this
time. Follow me and hurry!
                                                            
Karloff and Gerald walk down to the shipping and receiving
area.
They find a truck parked there, along with some large
crates.
Karloff points to the cab of the truck, Gerald goes into the
truck.
Karloff vanishes from plain sight as the van can now be seen
coming down the alley.
Karloff runs past the van at a blurring rate and slams his
body into the side of it.
The van tips over and we hear the sounds of people
screaming.
Karloff reaches into the passenger side of the van and grabs
the agent.
He then throws the agent twenty feet through the air and the
agent falls to the ground with a thud and a crack.
                                                            
                       KARLOFF
      (yells over to
       Gerald's hiding
       spot)
Lets go.
                                                            
Two of the agents get out of the van they take aim with
their side arms. gerald gets out of the truck and follows
Karloff.
                                                            
                       KARLOFF
      (spins around and
       stares at the
       agents)
Why don’t you so called agents
just go away before I get very
            (MORE)

23.

                       KARLOFF (cont'd)
angry.
                                                            
The two agents turn and run the opposite way, after they are
out of sight. Gerald and Karloff run back down the alley and
escape detection.
                                                            
AN HOUR OR SO LATER BACK AT THE WAREHOUSE
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Looking at
       Karloff)
What happened out there?
                                                            
                       KARLOFF
      (Looking back at
       Gerald)
Old enemies. You will learn of
them soon enough. We need to pack
and go quickly.
                                                            
Gerald leaves the warehouse in a hurry.
                                                            
                       KARLOFF (VO)
      (Getting a
       necklace from a
       bag)
There you are.
      (Looking at the
       necklace)
I almost forgot about you.
      (Looking at the
       door where Gerald
       left)
This one will not die so easily. I
swear on your grave Lillith this
time will be different.
                                                            
 
INT. BROKEN BOOT MINE - NIGHT
                                                            
THREE DAYS LATER
                                                            
The scene opens up in a small house built into an old gold
mine; Karloff and Gerald are awake and talking.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Looking around
       the mine)
This place is great? How did you
do this?
                                                            

24.

                       KARLOFF
      (Unpacking some
       clothes)
This mine has been closed for
years, a small company I own
bought the property and I had the
house constructed underneath the
noses of the mortals.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (pressing his hand
       against the stone
       walls)
Where are we? I mean I didn’t
realize this place was so hilly.
                                                            
                       KARLOFF
      (Looking over to
       Gerald)
Were at the Broken Boot Gold mine,
near Lead and Deadwood, South
Dakota.
An old friend of mine was killed
in these parts many years ago.
Maybe you heard of him, Wild Bill?
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Walking over to
       Karloff)
Yea, I heard of him but he was way
before my time.
                                                            
                       KARLOFF
      (Big sigh)
Well I am afraid over the year’s
time slips from my grasp.
But William taught me something
very important.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Curious tone)
A mortal taught you something?
What was that?
                                                            
                       KARLOFF
      (looking Gerald
       straight in the
       eye)
Always hold your aces and eights.
You see sometimes mortals can give
you a clear perception of the time
            (MORE)

25.

                       KARLOFF (cont'd)
you live in.
                                                            
                       KARLOFF
      (starts walking
       toward the
       entrance to the
       mine)
Lets check out the sights and
maybe grab a snack.
                                                            
Gerald and Karloff after exploring the town for an hour or
so find themselves at “Miss Kitty’s” they decide to play
some blackjack while they kill some time before they go
feed.
                                                            
 
INT. INSIDE THE OFFICE BUILDING - NIGHT
                                                            
Scene opens at an office building, Zerikiah and three other
agents are in an office.
The building is very dark except for a couple of soft
lights.
                                                            
                       ZERIKIAH
      (Looking at the
       blank expressions
       of his agents)
So where did they go? Does anyone
know?
                                                            
                       AGENT WILSON
      (wearring a cast
       on his left arm)
Sorry no leads yet sir.
                                                            
                       AGENT SOMERS
      (Holding a
       clipboard)
We last tracked him leaving the
state.
                                                            
                       ZERIKIAH
      (Walking over to
       Agent Somers)
Well at least that is something.
Any leads to where he may have
gone too? Like a direction maybe?
                                                            
                       AGENT SOMERS
      (checking his
       clipboard)
He was last seen on highway 212
            (MORE)

26.

                       AGENT SOMERS (cont'd)
heading westbound. That’s about
all we know right now.
                                                            
                       ZERIKIAH
      (Looking at Agent
       Somers)
Your kidding right? All of our
resources and all the millions of
tax dollars funding this federal
division and we can’t even follow
a vehicle leaving the state?
                                                            
A slight pause as they hear a knock at the door.
                                                            
                       ZERIKIAH
      (Waving his hands
       in a fury)
What if that was him? Wouldn’t
that be nice? I am surrounded by
idiots!
                                                            
                       AGENT WILSON
      (Walks up to the
       door and turns to
       Zerikiah with a
       sarcastic tone)
Well-paid Idiots sir.
                                                            
                       ZERIKIAH
      (Rolling his eyes)
Let them in, I called in for
better equipment and more
experienced personnel.
                                                            
The door opens and four men walk in, they are dressed in
military uniforms.
One of them has a scar on his face.
                                                            
                       SGT. BRANSON
      (Enetring the room
       and looking it
       over carefully)
Clear!
      (Pointing to two
       of his men)
You two take the window and watch
for anything that moves.
      (Points at the
       third man)
You watch the door.
                                                            

27.

A woman walks in dressed in military garb. She studies the
agents.
                                                            
                       SGT. WILLIAMS
      (Looking everyone
       over)
My name is Sergeant Williams. You
may call me Seargent.
                                                            
                       ZERIKIAH
      (Looking at
       Seargent williams)
Sgt. Williams I am very glad to
meet you. The ancient named
Karloff has eluded my men again. I
think your help is greatly needed.
                                                            
                       SGT. WILLIAMS
      (Looking at
       Zerikiah)
We need all the information you
have on him along with where his
last know whereabouts were. And
Zerikiah no mis-information this
situation is very serious.
                                                            
                       ZERIKIAH
      (Walks over to the
       desk and opens
       his laptop)
You have been given top clearance
on this matter you and your team
can check our database.
                                                            
                       SGT. WILLIAMS
      (Looking at the
       database)
Wonderful. This will help. We will
start doing our job. Yours is to
do more intel gathering.
                                                            
 
INT. AT THE SAAGAN HOUSE - NIGHT
                                                            
TEN YEARS LATER
                                                            
Scene starts at the Saagan house with
Perry and Mouse playing a computer game.
Perry seems to be winning from the looks of Mouse's
expression.
                                                            

28.

                       MOUSE
      (Pushing buttons
       feaverishly)
Oh darn! I don’t think I am any
good at this game.
                                                            
                       PERRY
      (Pushing two
       buttons)
I beat this game long ago.
                                                            
                       MOUSE
      (Looking over at
       Perry)
Long ago?? It came out last month.
                                                            
                       PERRY
      (Looking back at
       Mouse)
Last month is a long time for me.
                                                            
Phone rings.
Perry gets up and answers the phone in the other room.
                                                            
                       PERRY
      (Gets up and
       answers the phone)
Hello?
                                                            
                       NURSE (On Phone)
Mr. Saagan? This is city general.
                                                            
                       PERRY
      (Confused look)
Yes?? What can I do for you?
                                                            
                       NURSE (On Phone)
Your wife has been in an accident,
you should come here immediately.
                                                            
                       PERRY
      (Slamming down the
       phone as his face
       starts to lose
       color)
I will be right there!
                                                            
                       MOUSE
      (Stands up)
What’s wrong?
                                                            

29.

                       PERRY
      (Getting his coat
       and shoes)
Jas has been in an accident!
                                                            
                       MOUSE
      (Running for the
       door)
I’ll go get the car, and pull
around front.
                                                            
Mouse leaves and gets the car; Perry grabs his keys and his
wallet and takes his cell phone off the charger then leaves
out the front door. They arrive at the hopital a short time
later.
                                                            
                       PERRY
      (Walking up to the
       desk)
I am Mr. Saagan, what room is my
wife Jasmira in?
                                                            
                       NURSE
      (Tapping on a
       computer)
Mr. Saagan, she is in room 217.
                                                            
Perry and Mouse leave the desk and hurry to the second floor
to find 217.
As Perry and Mouse arrive the door to 217 opens and a nurse
comes out.
                                                            
                       NURSE
      (Closing the door
       behind her)
Excuse me, who are you?
                                                            
                       PERRY
      (staring at the
       Nurse with a
       concerned look)
I am Mr. Saagan, and this is our
family friend Michael.
                                                            
                       NURSE
      (Looking at Perry)
Mr. Saagan, I am glad you are
here; your wife is stable yet in
critical condition.
You may go in and see her, but
please keep the visit short.
                                                            

30.

                       MOUSE
      (Looking at Perry)
I’ll wait here a minute Perry; you
go in and see her.
                                                            
                       PERRY
      (Looking over at
       Mouse)
I will be out in a bit. Maybe get
us some coffee or something.
                                                            
The sounds of beeps and drips emanate from the door as Perry
steps through.
Jasmira is hooked up to a lot of machines and a tube runs
into her mouth.
A machine helps her breath.
                                                            
                       PERRY
      (Perry struggles
       to hold back
       tears)
Hi honey, I'm here and so is
Mouse.
                                                            
                       PERRY
      (Taking a moment
       to compose
       himself)
I know I don’t do things you would
like me to do all the time, I also
know sometimes I am a bit of a
child with certain matters, but I
love you and I don’t want you to
leave me. Oh God please don’t take
her from me! Please!
                                                            
Perry grabs Jasmira’s hand and holds it, as he cries at her
bedside
                                                            
Outside Jasmira's room Mouse is waiting and seems to be
looking around looking for someone
                                                            
                       GERALD (OS)
Hi Mouse, I heard what happened.
How is Jasmira?
                                                            
                       MOUSE
      (Looking off to
       the left of his
       chair)
Oh Gerald, thank the powers that
be you’re here. I don’t know how
            (MORE)

31.

                       MOUSE (cont'd)
Jas is. Perry is in with her now.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Putting his hand
       on Mouse's
       shoulder)
Everything is going to be fine
Mouse, trust me on that.
                                                            
The door to Jasmira’s room opens, Perry comes out with tears
streaking down his face.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (looking at Perry)
How is she Perry?
                                                            
                       PERRY
      (dazed)
Not good, not good at all. I can’t
lose her, I just can’t.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Looking at Perry)
I know, none of us can lose her;
it will be all right Perry.
                                                            
                       MOUSE
      (tears on his face)
Thank you Gerald. I was going to
but i didn't want to leave in case
Perry came out.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Looking at both
       Mouse and Perry)
I am going to grab some coffee for
all of us, I will be right back.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Looking at Mouse)
Not a Problem.
                                                            
Gerald walks down the hallway and around a corner, and then
fades from view.
Gerald reappears in Jasmira’s room a few moments later.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Standing above
       Jasmira looking
       at her frail form)
Jas, Jas, what have you done to
yourself? Perry isn’t the only one
            (MORE)

32.

                       GERALD (cont'd)
who needs you. There are things
out there you would love to see
still.
      (Grabbing
       Jasmira's hand)
I was hoping to do this another
way, but we don’t have much time.
So the world will just have to
think you died.
                                                            
Gerald’s eyes glow red, he shows his fangs and bites into
Jasmira’s throat.
                                                            
 
INT. INSIDE THE HOSPITAL - NIGHT
                                                            
Out in the hallway the hospital intercom says “Code blue
217, code blue 217”.
Perry rushes through the door. The machines are beeping and
making all kinds of noises.
                                                            
                       PERRY
      (Rushing for the
       door)
No Jasmira! Nooooo!
                                                            
Doctors and nurses rush in. Moving around Jasmira and
working on her.
                                                            
                       NURSE
      (Taking hold of
       Perry)
Mr. Saagan you will have to leave
now please.
                                                            
Perry is escorted out into the hallway. Perry peers into the
room from the door window.
                                                            
                       PERRY
      (Still looking
       through the door
       window)
Why is this happening!?!
                                                            
Gerald comes around the corner with a tray of 3 coffees.
                                                            

33.

                       GERALD
      (Putting down the
       tray on th side
       table)
What’s going on?
                                                            
                       MOUSE
      (starting to cry)
Jasmira seems to be slipping away.
                                                            
                       PERRY
      (Defensive tone)
No she isn’t, she can’t!
What am I going to do?
                                                            
                       MOUSE
      (Comforting Perry)
It will be all right, I know it
will. Right Gerald?
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (looking at Perry)
She will be fine Perry. You have
to trtust that.
                                                            
Door to the room opens, the doctor steps out.
                                                            
                       DOCTOR
      (Taking off his
       gloves)
Mr. Saagan?
                                                            
                       PERRY
      (Stepping Forward)
Is she going to be all right?
                                                            
                       DOCTOR
      (Putting his hand
       on Perry's
       shoulder)
I am sorry Mr. Saagan, we did all
we could. She didn’t make it.
                                                            
Scene backs up showing Perry sitting in a chair crying and
screaming Why!
Both Mouse and Gerald are sitting with him.
                                                            
                                                            
 

34.

INT. SAAGAN HOUSE - NIGHT
                                                            
Scene opens with Gerald speaking with Perry about the
funeral arrangements.
They are at Perry’s house in his kitchen. Later that
evening.
                                                            
                       PERRY
      (Sniffling)
We can’t do this yet, it is to
soon.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Staring into
       Perry's eyes)
You need to have her cremated.
                                                            
                       PERRY
      (Glazed look)
Maybe I should change things to
her getting cremated.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Still staring at
       Perry)
That’s a good idea Perry. Maybe I
should let you get some sleep now.
Goodnight Perry. In the morning
your pain will lesson.
                                                            
                       PERRY
      (Still with a
       glazed look)
Goodnight Gerald i need to get
some sleep now. You are a very
good friend. I will see you
tomorrow.
                                                            
Gerald leaves the house and gets into his car; he drives
around the bad parts of town looking for low lives and other
scum.
He finds a small group of gang bangers hanging around a
street corner.
Gerald pulls over and gets out of his car and proceeds
towards the gang members.
                                                            
                       GANG 1
      (Pointing over to
       Gerald)
Hey look guys, there’s a Yuppie.
                                                            

35.

                       GANG 2
      (Pulling his gun)
Wonder what that fool is thinking.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Walking towards
       the gang members)
Sup you all. Can i have some fun?
                                                            
                       GANG 2
      (Looking at Gang 1)
He can't be talkin to us.
      (Looking over to
       Gerald)
You talking to us Yuppie?
                                                            
                       GANG 1
      (Pulls out his gun)
What you got in your wallet?
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Broad smile,
       points to the
       gang members)
Lets see what you got.
                                                            
Gerald Accelerates his speed to a blinking flash and smacks
Gang 1. Gang 1 flies 6 feet through the air and lands on the
pavement with a crunch. Then stands in front of gang 2.
The the remaining two gang members run away in terror.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Staring at the
       last gang member)
Now as you were saying?
                                                            
                       GANG 2
      (Look of terror on
       their face)
I.. I.. I don't want to die man.
Take everything i have. Please
don't kill me.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (staring into the
       last gangmembers
       eyes)
You won’t remember what transpired
here, now leave and go back home.
                                                            
                       GANG 2
      (Running away)
I gotta go man. Seeya!
                                                            

36.

Gerald picks up the limp gang member puts him in his car,
then drives to the morgue.
                                                            
 
INT. CITY MORGUE - NIGHT
                                                            
Scene opens later the same evening, at the morgue with a
body bag.
Using an ability to hide from mortal sight he easily makes
it to the main morgue room.
                                                            
                       MORTICIAN (VO)
      (Opening a file)
Poor Woman.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Stepping out of a
       shadow)
Indeed she is.
                                                            
                       MORTICIAN
      (Closing the file)
What? Who are you? How did you ---
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Staring into the
       Mortician's eyes)
Shhh. Listen. The woman needs to
be cremated as soon as possible,
tonight is the best. Now sit and
write down the cremation
paperwork.
                                                            
Gerald goes over with his bag and drops the bag on the
floor.
He opens it and removes the gang member’s lifeless body.
He then places Jasmira’s body in the bag and sets the gang
members body
On the slab.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Picking up the
       bag)
Now do as I say, and I was never
here.
                                                            
                       MORTICIAN (VO)
      (Starts writing in
       Jasmira's file)
Cremation of Jasmira Saagan is
warranted.
                                                            

37.

CUT TO --SCENE FLIPS TO AN OFFICE
                                                            
                       AGENT WILSON
      (Looking at
       Zerikiah)
Sir, we have a lead on the child
of the ancient.
                                                            
                       ZERIKIAH
      (Flipping three
       cards from the
       top of his deck)
I know, I have been watching him.
Apparently he brought across
another one.
                                                            
                       AGENT WILSON
      (Looking at
       Zerikiah)
Are you sure about that, normally
the leeches only replace lost
numbers or once per century.
                                                            
                       ZERIKIAH
      (Flips another
       card then looks
       at wilson)
I am sure, that leech must be
stopped. Son of an ancient or not.
Wilson you realize these creatures
are not human.
                                                            
                       AGENT WILSON
      (Looking at
       Zerikiah)
Yes I do, I don’t mean to be
sympathetic to their existence I
just wish I could learn why they
are here and how.
                                                            
                       ZERIKIAH
      (Shuffling his
       deck)
That’s your problem Wilson, you
think too much.
                                                            
                       AGENT WILSON
      (Sigh)
Understood sir.
                                                            

38.

Agent Wilson gets some gear together and gets his car keys.
Zerikiah starts flipping cards.
                                                            
                       AGENT WILSON
      (Looking at the
       cards)
Why do you flip the cards like
that sir?
                                                            
                       ZERIKIAH
      (Chuckles)
You ask so many useless questions
Wilson, It amazes me you made it
into the agency.
                                                            
                       AGENT WILSON
      (Looking at
       Zerikiah)
I was just making small talk; I
didn’t mean to offend you.
                                                            
                       ZERIKIAH
      (shuffling again)
Small talk is for small time; you
are in with the big boys now. So
act like you know what you are
doing.
                                                            
                       AGENT WILSON
      (starts grabbing
       more gear)
I will stow the gear in the
suburban and wait for you. Is
there anything else I can help
with before we split up?
                                                            
                       ZERIKIAH
      (Watching his
       cards and not
       paying attention
       to Wilson)
Whatever.
                                                            
Wilson loads up the suburban with the high tech gear.
                                                            
 
INT. CONSTRUCTION WAREHOUSE - NIGHT
                                                            
Scene opens in a construction warehouse, there are piles of
materials littered about the place. A make shift bed made
out of construction slabs and materials is used to keep
Jasmira off the ground. Jasmira is starting to come to.
                                                            

39.

                       GERALD
      (Looking at
       Jasmira)
Good evening Jas.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (A bit shaken and
       confused)
Where am I?
      (Glancing at
       herself)
What happened to me? Last thing I
remember was being hit. I think
hit by a semi.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Calm tone)
Well, that is correct. However you
didn’t perish from the accident.
I saved you from dying the true
death. My dear friend you are
considered dead to everyone.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (Looking less
       confused and more
       awake)
Dead? What are you talking about?
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Calm tone)
Let me explain things to you.
      (Slight pause)
About 10 years ago after our
weekend ritual of movie going, a
vampire attacked us.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (Getting up from
       the bed)
Vampire?? Gerald are you nuts?
Vampires aren't real.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Looking at
       Jasmira)
Yes a vampire. They do exist but
in a different capacity then what
as mortals we believed.
                                                            

40.

                       JASMIRA
      (Tries to stand
       but is very
       wobbly as she
       regains her
       strength slowly)
Your talking crazy. Is this a
joke? If it is it isn’t very
funny. Where is Perry?
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Helping Jasmira
       regain her sense
       of balance)
This is not a joke Jasmira. Now
listen, I had to bring you across
because of a promise I had made to
you and Mouse. This is true power,
and I know you both can be trusted
with it.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (Pushing Gerald
       away)
Wait! What about Perry? He needs
to know I am all right. Have you
already told him?
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Calm tone)
I am sorry Jas; he thinks you are
dead. And in a way he needs to
continue thinking that. It’s for
his best interest.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (Thinks for a
       moment)
Your right Gerald, this would be
too much for him, his universe he
knows and loves would be
destroyed, I can’t do that to him.
      (Nervous Tone)
So do we kill people to drink
their blood? Or What?
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Grabs a clean set
       of clothes)
No we don’t kill anyone, we can
drink slight amounts to maintain
ourselves or large amounts if we
are severely wounded. In general
there are enough people out at
            (MORE)

41.

                       GERALD (cont'd)
night to take a little here and
there and no one really knows or
cares.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (Euphoric look)
So this is your secret, this is
absolutely amazing.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Putting the
       clothes next to
       Jasmira)
It is also your secret now; you
must keep it. If humans were to
know we exist they would hunt what
they fear, even though we are the
last defense humanity has against
greater evil.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (Changes into real
       clothes from the
       hospital gown)
Greater evil? Now I am confused,
what else is out there?
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Turning away)
Demons, and other creatures that
would make the greatest of brave
people run in terror. We are apart
from humanity with a much longer
life span, in order to maintain a
balance and to make sure the evil
doesn’t continue. Vampires were,
from what I understand created by
the evil and then turned against
it. So we do have a powerful dark
side we can call forth. But doing
so brings us closer to what we
fear and destroy.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (Putting on her
       shoes)
I am starting to get the big
picture here. And I think I am
somewhat ready for what ever you
need me for.
                                                            

42.

                       GERALD
      (Turns back to
       jasmira)
Your prepared mentally, now I will
need to train you in your
supernatural powers.
                                                            
CUT TO --SCENE CHANGES TO THE INTERIOR OF A VAN.
                                                            
                       AGENT WILSON
      (Looking through
       binoculars,
       clicks his radio)
They’re inside, lets get ready to
move.
                                                            
                       AGENT SOMERS
      (Cocking his gun)
Shouldn’t we get ready to attack
now? Why are we waiting?
                                                            
                       AGENT WILSON
      (Looking over at
       Agent Somers)
No that is a safe haven, most
likely has traps and such. That is
their turf we wait till they leave
it.
                                                            
                       AGENT SOMERS
      (Looking at Wilson)
All right sir
      (Turns his head
       and clicks his
       radio)
Bravo team standby for my signal.
                                                            
                       AGENT WILSON
      (Looking back over
       to Agent somers)
If we lose the child we won’t live
to see dawn.
                                                            
                       AGENT SOMERS
      (Looking at the
       warehouse)
Yeah I know, this could get ugly
if we fail again.
                                                            
                       AGENT WILSON
      (Looking through
       his binoculars)
Ugly isn’t the half of it. You
heard what happened in Rapid City
            (MORE)

43.

                       AGENT WILSON (cont'd)
right?
                                                            
                       AGENT SOMERS
      (Looking over at
       Wilson)
Yeah, something about the ancient
and his child ripping apart the
military unit.
                                                            
                       AGENT WILSON
      (Looking back at
       Somers)
It seems this child has grown a
lot in his few years of being a
vampire; he has been compared to
some of the other nasty ones we
have fought.
                                                            
They see Gerald and Jasmira leave the warehouse; they hang
back far enough and let the GPS system do all the work for
them.
                                                            
 
EXT. DOWNTOWN MINNEAPOLIS - NIGHT
                                                            
Scene opens just outside the warehouse as Gerald and Jasmira
are leaving.
The van waits till Gerald and Jasmira are down a block, then
it begins to pursue.
Gerald employs a power that allows him and Jasmira not to
attract attention.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Looking over at
       Jasmira)
Are you ok with all this?
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (Looking back at
       Gerald)
In a way yes, but I can’t get my
mind off of Perry.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Serious Tone)
I am sorry about that, but Perry
is a survivor. He will spring back
from all of this a better man.
                                                            

44.

                       JASMIRA
      (looking at Gerald)
I hope so, I am so worried though,
and when he lost his cat he wasn’t
the same for a month.
                                                            
                       GERALD
We could go see him; we will need
to stay in the shadows and whisper
so as not to attract attention.
Otherwise if he saw you that could
make things difficult.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (Smiling)
Thanks Gerald, I will never forget
this. I just need to make sure he
is ok.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (waliking to the
       door)
I understand.
                                                            
 
INT. SAGAAN HOUSE - NIGHT
                                                            
Just outside Perry’s house a van is seen parking a block a
way as GERALD and JASMIRA approach the house and walk up to
the door.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Checking the door)
Jas its open.
                                                            
Jasmira and Gerald walk inside the house.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (Looking around)
He hasn’t cleaned anything!
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Putting his
       finger to his
       mouth)
Shh, Jas he has had other things
on his mind lately.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (Whispering)
Sorry. I suppose he is pretty
messed up with me being dead. That
would be devastating for me if the
            (MORE)

45.

                       JASMIRA (cont'd)
roles were reversed.
                                                            
Meanwhile outside, two teams converge on the house Alpha
team takes the front door, while bravo team takes the back
door. There are 3 people per team all decked out in night
optical gear and silenced modified weapons.
                                                            
                       AGENT SOMERS
      (Clicking his
       radio)
Alpha team go, Bravo team go!
                                                            
                       AGENT WILSON
      (Staring at the
       house)
I hope we get him quick, the boss
is getting angry. And you know
what happens when he is angry.
                                                            
                       AGENT SOMERS
      (Looking over at
       the house)
We got him, no vampire can
withstand that ammo. It’s UV in a
can.
                                                            
                       AGENT WILSON
      (Looking at Somers)
You’re over confidence worries me.
                                                            
Back in the house Jasmira and Gerald are walking through the
living room and going into the kitchen.

(The slight sound of a cocking gun)
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Grabbing Jasmira)
Get Down!
                                                            
(Whistle! Whistle! Whistle! Whistle! The sounds of breaking
glass and the two doors being kicked in)


Gerald is hit twice by white glowing ammunition; Jasmira is
hit once in the leg.
Gerald is able to take Jasmira behind the dining room table.
                                                            

46.

                       GERALD
      (Covering Jasmira)
Argg! What the hell, they are
using UV ammo. This is very bad
Jas.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (Looking up to see)
Who is? What the hell is going on!
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Looking around)
Not sure yet, but we need to get
out of here and quickly.
                                                            
                       PERRY (VO)
      (Running down the
       stairs)
Jasmira!
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Getting up)
I am to wounded to make us totally
invisible to sight, were going to
have to make a break for it. C’mon
let’s go!
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (remaining in a
       crouched position)
I need to distract these guys so
Perry doesn’t get hurt.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (looking down at
       Jasmira)
That’s not a good idea.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (looking around)
I have to try.
                                                            
Jasmira springs to her feet and runs at the front window of
the house where she spotted someone.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Shocked look)
Oh crap!
                                                            
Gerald accelerates himself and runs into the kitchen towards
the door.
                                                            

47.

Perry gets to the bottom of the stairs and sees Jasmira and
is stunned with total shock.

Jasmira runs through the room and out through the window at
the man she had spotted.

The other two agents next to the man being attacked shoot
Jasmira point blank
                                                            
Gerald with massive speed runs through the door and shoulder
slams the first agent knocking him off the porch and onto
the ground. His actual punch is a direct hit to the second
agents face, with a crunch sound the second agent falls to
the ground with a caved in skull

The third agent next to Gerald turns to point his weapon at
him.
                                                            
Gerald grabs the agent and buries his fangs into his throat.
                                                            
Jasmira being fairly wounded begins shows her fangs and her
eyes glow red as she attacks the second agent, the third
agent aims for her skull and as he shoots Perry jumps in the
way of the shot
                                                            
Gerald with great speed runs through the house and out the
front door standing between the third agent and Jasmira.
                                                            
                       AGENT
      (Aiming his weapon
       at Gerald)
Stand down leech!
                                                            
Jasmira spins around and lunges for the third agent, she
takes him down with ease as she has let out the evil within
her. Her physical appearance becomes much paler as her eyes
continue to glow like burning embers.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Looking at
       Jasmira)
Jasmira take control!
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (Her eyes retunr
       to normal as she
       looks at Gerald)
What happened? What did I just do?
      (Looking down at
       Perry's bloody
       body)
Gerald make him like us before it
            (MORE)

48.

                       JASMIRA (cont'd)
is too late!
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Cold tone)
It is already too late; the shot
went through his brain. He is dead
Jasmira. We need to leave before
the cops show up.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (Kneeling down
       next to Perry's
       body)
No no no, we need to save him!
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Grabbing Jasmira)
Its too late, lets go now!
                                                            
Scene flips to inside the van.
                                                            
                       AGENT SOMERS
      (Clicking his
       radio)
Alpha team? Bravo Team? Respond!
                                                            
                       AGENT WILSON
      (Looking at Somers)
Lets go get the bodies; we need to
get out of here.
                                                            
Agent Wilson's cell phone rings. Agent Wilson answers.
                                                            
                       ZERIKIAH (On The Phone)
Is the son dead?
                                                            
                       AGENT WILSON
      (Entering the
       house and seeing
       Perry's body)
Sorry sir, no he isn’t. We did
have an incident however.
                                                            
                       ZERIKIAH (On The Phone)
What kind of incident?
                                                            
                       AGENT WILSON
      (Looking at the
       rest of the
       carnage)
We killed a mortal; we are
cleaning it up now.
                                                            

49.

                       ZERIKIAH (On The Phone)
So now he is aware we are tracking
him, this will reflect on your
record. I want a full report in
two hours.
                                                            
Cell phone goes silent.
                                                            
                       AGENT SOMERS
      (pointing to
       another team)
Get in here and clean this place
up.
      (looking at Wilson)
Was he pissed?
                                                            
                       AGENT WILSON
      (putting away his
       phone)
Pissed is what I was hoping for,
he is down right explosive.
                                                            
                       AGENT SOMERS
      (Looking around)
Man we could get fired for this, I
have a family to support.
                                                            
                       AGENT WILSON
Well think of it this way, on one
hand we could get fired or on the
other hand the vampires could find
us and we wouldn’t have to worry
about it.
                                                            
 
INT. WAREHOUSE - NIGHT
                                                            
GERALD is changing shirts and JASMIRA seems to be in shock.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Walking over to
       Jasmira)
Jasmira, I am sorry about Perry. I
don’t know how or why they are
tracking us.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (Shaking)
Who were those guys?
                                                            

50.

                       GERALD
      (putting his hand
       on Jasmira)
I think I know whom they worked
for, a few years ago I made a few
enemies. I got into some trouble
and exposed myself lets just say
it was not a pleasant experience.
Those guys were hired assassins,
they know about us and they hunt
that which they fear.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (Looking at
       Gerald's wounds)
Your still hurt? Why? I thought we
could heal bullet wounds.
                                                            
                       GERALD
Yea I still am slightly, the type
of ammo they had was called
Phosphorus rounds.
Basically fire in a can ammo. Very
nasty to be hit by either human or
vampire.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (looking at the
       wounds on Gerald)
So fire or things that burn are
harmful to us?
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Buttoning up his
       new shirt)
Not harmful. Deadly is the word
you wanted. Normal wounds by
falling or getting hit by normal
stuff will heal fairly quickly and
not affect your hunger too much.
      (looking at
       Jasmira's leg
       wound)
Sunlight however will not only
heal slower but also make you
extremely hungry and quickly.
Other things that cause hunger are
certain vampiric powers that are
used.
                                                            

51.

                       JASMIRA
      (Sitting down
       ontop of a table)
Like the speed you use? That power
is so cool.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Sitting next to
       Jasmira)
Correct, now we have to prepare.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (Puzzled look)
Prepare? Prepare for what?
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Looking at
       Jasmira)
Those guys have to be stopped, and
I mean stopped quickly.
There are others in the city like
us. Not many but we don’t need
those hunters getting the drop on
us or anyone else.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (Looking back at
       Gerald)
I see your point.
(beat)
      (Her eyes change
       red)
Those bastards killed my husband
and I have a score to settle.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (concerned
       expression)
Careful Jasmira, don’t let the
full vampiric side take hold.
Revenge is an easy way to get
lost.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (Eyes change to
       normal)
I won’t let it take control.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Walking over to
       his backpack)
Didn’t Mouse buy a house a few
years ago?
            (MORE)

52.

                       GERALD (cont'd)
      (Pulling out a
       shotglass)
I have something for him.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (standing up)
Yes he did.
      (walking over to
       Gerald)
Nice gift, Mouse will like that.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Smiles)
Good. That’s perfect, Mouse is
phase two anyway.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (Taking the
       shotglass from
       Gerald)
Phase two?
                                                            
                       GERALD
I am trying to keep my part of a
promise we all made years ago. And
also trying to balance that with
the laws I am currently governed
by. Vampires have to be careful
who they bring across, flighty or
people easily enraged are not ones
to bring across. However I was
told by my creator that I could
bring across you for now and Mouse
later if you turned out all right.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (Turns away from
       Gerald)
In a way the power is nice, but I
would trade it all for Perry back.
This whole thing is making me so
angry, Perry didn’t deserve this.
      (Eyes become
       crimson)
None of it!
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Walking over to
       Jasmira)
Lets go see Mouse maybe that will
help.
                                                            
 

53.

INT. GSA HEADQUARTERS - NIGHT
                                                            
AGENT WILSON arrives at the GSA building and goes to
ZERIKIAH'S ofice.
                                                            
                       AGENT WILSON
      (Opening the door
       and walking into
       the office)
Sorry again sir. It won’t happen
again.
                                                            
                       ZERIKIAH
      (Getting up from
       behind his desk)
You killed a mortal. What the hell
were you thinking?
                                                            
                       AGENT WILSON
      (Standing at
       Attention)
Things happened so fast; we even
had the upper hand. I am not sure
what anyone was thinking. The
Ancient’s son is very powerful.
More powerful then most. Please
Zerikiah give me another chance.
                                                            
                       ZERIKIAH
      (Walking up to
       Wilson while
       shuffling cards)
You get one more chance, if you
fail again I will feed you to the
leeches.
      (Flipping a card)
Now get out of my sight!
                                                            
Agent Wilson leaves quickly.
                                                            
                       ZERIKIAH (VO)
      (closing his
       office door)
No wonder the leeches are able to
move about un-noticed, Mortals
can’t see the forest for the
trees. And to think there own
people pay me and this office to
kill the supernatural. It’s like
taking candy from a baby.
                                                            
Zerikiah flips 3 cards then smiles.
                                                            

54.

                       ZERIKIAH (VO)
      (Walking back to
       his desk)
If my vision is true, there will
be a large power vacuum soon, and
that will be good for us. My
superior will be very pleased when
Karloff Baronze is taken down.
                                                            
 
EXT. PARKING LOT OF MOUNT RUSHMORE - NIGHT
                                                            
It’s a stormy night and the lights that illuminate the
monument are covered in a fog. Lightning illuminates the
surrounding area every once in awhile. KARLOFF is standing
at the railing looking over at the covered monument.
                                                            
                       KARLOFF (VO)
      (Leaning against
       the railing)
The hunters are becoming
increasingly bolder in this new
age. Vampiric belief is not scary
anymore, but almost as if nature
itself is trying to make the
undead more appealing.
      (Turning around
       and walking away
       from the railing)
In the last two centuries things
have changed at an astounding
rate. I am hoping Gerald wasn’t a
mistake, because I feel he is our
last hope in this new era.
                                                            
A van pulls up into the parking lot, twelve armed men in
military uniforms scramble out of the van.
                                                            
                       KARLOFF
      (Looking very
       angry)
Fine you caught me. Now what? My
destruction? If it was that easy I
would have been dead long before
now!
                                                            
SGT WILLIAMS gets out of the van.
                                                            
                       SGT. WILLIAMS
      (Pointing at
       Karloff)
We got you now vampire! Boys fire!
                                                            

55.

                       KARLOFF
      (Chuckles)
Great make this easy.
                                                            
Karloff accelerates himself to almost subsonic speeds making
a slight sonic boom as he moves. He passes the men shooting
at him almost as if the bullets were moving too slowly to
hit him. He reaches the van and with a fast and hard jolt
from the front he flips the van onto four of the men
crushing them instantly. Williams fires her weapon after
realizing where he went, her shot clips Karloff as he slowed
for a moment after the van impact. The phos round cuts
through Karloff’s shoulder.
Karloff smiles and blurs toward Williams in a matter of
seconds he travels over a hundred yards and punches her in
the head. The force of the blow snaps her neck back and
severs her spinal column she drops in a heap. The other
seven soldiers open full auto fire in an attempt to suppress
the vampire. Karloff gets hit a number of times as he wades
through and slams into each of the soldiers knocking them
back eleven feet and to the ground in a snap and a crunch.
Karloff then feeds on the barely alive. Then walks up to
Williams.
                                                            
                       KARLOFF
      (Lookijng down at
       Williams)
You don’t understand do you? My
people and I are here to help. All
you had to do was leave us be. Now
you got the death of your men on
your conscience. Have a good
evening.
                                                            
Karloff searches Williams and finds her cell phone. He calls
an ambulance then drops the phone in her hand. Karloff then
walks to his car and drives off. Williams lies there hurting
all over as if stampeded by buffalo she begins to wonder why
he didn’t finish her off.
                                                            
Karloff gets into his car and reaches into his glove
compartment and gets his cell phone.
                                                            
                       KARLOFF
      (Pressing a speed
       dial button)
Yeah Gerald? It’s K. Look we have
had another incident I am headed
back to the twin cities so stay
there till after you see me. I
think something huge is about to
happen.
      (Beat)
            (MORE)

56.

                       KARLOFF (cont'd)
Oh you feel it too, sounds like we
have a demon on our hands then. I
will call later.
                                                            
Karloff drives away.
                                                            
 
INT. MOUSE'S HOUSE - NIGHT
                                                            
GERALD and JASMIRA are outside a quiet suburban Victorian
house. Gerald knocks on the door of the house, MOUSE answers
his door. Mouse looks as though he is crying.
                                                            
                       MOUSE
      (Wiping his eyes)
Thank god you’re here; Perry was
gunned down at his house about an
hour ago.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Looking at Mouse)
I heard about that. May I come in?
                                                            
                       MOUSE
      (Raises an eyebrow)
Not yet, first tell me how long
you have been dead? I first
noticed it at the hospital when
Jasmira died.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Surprised look)
Well since you put it that way.
About 10 years now and how did you
know?
                                                            
                       MOUSE
      (Stepping to the
       side of the
       doorway)
I see, come in then.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Steps inside)
Mind if a friend joins us?
                                                            
                       MOUSE
      (Puzzled look)
Who?
                                                            

57.

                       JASMIRA
      (Stepping into the
       doorway)
Hi Mouse.
                                                            
                       MOUSE
      (Starting to cry)
Oh thank god JAS! I am so glad
you……. well exist.
                                                            
                       GERALD
We need a place to stay before
dawn breaks. Can we crash here and
talk tonight?
                                                            
                       MOUSE
      (Excited tone)
Sure you can. I have so many
questions.
                                                            
 
INT. INSIDE A JAGUAR BY A LAKE - NIGHT
                                                            
ZERIKIAH and the MAN IN SHADOWS are sitting in a jaguar
parked by a lake.
                                                            
                       ZERIKIAH
      (Shuffling cards)
I have had visions of the
ancient’s son whereabouts.
                                                            
                       MAN IN SHADOWS
      (Looking at the
       lake)
Good, you need to take him in one
piece or we lose the advantage.
                                                            
                       ZERIKIAH
      (stops shuffling)
Take him alive?
                                                            
The MAN IN SHADOWS looks over at Zerikiah and all we see is
a pair of pale green flames where the man's eyes should be.
                                                            
                       MAN IN SHADOWS
      (Looking at
       Zerikiah)
Did I stutter?
                                                            
                       ZERIKIAH
      (Flipping a card)
Yes, I understand why now.
                                                            

58.

                       MAN IN SHADOWS
      (Looking back at
       the lake)
good.
                                                            
ZERIKIAH gets out of the Jaguar and starts walking toward a
small neiborhood. Zerikiah walks down the street playing
with his cards. Zerikiah spots a MAN sneaking out of an
alley. Zerikiah follows the man back to an apartment
building and walks in behind the man.
                                                            
                       ZERIKIAH
      (Pointing to the
       man)
Excuse me?
                                                            
                       MAN
      (Turning around)
Yeah buddy?
                                                            
                       ZERIKIAH
      (Walking closer)
Do you realize you have a problem?
                                                            
                       MAN
      (Stopping)
Problem? I don't have a problem.
                                                            
                       ZERIKIAH
      (Fanning out 3
       cards in his hand)
Yes my dear fellow. Your dead. And
will need to be put down.
                                                            
                       MAN
      (Nervous look)
What are you talking about?
                                                            
Zerikiah drops a card to the ground, the man looks down at
the card and the man’s eyes glaze over and turn to a bright
green. The man then pulls out a knife and starts cutting
himself. He then puts the knife in his eye and shoves it
back into his brain. The man falls to the ground.
                                                            
Zerikiah grabs his cards and places one on the man's chest.
The man turns to ash.
                                                            
                       ZERIKIAH
      (Looking down at
       the ash)
Such protector’s of humanity. They
die almost as easy as mortals do.
                                                            

59.

Zerikiah slips down the alley where the man had emerged
from.
                                                            
                       ZERIKIAH (VO)
      (Shuffling cards)
I would hunt them on a regular
basis but if I do that that will
declare open war. And that would
be very bad for us.
                                                            
 
EXT. NEIGHBORHOOD STREET - NIGHT
                                                            
GERALD and JASMIRA walking through a suburb. Gerald and
Jasmira are talking. The air is fairly humid and the ground
is dry.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Looking at the
       ground)
Looks like we need rain around
here. The grass is almost dead.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
Yeah, my yard was a mess, I
decided to pave it. It seems to
help, no mowing or upkeep and
extra parking. So it was a win,
win situation.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Shocked look)
You paved your yard? I guess I
didn’t really notice.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
Yeah actually Perry got some dark
green paint and tried to make it
look like grass.
                                                            
                       GERALD
This is disturbing, I have seen a
lot but a paved lawn is something
I thought I would never see.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
You know me, once I get an idea I
can’t shake it till I try it.
                                                            

60.

                       GERALD
That was one of the reasons I
wanted you to come across. It is
refreshing to see you still retain
that part of your personality.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
I think Perry would have approved,
but he didn’t need to die.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Looks at Jasmira)
I am sorry Jasmira; I don’t know
what to say. I guess all I can do
is hope you will forgive me one
day.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (Starting to cry)
The only man who understood me and
all my quirks and I let this
happen to him.
                                                            
                       GERALD
No you didn’t, the hunters are not
supposed to kill mortals, I guess
they got careless.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (Eyes narrow)
I will show them careless.
                                                            
                       GERALD
Jas, if you let the hate take
control it is a long journey back
to sanity.
                                                            
The two walk in silence for the rest of their journey back
to Mouse's house.
                                                            
 
INT. FOLLOWING EVENING AT MOUSE'S HOUSE - NIGHT
                                                            
The sun has just set, MOUSE is sitting in his living room
reading a book. The basement door opens both GERALD and
JASMIRA emerge from the doorway. They walk into the living
room talking about vampiric strength.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Walking past
       Mouse)
Evening Mouse.
                                                            

61.

                       JASMIRA
What’s up Mouse?
                                                            
                       MOUSE
      (Without looking
       up from his book
       and with a half
       hearted tone)
Hi.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Puzzled look)
Something wrong?
                                                            
                       MOUSE
      (closing his book
       and looking
       Gerald in the
       eyes)
Yes there is. I need to know if
you had anything to do with
Perry’s death.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
No! Mouse you know better then to
say something like that. Gerald
knows who is behind the killing.
                                                            
                       GERALD
Mouse you know I would never hurt
any of my friends. We were at the
house when the break in occurred
so Jas could see Perry again.
That’s when all hell broke loose
and Perry saved Jasmira.
                                                            
                       MOUSE
I had to be sure. And I suppose
you are wondering how I know
certain things that I shouldn’t.
                                                            
                       GERALD
Kind of.
                                                            
                       MOUSE
I will just say being observant
can be useful in most cases.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Puzzled look)
I guess so.
                                                            

62.

                       JASMIRA
But I can’t get those bastards out
of my mind. Perry didn’t deserve
any of that. And they messed with
the wrong Saagan.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Walking over to a
       table and
       grabbing a phone
       book)
We need to get started on the
plan.
                                                            
                       MOUSE
I am not sure how much use I will
be. I am not really a combat type
of guy.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
Your very useful, I am sure Gerald
has something you can do.
                                                            
                       MOUSE
Really? Like what?
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Looking through
       the phone book)
Actually there is a use for you.
We will need someone to walk
during the day to run errands and
such. Having a sun allergy has its
drawbacks.
                                                            
                       MOUSE
      (Sour look)
So I am like a mortal lackey to
you undead types.
                                                            
                       GERALD
No. More like a necessity for now.
We can talk about you crossing
over later if that is what you
want to do.
                                                            
                       MOUSE
      (stands up and
       walks toward
       Gerald)
I would love too. So I do the
lackey thing for a while then I
can be like you right?
                                                            

63.

                       GERALD
      (Shaking Mouse's
       hand)
Agreed.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
Lets get the plan ready, ‘cuz
those guys need to understand
something about karmic law.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (flips a page in
       the phone book)
Good idea Jas, lets get to work.
                                                            
 
INT. INSIDE GSA HQ - NIGHT
                                                            
Inside the head quarters building AGENT WILSON and AGENT
SOMERS are in agent Wilson's office with their radios in
hand. They have a map rolled out on the desk.
                                                            
                       AGENT WILSON
      (Clicking the
       radio)
Alright Alpha team lets be better
prepared. These leeches are
tougher then most.
                                                            
                       AGENT SOMERS
      (clicking his
       radio)
Does everyone have their UV
flashlights?
                                                            
                       AGENT (On the Radio)
Yes we do sir.
                                                            
                       AGENT WILSON
      (Clicking the
       radio)
Good, what about the stakes and
the grenade launchers?
                                                            
                       AGENT (On the Radio)
Yes got those too.
                                                            
                       AGENT WILSON
      (Speaking to agent
       Somers)
I hope this works. The boss is
very angry.
                                                            

64.

                       AGENT SOMERS
I know he has been in a very foul
mood since the new leech moved
back to town.
                                                            
                       AGENT WILSON
Foul is an understatement, He has
been flipping cards constantly. I
think it is a nervous habit.
                                                            
                       AGENT SOMERS
Nervous habit eh? I think he is
just plain insane from all this.
                                                            
                       AGENT WILSON
Maybe that is true but lets not
lose focus here.
      (clicking his
       radio)
Ok lets go!
                                                            
 
INT. THE NEXT NIGHT AT MOUSE'S HOUSE - NIGHT
                                                            
Mouse had gotten the supplies for the plan during the
daylight hours showing boxes and wood planks and two by
fours. Mouse is covered in sawdust, sees Gerald and Jasmira
walk through the kitchen
                                                            
                       MOUSE
      (wiping the dust
       off his brow)
Hi Gerald and Jas.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
Mouse you need a shower.
                                                            
                       MOUSE
Yes I do, did you both need a
shower before I jump in?
                                                            
                       GERALD
I can wait till after yours.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (wiping off a
       chair so she can
       sit down)
I can wait too, so it’s all yours.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Looking at the
       kite)
This is great work Mouse, you cut
            (MORE)

65.

                       GERALD (cont'd)
the wood the way I wanted it.
                                                            
                       MOUSE
Yes I did, I followed the
blueprint exactly it took me a few
tries to get it right. I finished
a little bit ago.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Moving the kite
       back and forth)
Yes, very nice this will work
nicely.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
Will the small digi cam fit on
there?
                                                            
                       GERALD
It should, it is lightweight
enough. This is the best way to
get the Arial view of the house we
need for watching their security.
                                                            
                       MOUSE
      (taking off his
       shoes)
I Think the low light cam on a
kite won’t be noticed.
                                                            
                       GERALD
My thoughts exactly.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
Lets get ready; we need to go fly
a kite.
      (beat)
Wow I never thought I would ever
hear myself say that.
                                                            
Scene shows Jasmira in the shower.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA (VO)
      (Sobbing)
Perry I hope you will be proud of
me. I miss you so much.
I am sorry for not coming to you
right away. I am sorry I wasn’t
the best wife. From now on I will
do my best to make sure what
happened to you never happens
again to anyone else.
            (MORE)

66.

                       JASMIRA (cont'd)
                                                            
Jasmira gets out of the hower and towels off, she puts on a
T-shirt and a pair of jeans and leaves the bathroom. She
stops and goes into Mouse's bedroom and opens the sliding
door that leads to the balcony.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (Leaning against
       the railing and
       watching people
       on the street)
Look at all the little living
people walking about down there.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Walking out of a
       shadow)
I thought you might come up here,
as a vampire this is a perfect
vantage point. Have your senses
heightened yet?
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (looking over at
       Gerald)
Yes, well kinda.
      (Beat)
I think. I no longer need glasses,
which is a nice plus, and I hear
heartbeats.
                                                            
                       GERALD
I don’t know what to say, my
senses were heightened almost
right away I don’t know why yours
haven’t. I know we all gain
different powers at different
stages.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
Well I know what I have.
                                                            
                       GERALD
Yeah? What is it?
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (Lifting her left
       pant leg)
I don’t cut easy, I tried to shave
and the razor broke. I normally
cut myself shaving and I think
when my skin went against the
            (MORE)

67.

                       JASMIRA (cont'd)
blade the blade gave way.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Turning for the
       sliding door)
Oh, my creator said durability
should come later. I guess you got
that one first.
      (Beat)
We should go before Mouse gets
anymore anxious.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
Gerald did you get nervous at
times with this newfound gift? Or
is it just me being me?
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Turning back
       toward Jasmira)
Well I did early on and I would
also wonder how I stacked against
others of our kind. Overwhelming
humans you will find is very easy.
But the ones like us that don’t
share our belief can cause a lot
of problems. Let me tell you a
story and maybe that will help you
to calm your nerves.
                                                            
 
EXT. FLASHBACK-- RAPID CITY STREET - NIGHT
                                                            
Just outside of the Alex Johnson hotel. It’s raining and
people on the streets are running to where they need to be
some to the hotel and some to their cars. GERALD is outside
with KARLOFF and they are standing in the rain.
                                                            
                       GERALD
You know sir I seem to be getting
some of this down I think. It
seems to be coming easier.
                                                            
                       KARLOFF
We have much more training to do.
We will be at our destination
soon. Until then I don’t want you
to get to comfortable with your
powers.
                                                            

68.

                       GERALD
I wouldn’t call this comfortable,
more like an understanding. I know
a lot of this comes with time but
in a way I think I am getting down
the basics.
                                                            
                       KARLOFF
      (Grinning)
You think so huh? Well let’s see
what you got. I think I can come
up with a test for you.
                                                            
                       GERALD
Test? Well all right I am game. Is
this going to be a test of speed
or will or something new?
                                                            
                       KARLOFF
Patience my boy. Patience.
      (Beat)
Well let’s walk over to a nice
restaurant. There you can show me
what you think you know so far.
                                                            
                       GERALD
Sounds like a plan.
                                                            
Gerald and Karloff walk a couple of blocks to a restaurant
called “The Firehouse Brewing Company”. They walk in and are
seated at the bar.
                                                            
                       KARLOFF
      (Scanning the
       crowd)
Here is the test. In here among
the humans is a third vampire.
Find him and bring him to death.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Shocked look)
What? Why?
                                                            
                       KARLOFF
He is a traitor to the cause and
needs to be dealt with. And you
seem to think you have gotten a
good enough understanding to
handle this problem. So this is
the test. Or you can admit you are
wrong and we can go.
                                                            

69.

                       GERALD
      (Looking around
       the crowd)
No we won’t leave. I am sure I can
handle this. I will start now.
                                                            
                       KARLOFF
      (Chuckles)
All right then, have a go at him
and I will see you in one form or
another in a few minutes.
                                                            
Gerald gets up from the table and begins to wander around
the restaurant. He seems to be sniffing as well as looking
carefully trying to get a sense for another that doesn’t
have a heartbeat. Gerald sees a flicker go through the
kitchen door and Gerald runs through the doors knocking a
waitress over. He sees the backdoor open and Gerald runs
outside.
                                                            
                       MAN
      (Sneering at
       Gerald)
Who are you? And why are you
looking for me? Leave me alone!
                                                            
                       GERALD
You know why I am here. Can’t you
see why we need to fight for the
humans or are you blind by power?
Don’t you want redemption?
                                                            
                       MAN
      (Laughs)
Oh I get it. You are here to try
and convince me that our salvation
lies in these humans. You are
wrong because their God is not
mine. I can’t believe I see a
Christian vampire before me. Some
paradoxes shouldn’t exist.
                                                            
                       GERALD
Call me what you will but the fact
still remains. Your Existence is
over.
                                                            
The vampire blurs and hits Gerald in the face then the blur
goes down the back alley. Gerald flies through the air and
lands near the trashcan. As Gerald starts to get up Karloff
comes around the corner of the building.
                                                            

70.

                       KARLOFF
      (Watching Gerald
       get up)
You still think you know anything
important? Or are you now
convinced that maybe you need to
really start paying attention?
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Looking at
       Karloff)
Point taken. Who the hell was that
guy? And how old is he? Because he
hits really hard.
                                                            
                       KARLOFF
Vincent has been around since the
civil war. He was a soldier for
the north and was dying on the
battlefield when his creator found
him. Vincent chose undeath over
true death in order to get some
sort of vengeance.
                                                            
Gerald and Karloff walk through the alley in the rain as a
flash of lightning switches the scene back to modern day. It
starts to drizzle.
                                                            
 
EXT. CITY NEIBORHOOD - NIGHT
                                                            
Jasmira gets ready; they all meet downstairs and take
Mouse’s car. They drive to the ghetto part of town. They
park a couple blocks from the house and walk down a half a
block and get the kite ready to fly.
                                                            
                       MOUSE
I think I can fly the kite and
watch the remote monitor. Then I
can relay all the info through the
headset.
                                                            
                       GERALD
Great. Jas lets keep our headset
on a low volume that way we won’t
be heard if someone is around.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
Ok Gerald lets go get us some
hunters. Mouse we will be back
shortly.
                                                            

71.

                       MOUSE
No problem here. Be careful you
two.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Closing his eyes
       and tilting his
       face toward the
       sky)
Seems we have a mild wind. The
kite should stay up there for a
while. If trouble comes get out of
here.
                                                            
Gerald and Mouse get the kite up in the air. Then check the
camera view and adjust as needed.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Looking at
       Jasmira)
Time to leave.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (Grabbing a light
       jacket out of the
       car)
Right behind you.
                                                            
CUT TO
                                                            
Inside of the house. ZERIKIAH and the MAN IN SHADOW are in
an upstairs bedroom.
                                                            
                       ZERIKIAH
      (Flipping a card)
Looks like the ancient’s son is on
his way here.
                                                            
                       MAN IN SHADOWS
Is he now?
                                                            
                       ZERIKIAH
Shall I get the welcome committee
ready?
                                                            
                       MAN IN SHADOWS
That will be fine. Lets show this
young blood what he is dealing
with.
                                                            

72.

                       ZERIKIAH (VO)
      (Flipping 3 cards)
The near future seems unsure, how
interesting
                                                            
                       ZERIKIAH
      (Turning for the
       door)
I shall go get the men ready.
                                                            
Zerikiah goes downstairs and prepares his remaining hunters.
He sets up the electronic traps and places a card near the
door. Then he returns upstairs and takes his position.
                                                            
CUT TO
                                                            
The camera view looks through the window showing Jasmira and
Gerald coming up behind the house. The scene flips to
Gerald’s view as he is looking up at the kite.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Talking into the
       headset)
Mouse, any guards?
                                                            
                       MOUSE (On The Headset)
The storm seems to be causing
interference. I can’t see
anything.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (looking at the
       sky)
It didn’t look this bad before.
                                                            
                       GERALD
I know, I think someone knows were
coming.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
Should we charge inside?
                                                            
                       GERALD
No. Charging into their home turf
would not be a good idea.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (Looking over at
       Gerald)
Who are these people and why the
hell are they after us?
                                                            

73.

                       GERALD
Well it started about 2 years ago.
I had just finished training.
                                                            
 
EXT. FLASHBACK-- LAS VEGAS STREET - NIGHT
                                                            
Scene focuses on a lamppost.

Gerald is leaning against a lamppost in Las Vegas he is
talking with Karloff.
                                                            
                       KARLOFF
I have taught you all I will
teach. You have studied hard and
learned quickly.
      (Beat)
I must confess I thought I might
have made a mistake. But you have
shown me I was not wrong in
bringing you across.
                                                            
                       GERALD
Thank you sire. But I have so much
more to learn.
                                                            
                       KARLOFF
In time you will learn more, you
are ready to make a new life for
yourself.
                                                            
                       GERALD
I am? I still feel so new to this.
                                                            
                       KARLOFF
That’s one of the drawbacks of
this gift. Time passes you by more
quickly then mortals. Your powers
will grow in time but you have
learned everything I am willing to
teach.
                                                            
                       GERALD
I understand sire, May I ask you
something though?
                                                            
                       KARLOFF
Please do.
                                                            
                       GERALD
The evil you talked about, we
didn’t encounter any of it.
                                                            

74.

                       KARLOFF
It hides from us; it stays in the
shadows and waits till it knows it
can strike. We wait till it does
then we strike back. The game has
been going on for centuries.
                                                            
                       GERALD
I see.
                                                            
                       KARLOFF
Let me explain things to you.
First off there are mortal hunting
groups that try to hunt us. This
was due to some reckless vampires
in the early days. That is why we
hide our feeding habits and stay
hidden as much as possible from
mortal prying eyes.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Looking very
       interested in
       what Karloff is
       saying)
Ok.. Go on.
                                                            
                       KARLOFF
We have rules that bind us from
the most ancient vampires; we are
divided into 3 groups mainly. The
group I am with and that you are
with is called “Shadow Guardian”
we are the first line of defense
versus the evil.
      (Beat)
The second group is called
“Ancient Ones” They are the 3
elders of the highest power, and
they dictate our laws.
      (Beat)
Then there is a splinter faction
of evil vampires that let the evil
within them consume their souls.
They are called “Reckoning”.
                                                            
                       GERALD
What rules am I not aware of yet
sire?
                                                            

75.

                       KARLOFF
Rule one; always cover up feeding
by using the blood in your mouth
to mix with your saliva and heal
the wound.
      (Beat)
Number two; unless extra
permission is granted only bring
across one child per hundred
years. This keeps our numbers low
so as not to be noticed and to
keep our food supply ample.
                                                            
                       GERALD
Ok that makes sense.
                                                            
                       KARLOFF
The rules must be obeyed. Remember
you have all the time in the world
no sense shortening that because
of a whim.
                                                            
                       GERALD
Very true. About these hunters?
                                                            
                       KARLOFF
Three factions of hunting groups
are in existence. First is the NSA
from the United States. The second
is the KGB. The third is called
the GSA.
                                                            
                       GERALD
GSA?
                                                            
                       KARLOFF
The Global Security Agency. They
deal in supernatural outbreaks.
They were formed by a number of
people from different countries.
                                                            
                       GERALD
I will be very careful.
                                                            
                       KARLOFF
Just be patient and don’t get
sloppy. They will never find you.
                                                            
                       GERALD
I understand sire.
                                                            

76.

CUT TO
                                                            
Gerald looks at the lamppost, the original lamppost fades
back into view it is current day.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
Wow that is a scary story. Who was
your sire anyway?
                                                            
                       GERALD
He was an ancient vampire and had
stepped down from the Ancient ones
group to take control of the
shadow guardians. But I didn’t
tell you what I did to attract
attention.
                                                            
Scene focuses back on the lamppost.
                                                            
EXT PARKING LOT
                                                            
                       GERALD (OS)
I was making my way back to the
cities; I had a nice van all
decked out with expensive toys
built into it. Including a
modification that had a sleeping
compartment for me so I could
sleep at rest stops during the
day.
      (Beat)
On my road trip I stopped into
Sioux Falls to get some food so I
drove to Falls Park in hopes of
catching some teenagers making out
or something to eat.
      (Beat)
What I didn’t realize was I was
being followed. Apparently I must
have fed on the wrong person in my
journey maybe a hunter or a
hunter’s family member.
                                                            
Gerald stops the van in a parking space and gets out of the
van. Gerald walks up to another car in the lot that has
steamy windows.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Knocking on the
       window)
Excuse me?
                                                            

77.

                       MAN (OS)
What the hell buddy! Were busy in
here go away!
                                                            
                       GERALD (VO)
By this time I looked behind me
and saw a pickup truck coming
closer I noticed on the back a guy
was standing up he was holding
onto a fifty-caliber machine gun.
By the time I saw exactly what it
was they opened fire.
      (Beat)
I used my vampiric speed and dove
over the couple’s car. Which
looking back on it wasn’t a bright
idea. But at the time I needed
cover.
                                                            
The truck gunner opens fire on anything in view.
                                                            
                       GERALD
Crap and me without a bulletproof
vest. Wait that’s a big caliber.
Shit shit!
                                                            
                       TRUCK DRIVER
      (driving around
       the car)
Die Leech!
                                                            
                       GERALD
You know we could talk about
this!?
                                                            
                       TRUCK GUNNER
      (Opening fire on
       Gerald)
Hell no Leech!
                                                            
Gerald using vampiric speed, then rolling under the car and
out the other side as the truck is going around the car
                                                            
As the truck is turning Gerald rushes he gunner by using
vampiric strength and jumping in back with the gunner.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Looking at
       himself then back
       at the gunner)
I see you missed me. Too bad I
won’t do the same.
                                                            

78.

Gerald bites the gunner and the gunner tries to fight him
off but fails as his blood is drained from his body.
                                                            
                       TRUCK DRIVER
      (Slamming on the
       trucks brakes)
Oh crap!
                                                            
Gerald flies forward by momentum and goes over the top of
the pickup and onto the hood.
                                                            
                       TRUCK DRIVER
      (Slamming on the
       accelerator)
Damn this guy is good.
                                                            
Gerald’s fingernails become larger as he uses them to hold
onto the truck and looks at the driver eye to eye.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Looking into the
       drivers eyes)
Stop the truck slowly and get out.
                                                            
The Truck driver’s eyes glaze over and he stops the truck
and gets out. Gerald gets off the hood and drains the driver
of what blood he has. Gerald then runs back to his van, he
notices blood dripping from the car he goes to the car and
opens it. The guy is half naked and dead the woman is alive
and bleeding from her arm. Gerald helps her out of the car
and stares at her.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Staring into the
       woman's eyes)
You won’t remember what happened
tonight. It is all a haze to you.
Sit down and stare into the night
sky.
                                                            
Gerald gets into his van and speeds off. Gerald’s van goes
back to a motel where he parks his van.
                                                            
EXT -OFFICE PARKING LOT -NIGHT
                                                            
                       GERALD (VO)
The whole time I was wondering how
they tracked me. I decided to rent
a small house and sell the van to
a drug dealer.
      (Beat)
I got myself a 1984 Chevy camero,
which I used as my vamp mobile; I
            (MORE)

79.

                       GERALD (cont'd)
thought every super hero needs
one. I had gotten an overnight
security job with Dakota security.
      (Beat)
And on one night in particular I
found something.
                                                            
GERALD is in the dakota Security parking lot getting into
his patrol vehicle. When ARTHUR shows up to talk to the new
recruit.
                                                            
                       ARTHUR
      (Walking up to
       Gerald's vehicle)
Hey, you must be the new guy. My
name is Arthur I work most nights
and on the west side mostly.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Checking his map)
Ah ok, well that makes things
easier I will take the east side.
                                                            
                       ARTHUR
      (pointing at a
       spot on the map)
Heh, do you get spooked easy?
There is a site on that side that
people swear is haunted.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (chuckles)
I don't spook easy. Should be
interesting my first night.
                                                            
                       ARTHUR
Just thought I would tell you.
Have fun, we break for lunch in 4
hours I will meet you at the Fryin
Grill.
                                                            
                       GERALD
Ok, I will see you there in four
hours.
                                                            
                       GERALD (VO)
So I went on my rounds it was
fairly straightforward. I
eventually got to the supposed
haunted site. And I could feel the
presence of another vampire. So I
checked out the property very
carefully.
            (MORE)

80.

                       GERALD (cont'd)
      (Beat)
I finally met up with this
creature. It turned out to be one
of the members to the group known
as “Reckoning”.
                                                            
GERALD is ambushed by HARVEY as he is looking around the
site.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Diving out of the
       way)
What the hell are you doing? If
this is what you want I will
finish this.
                                                            
                       HARVEY
      (turning to face
       Gerald)
You think I will be easy! Ha!
                                                            
Gerald sprints back to the security vehicle.
                                                            
                       HARVEY
      (Running after
       Gerald)
Coward!
                                                            
                       GERALD
No actually, just smart.
                                                            
Gerald reaches into his vehicle and pulls out a ten
thousand-candle power spotlight and turns it on in the other
vampires face.
                                                            
                       HARVEY
      (rubbing his eyes)
Ahh, I’m blind!
                                                            
Gerald uses speed and slams into the Harvey knocking him to
the ground. Gerald and Harvey wrestle around for a bit, then
Gerald sees an opening and bites into the Harvey's throat
and starts to drain him of what blood he does have. After
taking most of his blood and replenishing some of his
resources.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Standing up)
Time to go to the other side. I
hope you like Hell.
                                                            

81.

                       HARVEY
      (Weakly)
You got lucky.
                                                            
Gerald’s fingernails grow to the size of small knives and he
decapitates the enemy vampire. Gerald then gets back into
his security vehicle and drives back home to change clothes.
                                                            
 
EXT. OUTSIDE THE HUNTERS HOUSE - NIGHT
                                                            
GERALD and JASMIRA are moving very close to the house. We
see two snipers taking aim from the roof top of the house.
                                                            
                       MOUSE (On the Headset)
Two snipers on the roof!
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Pointing to the
       back door)
Go Jasmira! Now!
                                                            
Gerald and Jasmira run to the back door of the house.
                                                            
                       GERALD
You go through here I will go
around front. It’s boot party time
Jas.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (slowly opening
       the screen door)
I love boot parties.
      (Eyes turn crimson
       color)
Time to show these guys what side
of town we grew up on.
                                                            
Gerald heads around the house fading from view.
                                                            
INT -MASTER BEDROOM
                                                            
                       ZERIKIAH
      (flipping a card)
Seems they have a mortal helping
them.
                                                            
                       MAN IN SHADOWS
      (Walking to the
       door)
I shall be taking my leave. I
trust you have this matter under
control?
                                                            

82.

                       JASMIRA
      (Flipping 3 cards)
Yes sir. I do.
                                                            
INT -KITCHEN
                                                            
Jasmira who is entering the back door. Jasmira finds herself
in the kitchen.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (Sniffing the air)
I wonder where everyone went?
                                                            
At this point 3 AGENTS jump out of hiding spots and open
fire. Jasmira dives behind the kitchen table knocking it
over in the process. Pieces of the table begin to splinter
as the bullets pound on it.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (eyes blazing like
       embers)
If that’s all you got then its
time to die!
                                                            
The three agents turn on their flashlights, which are
attached to their combat webbing. Jasmira jumps up and
attacks the first agent. Her skin starts to sizzle and
smolder. The agents open fire with stray bullets flying
everywhere. Jasmira is hit multiple times but still manages
to get close enough to kick one in the groin. Continuing to
be shot she grabs a second agent and uses him as a shield as
she takes his gun and tosses him to the ground. She then
opens fire shooting the lights first then she shoots them
till they stop moving. Jasmira turns to the guy on the
ground. And breaks his light with the butt of the gun.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (Looking at the
       wounded agent)
How many more of you are there?
                                                            
                       AGENT
      (coughing)
Screw off!
                                                            
Jasmira kneels down and bites the guy on the neck and drains
him till there is nothing left to feed from and begins to
heal her wounds slowly. Two more agents rush inside the
house and take shots at Jasmira. Jasmira is able to evade
them and attack. She grabs the first one and spins him
around aims the agent's gun at the other agent then uses her
finger to press the agent's finger on the trigger making him

83.

shoot the other one. Jasmira then bites down on the agent.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (looking around)
Who trained you idiots? You guys
are so easy I guess that’s why you
picked on a poor defenseless
mortal.
                                                            
The shot agent raises his gun and shoots Jasmira in the
back. Jasmira turns around and jumps on top of the agent and
begins tearing at him.
                                                            
INT -LIVINGROOM
                                                            
Hearing gunshots he rushes into the door he sees 5 AGENTS
ready to rush the kitchen. Gerald uses his speed and punches
two in the back of the head as they are falling to the
ground he sidekick’s a third agent sending him across the
room and slamming into the wall and slumps to the ground.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (looking around
       the room)
Come on boys haven’t you seen a
real vampire before?
                                                            
The other two open fire but with Gerald’s speed they only
seem to wing him a couple of times. Gerald at this point
closes on one punching him in the chest (the sound of
breaking bones) Gerald then spin kicks the second guy in the
stomach sending him bent over into a wall. Three more guys
come rushing down the stairs guns blazing.
                                                            
Gerald still using his speed dives behind a couch and rolls
to his feet in a crouched position. The agents continue to
the main floor and take defensive positions. Gerald now
composed speeds up again and jumps over the couch and lands
in front of one of them. The other two shoot Gerald with
direct hits to the chest and leg. Gerald grabs the one in
front and throws him into another agent then moves to the
third agent snap kicking him in the knee. The agent falls to
the ground in massive pain. As the other two try to scramble
to their feet. Gerald moves at them before they can blink
and punches the second guard in the face. The last agent
shoots Gerald in the head but it seems to glance off the
side of his head. Gerald kicks him in the chest sending him
to the stairs with a crunch. Gerald begins healing his
wounds at a rapid rate.
                                                            

84.

                       GERALD
Number one when dealing with
vampires use phos rounds. Number
two you should have had your
flashlights on.
      (Beat)
You guys seem green to me. Looks
like you all need a hospital; I
will see what I can do about that
in a little while.
                                                            
Gerald feeds from one of them. Then walks into the kitchen.
                                                            
INT -MASTER BEDROOM
                                                            
                       ZERIKIAH
I am surrounded by idiots! Those
guys were barely trained.
      (Looking over at a
       woman dressed in
       body armor)
Sandra show them the door.
                                                            
                       SANDRA
      (Walking toward
       the bedroom door)
Yes sir.
                                                            
Sandra leaves the room.
                                                            
 
INT. HUNTER HOUSE KITCHEN - NIGHT
                                                            
Scene opens with JASMIRA biting into a agent’s throat. She
seems to be ripping and shredding his flesh as she feeds
from him.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
Damn! I hate getting shot.
                                                            
Jasmira looks at the mortally wounded agent.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (Crouching down
       next to the agent)
Seems your bullets don’t affect me
like they did my husband.
      (Beat)
You bastards deserve worse then
torture. Death is too easy.
                                                            

85.

Gerald catches up to Jasmira in the kitchen and looks around
at the carnage. Blood everywhere and dying or dead agents.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Talking calmly)
Jasmira you have to stop. I know
why you’re doing this, but you
need to show self-control. These
are not the same guys who killed
Perry.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (Raising her
       eyebrow at Gerald)
Doesn’t matter, they work for the
same people.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Reaching out for
       Jasmira)
Jasmira listen. If you let the
evil consume you, you will be no
better then they are.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (Backing away)
Look Gerald. I didn’t ask for
this! And because of it Perry is
dead.
      (Beat)
Their blood is on your hands not
mine. You created me and the
problem. Now you fix it!
                                                            
Gerald sighs.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (pointing her
       finger at Gerald)
This is far from easy. I have to
deal with losing my family, while
you talk about a promise. Gerald
when we were kids none of us
thought this shit was real.
      (Beat)
How dare you take my death from
me? If I were meant to be alive I
would not have had the accident.
So instead the reaper chose Perry
to take my place since you forced
me to cheat death.
      (Beat)
            (MORE)

86.

                       JASMIRA (cont'd)
You bastard, if we get out of this
I will never talk to you again.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Backs up)
I understand.
                                                            
                       GERALD (VO)
It doesn’t work that way my dear
friend, hopefully you will regain
your senses when this is over.
                                                            
As Gerald and Jasmira slowly creep up the stairs to the
second floor. They are met by Sandra.
                                                            
                       SANDRA
      (Pointing her 40
       mm grenade
       launcher at
       Jasmira)
Well you two are a pair of clever
little leeches. I must admit I am
impressed. Now try to combat a
real hunter.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (sneering at
       Sandra)
Seems you have the advantage here.
Somehow you are able to keep me
from reading you.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (shaking her head)
Read her? Lets just get this over
with!
                                                            
Jasmira rushes toward Sandra.
                                                            
Sandra moves at a blurring speed then shoots her gun twice.
The first shot hits Jasmira dead center of the chest,
knocking Jasmira over the railing and onto the first floor.
The second shot Gerald attempts to avoid using his own speed
but gets hit in the leg with a thunderous boom. Part of
Gerald’s leg is mangled.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (wincing)
Damn that hurts! You bitch!
                                                            

87.

                       SANDRA
      (smiling)
Now Gerald your not the only
vampire in existence.
                                                            
Gerald concentrates and lunges for Sandra knocking her to
the floor. They begin to bite and beat each other. Sandra
uses the grenade launcher and hits Gerald in the head with
it. Gerald grabs her gun hand and knocks the grenade
launcher down the stairs.
Sandra escapes Gerald’s grasp and gets to her feet. As
Gerald is getting to his feet Sandra blurs again this time
doing a couple punches to Gerald’s mid section and a front
kick to his face, knocking Gerald back 3 feet. Gerald
attempts a sidekick at Sandra but fails as she grabs his leg
and brings her elbow down on his knee. With a crunch she
throws Gerald against a wall and does a round house kick to
his head.
                                                            
Gerald at this point is beaten down heavily and can barely
move. Sandra grabs Gerald’s head.
                                                            
                       SANDRA
      (Crushing Gerald's
       skull)
What a waste of Vampiric power.
                                                            
Gerald's skull is about to split under the intense pressure
then all the the sudden. "BOOM! BOOM!"
                                                            
                       JASMIRA (OS)
I agree. What a waste.
                                                            
Screen moves to show Jasmira at the top of the stairs with a
hole in her chest holding the grenade launcher. The shots
hit Sandra once in the chest and once in the head. Jasmira
then rushes Sandra and bites into her throat. Sandra dazed
and heavily wounded tries to push off Jasmira as Gerald
latches onto her leg and bites down. Sandra falls to the
floor and turns to ash. Gerald closes his eyes and the scene
shows Gerald’s wounds close. Jasmira is holding her chest
and the charred wound closes shut leaving a nasty scar.
Gerald and Jas are sitting just at the top of the stairs.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (looking at
       Jasmira)
I thought you were dead; those
Phos rounds normally cut us down
quickly. The durability is very
potent in you.
                                                            

88.

                       JASMIRA
The grenade exploded and I thought
I was going to die, but it stopped
at my ribcage and all it did was
wind me for a minute and made me
very hungry.
                                                            
                       GERALD
I know what you mean, I am starved
too. We may need to find some
guards soon.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
I think I heard someone down in
the kitchen checking out the
bodies.
                                                            
                       GERALD
Lets get back down there.
                                                            
Gerald and Jasmira creep up on two guards who are stripping
armor and weapons off of bodies. Gerald takes one and
Jasmira takes the other they feed. Gerald lets his slump to
the ground. Jasmira seems to feed slightly longer as the
guard goes limp.

Gerald watching just sighs.
                                                            
EXT -MOUSE'S CAR -NIGHT
                                                            
A car pulls up behind MOUSE. Mouse turns and sees two AGENTS
getting out of the car.
                                                            
                       MOUSE
      (scratching his
       head)
Howdy guys, what brings you by
here on a nasty evening like
tonight?
                                                            
                       AGENT
      (Getting out of
       the car)
Who the hell are you? And what are
you doing?
                                                            
                       MOUSE
      (pulling on the
       kite string)
Name is Steven, and I am flying a
kite trying to see if Ben Franklin
was doing it right.
                                                            

89.

                       AGENT
Yea buddy, come with us.
                                                            
Mouse stares at one of them and gets a wild look in his eye.
The GSA agent turns on his partner and shoots him with his
side arm. Mouse then issues a command to sleep. The Agent
lies down on the ground and begins to sleep. Mouse grabs a
bag and some yarn. He starts chanting and the yarn wraps
itself around the agent’s arms and legs. Mouse then stuffs
the bag in his mouth and put him in the back of the agent’s
car.
                                                            
 
INT. HUNTER HOUSE - NIGHT
                                                            
GERALD and JASMIRA have just finished regenerating their
wounds. Gerald fiddles with the headset.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Talking into the
       headset)
Mouse you there?
                                                            
                       MOUSE (On The Headset)
Yea? Gerald you there? The storm
is pretty bad I thought I heard
shots inside the house but the
thunder is bad out here. So I
wasn’t sure.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Talking into the
       headset)
Keep look out, if you see cops or
anything radio me. Then get out of
here. Ok?
                                                            
                       MOUSE (On The Headset)
Sure thing. I think I handled some
goons from the house.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (talking into the
       headset)
Good job Mouse, keep looking out
though. There may be more coming.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
I feel a lot better.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Looking at
       Jasmira)
You look a lot better. Shall we
            (MORE)

90.

                       GERALD (cont'd)
continue?
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
I am ready when you are.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Talking into the
       Headset)
Mouse were going to do another
sweep, keep your eyes open.
                                                            
                       MOUSE (On The Headset)
Good luck. Out.
                                                            
INT -MASTER BEDROOM
                                                            
                       ZERIKIAH
      (flipping a card)
They killed Sandra. That is
disturbing; the ancient’s son is
stronger then most.
I must admit I didn’t think he
would have survived. I know I am
to take him alive but this kid
needs to be taught a lesson not to
mention he is ruining a lot of
things for me.
      (Beat)
Now to show them what i am.
                                                            
Zerikiah lays out his cards in a circle around the bed.
Zerikiah still has 6 cards in his hand.
                                                            
INT -UPSTAIRS HALLWAY
                                                            
GERALD and JASMIRA searching rooms upstairs. They come to a
far back bedroom and open it. Inside they see ZERIKIAH with
cards in a circle on the floor and he is playing with 6
cards on the bed.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
      (looking at
       Zerikiah)
You have to be kidding me, first
we see inept guards.
      (Beat)
Then we see a nasty vampire who
dies easy to her own weapon.
      (Beat)
Now we have a card-playing guy.
What’s next dancing elephants?
                                                            

91.

                       GERALD
      (Sniffing)
Hold on Jas, there is something
wrong here. I don’t sense him at
all. He isn’t human.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
Whatever!
                                                            
Jasmira charges Zerikiah.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Trying to grab
       Jasmira)
Jasmira! No!
                                                            
                       ZERIKIAH
      (Flipping a card)
You should have listened to him
Jasmira. Your mind isn’t focused,
that is excellent.
                                                            
Jasmira stops and turns to look at Gerald her eyes are a
bright glowing green.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Looking at
       Zerikiah)
Who the hell are you?
                                                            
                       ZERIKIAH
Let me introduce myself, I am
Zerikiah Allistor the lead hunter
for the GSA. We have been watching
you and your sire for some time
now. But you won’t be around long
enough to tell him.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Glancing over to
       Jasmira)
Well since I am to die. Tell me
one last thing. Why are you
hunting me? Is it my charm or wit?
Or just because you feel like it?
                                                            
                       ZERIKIAH
      (smiling)
That is an easy question. We have
been tracking your sire for over
200 years. It is a long-term
hatred between us.
                                                            

92.

                       GERALD
      (Taking a small
       step forward)
200 years? The GSA hasn’t been
around that long.
                                                            
                       ZERIKIAH
That is true. The GSA recruited
the few members of us that have
been looking for him. Using their
resources we have been able to
watch him closely. See we have an
old score to settle and now it is
time to pay the piper.
                                                            
                       GERALD
I get it now. So because he
brought me across you wish to
destroy me to see if he acts with
revenge then pick him off while he
isn’t safe anymore.
                                                            
                       ZERIKIAH
      (Flipping a card)
Exactly. What a smart boy you are.
It is a shame you need to be
sacrificed but it is for the
greater evil you do this thing.
Now enough talk. It is time.
                                                            
Jasmira rushes Gerald. Gerald uses his speed and avoids her
attack. Gerald sidekicks Jasmira in the back sending her
into the wall.
                                                            
                       GERALD
Jasmira! Snap out of it!
                                                            
Jasmira spins around her eyes are that of pure evil.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
You had Perry killed! Now you will
pay for your crime!
                                                            
Jasmira lunges for Gerald grabbing his shirt. Gerald tries
to get her off of him but her determination and strength
seem not to be hers. Jasmira punches Gerald in the face
making Gerald’s head snap back then she grabs him and bites
down. Gerald screams! He uses some speed and focuses on
throwing her off of him. He shoves her and she flies off and
lands near the window. As Jasmira stands to her feet Gerald
runs and jump kicks Jasmira out the 3rd floor window and she
lands on the patio in the back of the house.
                                                            

93.

                       ZERIKIAH
      (Shuffles his 6
       cards)
Impressive. You show great
physical prowess. To bad it won’t
help.
                                                            
Gerald speeds up and lunges for Zerikiah as he gets near the
bed one of the cards zaps him. He flies back against the
door partially going through it.
                                                            
                       ZERIKIAH
      (Turns a card so
       Gerald can see it)
That must have hurt. Now it’s my
turn whelp!
                                                            
Zerikiah flips another card then stares at Gerald, Gerald is
engulfed in flames. The fire doesn’t seem to burn anything
other then Gerald as his flesh starts to boil and melt off
his muscle tissue.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Getting out of
       the door)
Ah! It burns!
                                                            
The cards on the floor zap Gerald again sending him into a
wall. He is halfway in the wall with his back in the next
room so only his legs one arm and head are exposed to
Zerikiah. Gerald continues to burn from the fire.
                                                            
                       ZERIKIAH
      (Shuffling his
       cards)
Now fry like a good little
vampire. And give my regards to
Sandra.
                                                            
Mouse barges through the broken door.
                                                            
                       MOUSE
      (looking over at
       Gerald)
Gerald? Oh crap!
                                                            
                       ZERIKIAH
What do we have here? And who
might you be?
                                                            

94.

                       MOUSE
They call me Mouse. Now stop
hurting Gerald!
                                                            
                       ZERIKIAH
      (Laughing)
Stop me Mouse.
                                                            
Mouse stares into Zerikiah’s eyes and the flames around
Gerald stop. Gerald seems to be freeing himself from the
wall.
                                                            
                       ZERIKIAH
You have a strong will Michael
Roarke. Too bad you have a leech
for a friend otherwise I would
have recruited you.
                                                            
                       MOUSE
As do you. Should I call you
Zerikiah or Allistor?
                                                            
                       ZERIKIAH
      (Laughs)
Nice try little mage.
                                                            
Both Zerikiah and Mouse lock gaze and they both glaze over.
Mouse begins to sweat and shake. Mouse screams in pain.
Gerald after freeing himself lunges for Zerikiah. The cards
do nothing this time as Zer and Mouse are engaged in a
battle of will. Gerald uses all of his might and punches
Zerikiah in the face with a sound of crunch and break.
Gerald then bites Zerikiah in the throat and begins sucking
to help aid in healing his burns. Zerikiah’s eyes return to
normal and throws Gerald off of him. Mouse uses his last bit
of strength to distract Zerikiah mentally. Gerald jumps back
to his feet then speeds up and side kicks Zerikiah’s head.
With a snap you hear Zerikiah’s neck break.

Mouse slumps to the floor, blood is coming out his ears.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Picking Mouse up)
Mouse are you going to be ok?
                                                            
                       MOUSE
My entire body hurts. I think I
need to sleep for a day or two.
                                                            

95.

                       GERALD
You got it buddy, lets go get
Jasmira. Then get the hell out of
here.
                                                            
                       MOUSE
Sounds like a great idea.
                                                            
                       GERALD
Not a problem my friend. I owe you
one.
                                                            
Gerald puts Mouse over his shoulder and looks back at
Zerikiah’s body.
                                                            
                       GERALD
The score is settled.
                                                            
Gerald walks out of the room with mouse in tow and leaves
the house.
                                                            
 
EXT. BACK YARD OF THE HUNTERS HOUSE - NIGHT
                                                            
Gerald and Mouse are outside helping Jasmira up from the
patio. Jasmira has a crack in the back of her skull and
physically looks ill.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
I hurt everywhere. You really know
how to show a girl a good time.
                                                            
                       GERALD
I am sorry about that, but I had
no other choice, I didn’t want to
kill you.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
Thank you. But I really need
something to drink.
                                                            
                       GERALD
We better go feed far from here. I
see flashing lights pulling up.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
You lead the way.
                                                            
Gerald, Jasmira and Mouse leave quickly and get away before
the cops are swarming the house.
                                                            

96.

INT -MASTER BEDROOM
                                                            
Inside the house as the police are checking all the rooms.
They enter the master bedroom.
                                                            
                       POLICE SERGEANT
What the hell was this?
                                                            
                       DETECTIVE
Looks like a drug lab with all the
weapons they got around here.
                                                            
                       POLICE SERGEANT
      (Picking up a card
       off the ground)
Sure does.
                                                            
The Sergeant’s eyes glow green for a second.
The Sergeant gathers all the cards and walks down stairs.
He goes to his car and gets his cell phone.
                                                            
                       POLICE SERGEANT
      (Flips a card)
Put me through to headquarters.
(Beat)
I am bringing back some evidence
that could link us to this matter.
                                                            
The car drives off down a street. The scene pans up to a
kite in a tree waving in the wind of the storm.

The Sergeant drives to the main GSA building he goes to the
front desk.
                                                            
INT -GSA HQ
                                                            
                       POLICE SERGEANT
      (Hold out the
       cards)
Hey buddy; do you know whom these
cards belong too?
                                                            
                       SECURITY GUARD
      (Taking the cards)
Let me take a look, they seem
familiar.
                                                            
The security officer takes a card and his eyes glow green.
                                                            

97.

In a daze the sergeant slumps to the ground almost as if he
ran a marathon.
                                                            
The Security Guard takes out his side arm and shoots the
police sergeant in the head.
                                                            
The security guard takes the elevator upstairs and goes to
Agent Wilson’s office, Agent Wilson is sitting there waiting
for a report and notices the guard walk in.
                                                            
                       SECURITY GUARD
The boss is dead and that makes
you in charge. So take these cards
we found at the scene.
                                                            
                       AGENT WILSON
He’s really dead? Finally! Now I
can run things MY way.
                                                            
Agent Wilson takes the cards and his eyes turn green.
                                                            
                       AGENT WILSON
      (Zerikiah's tone)
Your way you say. I think not.
                                                            
Agent Wilson stares at the guard the guard almost looks
robotic as he mindlessly walks back to the elevator and goes
back to his post.
                                                            
                       AGENT WILSON
      (Dialing on the
       office phone)
Hello it’s me Allistor, Zerikiah
is dead but I will be in the right
hands position when he takes
control.
                                                            
                       MAN IN SHADOWS (On The Phone)
I assume the son of the ancient
escaped yet again?
                                                            
                       AGENT WILSON
      (Speaking into the
       phone)
Yes he did, I will not
underestimate him again.
                                                            
                       MAN IN SHADOWS (On The Phone)
Good to hear.
                                                            
 

98.

EXT. CITY ALLEY - NIGHT
                                                            
GERALD, JASMIRA and MOUSE walking through an alley on the
way back to Mouse’s house. Jasmira looks a lot better and
Gerald doesn’t have as many burns.
                                                            
                       GERALD
I never thought I would see so
many hunters in one place.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
Well they were easy, so it really
didn’t matter.
                                                            
                       GERALD
Jas you have to try to control
yourself. The power you have can
corrupt if not controlled.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
I will work on it ok. I just need
some time.
                                                            
                       GERALD
Ok, still friend’s right?
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
Yeah. Cause I am NOT calling you
daddy.
                                                            
They all chuckle.
                                                            
                       MOUSE
You guys thought this was easy? I
would hate to see hard.
                                                            
                       GERALD
Well I have to admit, the little
guys were easy but not the major
players.
                                                            
                       JASMIRA
Are you sure we are rid of them.
                                                            
                       GERALD
Oh, we are not rid of them. They
will continue to hunt us and that
is just something we learn to live
with.
                                                            

99.

                       MOUSE
This stuff sounds very dangerous;
maybe I should take a more support
role next time.
                                                            
                       GERALD
      (Chuckles)
Alright Mouse, you can be support
and guard our backs from way back.
                                                            
                       MOUSE
Like you two need guarding, what’s
going to kill you?
                                                            
                       GERALD
You Never Know.
                                                            
                       GERALD (VO)
The things humanity hates most is
what it fears, this is something
that as a mortal I didn’t see as a
problem.
      (Beat)
Now as something people don’t
understand or misinterpret I see
things in a whole new light.
      (Beat)
Jasmira needs training and Mouse
needs a drink. So my story ends
with something my creator Karloff
said to me when I first came
across those years ago.
      (Beat)
"All of us have a dark side; with
great power that darkness grows in
strength. For those of us that
have such power. It is a constant
struggle to contain The Evil
Within."
                                                            
EXT -FRONT OF THE HUNTER HOUSE
                                                            
KARLOFF and ARCHONOS are across the street from the police
barracade. They are talking and watching.
                                                            
                       KARLOFF
Gerald will be fine now, seems he
has his power under control.
                                                            

100.

                       ARCHONOS
Looks as though you picked a good
one this time K. However he did
bring another across without
permission of the elders.
                                                            
                       KARLOFF
That is true but our numbers are
low and he can trust her.
                                                            
                       ARCHONOS
He can trust her? What about us?
This isn’t something to take
lightly.
                                                            
                       KARLOFF
Come on Archonos. He has a knack
for this and I do trust his
judgment. That is something I
never really did before but Gerald
has proven himself.
                                                            
                       ARCHONOS
If you say so. But what will he do
with the mortal? The evil has its
down points where thirty to fifty
years pass. Looks as though there
adventure is over for now.
                                                            
                       KARLOFF
If I did anything right, it was
teaching Gerald how to tap into
the demonic mind and track them
down. So their adventure isn’t
over. It has just begun.
                                                            


THE END


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From Rhiannon Newkirk Date 12/22/2005 *
The screenplay was very difficult to wade through with all the spelling and grammatical errors. They broke up what little flow the plot did have, and even a work in progress should have been better proofread than this before being posted. The plot was disjointed and choppy. This feels like a prologue, not a full length screenplay. The teaser stated that vampires are supposed to try and redeem themselves and protect the world from demons and other evil. No where in the story does that really come out, except at the end and that is fairly vague. It would be more impacting if instead of Karloff telling Gerald about the evil he must face, the viewers got to see the evil in action before the last few scenes. Just saying something is evil is not nearly as grabbing as showing just how evil they really are. Character development was nil. Very little is known about the characters, except perhaps where they live and what gender they are. Are they old, young, middle aged, black, white, Asian? Are they rich, poor, middle class? We know that Gerald is unemployed, yet people keep calling him “preppy”, which generally leads one to think affluent. Did he have money before or is he just a snazzy dresser? I find it very hard to relate to characters when I can’t get a feel for where they are coming from. Granted in an actual movie, you can see the characters and that will fill in some of the gaps. But on paper they seem very cardboard. More background about the characters would be interesting. We get only a glimpse into Gerald’s past with his ex girlfriend, but that doesn’t add any depth to who he is. Why did they break up? Why should we care that they broke up? Is it relevant to the storyline? If it’s not, why was it even mentioned? If Karloff thinks humanity is doomed, why is he helping them? Because he has to? Because it’s the right thing to do, no matter how futile? There is a very fine line between mysterious and just downright vague. The same thing is true with Jasmira. For someone who was just told she could never see her husband again, she was remarkably ok with that, other than wanting to take one more quick peek at him. And, work on the grieving wife scenario. Unless being a vampire robs you of that humanity, she took her husband being violently killed in front of her rather well, other than a few tears and a cry for vengeance. And if that’s the case that they do lose something, you need to explain that in more detail. And please…please, find a better way to showcase her durability than the razor scene. Have her block a sword with her arm, hit by a car, a house fall on her…anything else, but her razor breaking. Much of the dialogue is awkward and very stiff, in many places it does not flow at all. Try saying the lines out loud, or better yet, have other people try and read them out loud. This feels like the bare bones of a screenplay and you need to flesh it out.

From Rona Parent Date 12/19/2005 ****
I have learned through the years to read everything with a fresh set of eyes, and not TRY to look for similarities in anything to other things. A vampire is a vampire just as a rose is a rose...every vampire story will be similar to others as the myths they were started from vary only by translation from the languages in which the original myths were from. A Unicorn for example, varies slightly in appearance from country to country if the locals are asked their opinions, however, every one will agree it is an equine type creature with a single horn on it's head. What I am getting at is that I find the previous posts to be not very constructive in their criticism as most are only saying it sounds like something else.....well, of course it does...it's a story about vampires, and as I said previously, a vampire is a vampire is a vampire. I personally find the story engaging. I wanted more to read at the end, which is not a lot to ask as vampires are virtually immortal (in every version of every story about them ever told). I connected with the main characters "almost" like they were people that I knew. Perhaps a little more detail there could not hurt though. Get yourself a good grammar and spell checking program and I find you are all set. If I had the means to produce it, I would make it a movie myself and not have to wait around for someone else with a fresh set of eyes to see the screenplay and agree with me.

From S.M. Krause Date 11/22/2005 *
To steal an idea is not an original script, it's a ploy to market yourself as a screenwriter and this is where you fail at. The script has cheesy dialogue that seems like it was pulled from a bad porn movie, while the action and whatever suspense you've put in fails to live up to the hype. A horror movie is supposed to scare people. this one wonders why the evil isn't within this script.

From Tobias Moran Date 11/14/2005 **
I liked your story, although I couldn't help but be reminded of "Blade"...Make sure you keep an eye on your punctuation. In your descritption headers, I was lost several times and had to re-read. Also, your first 20 pages didn't really grab me. That's key to sucking in and maintaining your audience. Keep up the good work.

From Julio Weigend Date 11/13/2005 **1/2
This has Anne Rice written all over it, man. Combined with a few pieces of RPG videogames plots. I could tell instantly you were inspired not so much by her books, but by the 2002 film Queen of The Damned. In my opinion your screenplay showed that kind of vibe. It's not so original, but hey it wasn't bad. It did turned out a bit boring at certain parts, though. So there's a big 2.5 for your effort. I can tell why no one is reading it, because your story looks like(for lack of a better term)nothing else than a rip-off.


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