Home Screenwriting Products Screenwriter Community Screenwriting Store
ScriptBuddy - Screenwriting Software for the Web

Screenwriter Community

Back to List of Published Screenplays
View/Leave Feedback

Hard to Explain (Pilot)
by Riley Connors (rileyatc13@yahoo.com)

Rated: R   Genre: Comedy   User Review: ***
Wes Walcott is currently the world's most famous magician and a major pop culture icon. But when he finally gets tired of the razzle dazzle of showbiz, he'll find that sometimes the most enjoyable things in life aren't catered.


This screenplay is copyrighted to its author. All rights reserved. This screenplay may not be used or reproduced without the express written permission of the author.



HARD TO EXPLAIN (PILOT)

FADE IN:

INT. WES'S BEDROOM - DAY
                                                            
Open to a large bedroom, covered in framed posters of
musicians and public figures (David Bowie, Malcolm X). There
is a large bed with silk sheets in the center of the room.
Everything is messy.

WES WALCOTT, 26, tall, skinny, very handsome, erratic, is in
his underwear, his legs tucked into a mahogany desk, his
head asleep atop it.

CINDY, 22, blond, beautiful, ditzy and tempermental,
standing in front of him, dressed in a vintage concert
t-shirt that clearly belongs to WES.
                                                            
                       WES
      (Confused)
Hey, uh...
                                                            
                       CINDY
Cindy.
                                                            
                       WES
Cindy, what time is it?
                                                            
                       CINDY
Somewhere around five thirty.
                                                            
WES wipes the remaining cocaine off his face.
                                                            
                       WES
Wow. I don't remember too much of
the last couple of hours, but did
you have a nice time?
                                                            
                       CINDY
Yeah, of course. You are
fantastic.
                                                            
                       WES
So I've heard.
                                                            
WES stands up from his desk and puts on a pair of jeans. He
picks up CINDY'S dress and throws it to her.
                                                            
                       CINDY
      (Close)
Are you taking me to dinner?
                                                            

2.

                       WES
You know, I would. But I've got
some work related thing tonight.
                                                            
CINDY puts on her dress.
                                                            
                       CINDY
You didn't say that at the bar.
                                                            
                       WES
What bar?
                                                            
                       CINDY
The bar at Applebee's...?
                                                            
                       WES
We met at an Applebee's?! Well
that's something I can cross off
my bucket list.
                                                            
                       CINDY
Do you remember anything?
                                                            
                       WES
Not really... It's kind of like
that "previously on..." thing they
have on TV shows. I only remember
bits and pieces, but they seem
important, like they're going to
matter later.
                                                            
CINDY flips her hair and stands in front of WES.
                                                            
                       CINDY
Are you at least going to call me?
                                                            
                       WES
Did I ask for your number?
                                                            
CINDY takes a step back.
                                                            
                       CINDY
      (Angry)
What the hell does that mean?
                                                            
WES leans back on his desk.
                                                            
                       WES
I'm pretty sure I never asked for
your number. If I wanted to see
you again, I would've asked for
it.
                                                            

3.

                       CINDY
Why don't you want to see me
again?
                                                            
                       WES
Do you want me to use a cop out?
"It's not you... It's me?"
                                                            
CINDY starts crying.
                                                            
                       WES
Really?
                                                            
                       CINDY
You piece of shit! You used me!
Like I was some piece of meat!
                                                            
                       WES
      (Under his breath)
I don't think meat comes with
silicone...
                                                            
                       CINDY
Fuck you!
                                                            
WES leans forward off the desk.
                                                            
                       WES
Really? Fuck me? You know and I
know you wouldn't have even looked
in my general direction if I
wasnt, well, "me".
                                                            
                       CINDY
You don't know that!
                                                            
                       WES
      (Smug)
Yeah, I do.
                                                            
CINDY storms out.
                                                            
                       WES
Add me on Facebook!
                                                            
                       CINDY
      (OS)
Fuck you!
                                                            
                       WES
Yeah, I heard you.
                                                            

4.

WES walks over to his closet, opens it, and grabs a hand vac
from the corner. He sucks up what appears to be cocaine from
the floor underneath the desk. He pauses, hearing a sound
from downstairs.
                                                            
                       WES
      (Whisper)
Ten... Nine... Eight... Seven...
Six... Five... Four... Three...
Two... One...
                                                            
CINDY storms back into WES'S bedroom.
                                                            
                       CINDY
Where are my keys?! Where did you
put them?!
                                                            
                       WES
Don't ask me. I keep my hands to
home.
                                                            
                       CINDY
      (Frantic)
I'm going to call the police!
                                                            
                       WES
And tell them what? You slept with
a guy an hour or two after meeting
him? I don't think that breaks any
laws. I mean, besides common
decency.
                                                            
                       CINDY
I'll tell them you're holding me
against my will! You stole my
keys!
                                                            
                       WES
      (Laughing)
And I thought I was the one on
drugs.
                                                            
                       CINDY
      (Close)
Where did you put them?!
                                                            
WES scratches his chin and sniffs.
                                                            
                       WES
Check under your side of the bed.
                                                            
CINDY reaches under the side of the bed she was sleeping on.
She finds the keys and looks up at WES, who shrugs.
                                                            

5.

                       WES
Blame the intuition on experience.
                                                            
                       CINDY
You're unbelievable...
                                                            
                       WES
Something I've also heard.
                                                            
                       CINDY
I'm leaving!
                                                            
                       WES
Promise? Because last time, well,
that was just false advertising.
                                                            
CINDY leaves WES'S bedroom. WES takes his phone from his
pocket, checks the time and sets it down on his desk. He
walks over to his still open closet and puts on a red long
sleeve button up shirt and a black vest. He swaps his jeans
for dress slacks to match the vest. His phone starts to
ring. Wes stands up to answer it.
                                                            
                       WES
Hello? (Pause) Hi, Scotty. (Pause)
Yeah, I know about the interview.
(Pause) Why does it have to be so
damn late? (Pause) Since when is
there such thing as a late night
radio interview? (Pause) Scotty,
who the fuck still listens to FM
radio on purpose if the DJ isn't
Ryan Seacrest? (Pause) Well I
don't think they would if they had
a choice. (Pause) Alright, I'll
see you in ten...
                                                            
WES walks back over to his closet and stares at his shoe
rack. It's practically empty, he has the choice between a
ratty pair of old Converse sneakers, or nice, matching dress
shoes. WES reaches for the dress shoes, but at the last
second he diverts his hand towards the Converse and picks
them up. He puts them on and walks towards his kitchen.
                                                            
 
INT. WES'S KITCHEN - DAY
                                                            
The kitchen is extremely messy. Cereal boxes everywhere,
several open, unfinished soda and beer cans. Wes pours
himself a cup of coffee. He looks at it idly then reaches at
a cabinet above him and grabs a half empty bottle of
whiskey. He pours some of it into his coffee and swishes it
around. A little bit spills off the side of the cup and onto

6.

his counter.

He reaches behind him and grabs a magazine with his face on
the cover with the headline "Wes Walcott: The Magic World's
Dangerous New Wildcard". He uses it to mop up the spill and
throws it away. He sips his spiked coffee, muttering to
himself. WES turns on his small kitchen television, flipping
through the channels. He stops at an entertainment news
program with the headline "Rumor Patrol" with a picture of
WES and an attractive model.
                                                            
                       WES
They're like... Best selling
fiction writers...
                                                            
SCOTTY STEPHENSON, 39, short, red haired, slightly pudgy,
neurotic and schedule focused, walks in. WES looks slightly
unhappy to see him.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Most of those tabloid journalists
want to be best sellers, so it's a
good start.
                                                            
WES seems to have ignored the comment.
                                                            
                       WES
      (Annoyed)
Knocking, Scotty... It's worked
pretty well in the past.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
It's not like you were
masturbating...
                                                            
                       WES
How would you know? You don't know
how I do it, do you?
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
You didn't take your belt off.
                                                            
WES looks down at his belt, then back up at SCOTTY.
                                                            
                       WES
You don't have to take your belt
off.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
You're not crafty enough to use
the weiner slot.
                                                            

7.

                       WES
      (Humbled)
Touche.
                                                            
SCOTTY walks up and takes a swig of the whiskey.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
So how was your day?
                                                            
                       WES
I got laid.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
You always remember your first.
                                                            
                       WES
      (Sarcastically)
Ha-ha.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
How was it?
                                                            
                       WES
      (Reminiscing)
Good for about fifteen minutes.
Then it dawned on me that the
horrible smell coming from my bed
was her. She smelled like eight
dollar steak. Have you had eight
dollar steak recently? It's like a
cheeseburger, minus the cheese and
bun, covered in steak sauce, with
a side of potato.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Alright, sure. So how'd you get
her to leave.
                                                            
                       WES
I just threw down the charm.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
And that always works...
                                                            
                       WES
      (Sarcastically
       proud)
Like a dollar store brand condom.
                                                            
SCOTTY scans what WES is wearing.
                                                            

8.

                       SCOTTY
I really like the whole Thin White
Duke look, the red distinguishes
you.
                                                            
WES scans himself, examines the textures of his clothes and
looks at SCOTTY with a look of sarcastic disbelief.
                                                            
                       WES
      (Sarcastically)
Thin White Duke... Really? I was
sort of going for a Ziggy Stardust
kind of thing.
                                                            
WES sits on top of his counter.
                                                            
                       WES
So when do we need to be at that
radio station?
                                                            
SCOTTY checks the clock on WES'S oven.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Two hours... But the ride with
traffic is about a half, so do the
math.
                                                            
                       WES
So why'd you show up here so
early?
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
I'm a sucker for face to face
conversation.
                                                            
                       WES
How's the wife?
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
      (Coy)
Carol?
                                                            
                       WES
Yes, Carol. As opposed to your
wife from Trinidad.
                                                            
SCOTTY takes another, longer swig of whiskey.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
I think she's pregnant.
                                                            
                       WES
What do you mean you think she is?
                                                            

9.

                       SCOTTY
She hasn't told me anything yet.
                                                            
WES looks at the television. He's on another segment. The
COMMENTATOR, 43, fake, smiley, arrogant, stands in front of
a cardboard cutout of WES, dressed in a red tuxedo with a
thorn design on the sleeves and breast.
                                                            
                       COMMENTATOR
Wes Walcott... Some call him the
next Houdini. I call him the next
Bjork! This outfit is not hot!
                                                            
The COMMENTATOR sticks a sign with the word "NOT" on the
chest of WES'S cardboard cutout. WES slicks his hair back
and smiles, looking off into space.
                                                            
                       WES
I really liked that tux...
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
      (Smiling)
You were drunk when you picked it
out.
                                                            
                       WES
Getting drunk makes my decisions
easier.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
You sound like a spokesperson for
drunk driving.
                                                            
                       WES
That was my Halloween costume.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
I bet you really decked out for
that.
                                                            
                       WES
I always do. Halloween is my
Christmas.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
      (Unamused)
Wes, you're Jewish.
                                                            
                       WES
Exactly. But back to this whole
Carol thing.
                                                            

10.

                       SCOTTY
      (Coy)
Right.
                                                            
                       WES
So do you think she's hiding her
pregnancy from you or something?
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Yes, that's it exactly. I think
she's under the impression that I
don't want a kid.
                                                            
                       WES
Well you don't.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
      (Excuse)
Well... Not right now. I just
turned thirty nine, and with work
it seems like there are not enough
hours in the day.
                                                            
WES slides off the counter.
                                                            
                       WES
You work for me, Scotty. How busy
can you be?
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Have you looked at your schedule?
It's tough being your manager, as
well as your agent, and your
publicist...
                                                            
                       WES
You're like the Inspector Gadget
of celebrity staff.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
      (Sarcastically)
That's such an illustrious title.
                                                            
                       WES
But in all seriousness, it's that
hectic? My phone hasn't been
ringing...
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Because I've been taking all of
your calls!
                                                            

11.

                       WES
      (Intrigued)
Any personal calls?
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
There are some personal calls, but
they're all past booty calls
wondering why you haven't called
them back.
                                                            
                       WES
      (Flustered)
What did you tell them?
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
What could I tell them? You died?
You joined the Peace Corps? It's
hard to make stuff up about you
when your life is documented on a
twenty-four hour news cycle.
                                                            
                       WES
Now you see my plight.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
And don't even get me started with
industry people!
                                                            
                       WES
      (Laughing)
I won't.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
They're constantly hounding on me
for access to "Wes Walcott: World
Famous Magician"!
                                                            
                       WES
The public can use that term, but
not us. Not among friends.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
What term? Magician?
                                                            
                       WES
That one.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
But that's your job title.
                                                            
                       WES
Yeah, technically. That's what it
says on my taxes. But you know
what that term, that job title
            (MORE)

12.

                       WES (cont'd)
represents to me? It represents
doing card tricks at some bratty
kid's tenth birthday party and
getting paid in cake and backdoor
handjobs by their overweight
soccer mom while some catchy Train
song plays in the background.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
      (Surprised)
That's really specific.
                                                            
                       WES
Well specificity is one of my
strong suits.
                                                            
Wes takes a long swig of whiskey.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
So what would you prefer to be
called? Illusionist? Sleight of
hand master?
                                                            
Wes and Scotty look at each other silently with extreme
seriousness. Wes starts cracking up.
                                                            
                       WES
      (Laughing)
Scotty, I'm just kidding. Magician
is fine. Illusionist just sounds
too serious. Sleight of hand
master? That's just pussy
repellent. I might as well call
myself a Pokemon Master, or the
Last Airbender.
                                                            
Scotty smiles and shakes his head.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Why didn't you become a comedian,
or an actor?
                                                            
                       WES
Because they don't have the magic
groupies.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Good point.
                                                            
Wes walks out of the kitchen towards the front door. Scotty
follows.
                                                            

13.

                       SCOTTY
Wes, we have a little bit of time
before we actually have to go.
                                                            
                       WES
I know, I like to be early. It
shows I'm serious about this.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
But you're not.
                                                            
                       WES
They don't know that.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
      (Grinning)
Ah, you tricky bastard.
                                                            
Wes opens the door and walks out with Scotty. He closes it
behind him and locks it.
                                                            
 
EXT. OUTSIDE WES'S HOUSE - NIGHT
                                                            
Wes looks up at the sky, the sun has just gone down. He
looks down his driveway, which partially overlooks downtown
L.A., he looks back at Scotty.
                                                            
                       WES
You're driving.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Of course I am. I have the ke--
                                                            
Scotty checks his coat pockets for his car keys. He pats
each pocket down twice and looks at Wes angrily. Wes throws
the keys back to him.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
I didn't know you still did that.
                                                            
                       WES
Just because someone takes a break
from walking doesn't mean they've
forgotten to tie their shoes.
                                                            
Wes gets into the passenger's seat of Scotty's car. His car
is very neat, with a small CD holder velcroed to the
dashboard the only thing visible besides the essentials.
Scotty gets into the driver's seat and checks his phone.
They buckle up and drive off.
                                                            
 

14.

INT. SCOTTY'S CAR - NIGHT
                                                            
Wes types something into his phone as Scotty drives.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Texting?
                                                            
Scotty looks slightly interested.
                                                            
                       WES
Close... Sexting.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Anyone I know?
                                                            
                       WES
Unless you're pretty familiar with
Koreatown, then no.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
      (Confused)
Since when have you known girls
from Koreatown?
                                                            
                       WES
Since I went there yesterday.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
You must have had a lot of time on
your hands.
                                                            
                       WES
Well, masturbating gets old, even
with Vaseline. Facebook is just as
bad. Really, that "Like" feature
is what gets me. I don't care if
you like George Lopez, or walking
your dog, or eating your boogers
in second grade. I only have you
as my friend so I can look cooler.
What I really wanted to get into
was scuba diving. But that's just
time consuming.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
You don't have any patience.
                                                            
                       WES
I look at that as one of my few
character flaws.
                                                            

15.

Scotty's car stops at a stoplight. Wes turns on the radio to
hear 103.5 Z-XH. BOBBY, the DJ, comes on among the sound of
a heavy metal guitar solo.
                                                            
                       BOBBY
      (Radio)
Ladies and gentlemen! You're in
for a treat tonight! In
approximately forty five minutes
we'll be continuing our primetime
chat session series with magic's
once and future heartthrob Wes
Walcott!
                                                            
                       WES
That's our guy?
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
      (Sighing)
That's our guy...
                                                            
The stop light turns green and Scotty drives forward.
                                                            
                       WES
Who talks like that? "Once and
future hearthrob"?
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
It explains why he's not on
television...
                                                            
                       WES
      (Sarcastically)
Because you know their standards
are so high.
                                                            
                       BOBBY
      (Radio)
We're gonna want your questions!
Dial three-one-zero--
                                                            
Wes shuts the radio off in a slight anger.
                                                            
                       WES
"Why'd you quit magic, Wes?" "Who
are you dating, Wes?" "Are those
gay rumors true?" If I wanted
people to ask me questions, I
would have a Twitter account.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Wait, you don't have one?
                                                            

16.

                       WES
Nope, I haven't had one since the
one you set up for me.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
And what did you do with that one?
                                                            
                       WES
Deleted it.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
What the hell, Wes? Don't you get
it? Social networking is a big
part of the business nowadays.
                                                            
                       WES
I think you missed a step. I'm
taking a break from performing.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
You still want to stay relevant,
right? I don't want you to get so
obscure that the only way you can
get back in the public eye is by
getting a sex change or having
some cheesy dating show. You have
to be smart about these things if
you're "taking a break".
                                                            
                       WES
Is that what this interview's
about? Is it about me taking a
break?
                                                            
Scotty's car comes on another stop light. Scotty turns
towards Wes.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
I'm going to assume it's going to
come up at some point in the
conversation.
                                                            
                       WES
I'm just not sure if it's going to
be a break. It might be
retirement, I haven't decided.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Let's not discuss it here, or at
the station.
                                                            

17.

The light turns green. Scotty drives forward and Wes turns
the radio back on. A spring-like sound comes from the radio,
followed by the sound of Bobby's voice.
                                                            
                       BOBBY
      (Radio)
So the doctor says, "That's like
putting a new flagpole on a
condemned building!"
                                                            
A sound of fake laughter pours out the radio. Wes changes it
to a smooth jazz station.
                                                            
                       WES
Jesus... How long are we obligated
to keep the interview going?
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
His assistant said ten minutes.
                                                            
                       WES
      (Whining)
Someone might as well give my dick
an indian burn!
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Stop being such a bitch about it.
                                                            
                       WES
Says you, the man who gets to
stand being the soundproof glass
while I'm exposed to all sorts of
FM radio shenanigans.
                                                            
Wes brushes his hand through his hair and sighs heavily,
almost obnoxiously.
                                                            
                       WES
So what does this Bobby guy look
like?
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
I've been told he looks like a
Korean John Cusack.
                                                            
                       WES
      (Disbelieving)
That's impossible.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
It's not plausible. That doesn't
mean it's not possible. You'll see
when we get there.
                                                            

18.

Wes changes the radio station to a hip hop station. He leans
up against the window and zones out. Show a skyline shot of
L.A. as the hip hop music plays. Cut back to Scotty parking
his car in front of the radio station. He nudges Wes.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
We're here.
                                                            
                       WES
      (Emotionless)
Hooray...
                                                            
Wes gets out of Scotty's car.
                                                            
 
EXT. OUTSIDE Z-HX - NIGHT
                                                            
Wes pulls out a Gothic detailed silver flask from his
pocket. Scotty locks his car, walks up and takes the flask
from his hand.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Really?
                                                            
                       WES
Really, really.
                                                            
Wes pulls another, nearly identical flask out from his
pocket. He takes a swig and puts it back as Scotty stares in
disgust and disbelief.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
You're unbelievable.
                                                            
                       WES
Well, that's part of the appeal.
                                                            
BOBBY'S ASSISTANT, 20, small, mousy, unconfident, walks out
the front door and stands there, starstruck by Wes. He walks
towards her.
                                                            
                       WES
      (Annoyed)
Can I help you?
                                                            
                       BOBBY'S ASSISTANT
Um, yes. Bobby's ready for you.
                                                            
Wes follows Bobby's Assistant. He turns back to Scotty and
sarcastically tugs at his collar in fake nervousness. Scotty
rolls his eyes.
                                                            
 

19.

INT. Z-HX - NIGHT
                                                            
Wes, followed by Scotty, follows Bobby's Assistant through
the main lobby, which is very front desk, a couch, a few
doors, and several hanging pictures. He casually looks at
the framed autographs of celebrities and public figures, not
really impressed. The next room is a control booth, filled
with technical gear. Scotty takes a seat in there. Wes
doesn't even glance at the contents of the room and casually
walks into the booth with Bobby, 35, fat, spiked hair, hip
hop inspired clothing.
                                                            
                       BOBBY
      (Smiling)
Bobby Kwon, nice to meet you.
                                                            
Wes and Bobby shake hands.
                                                            
                       WES
Wes Walcott.
                                                            
                       BOBBY
I know.
                                                            
                       WES
It's good to see you've done your
homework.
                                                            
Wes and Bobby stop shaking hands.
                                                            
                       BOBBY
So are you ready?
                                                            
                       WES
Do I really have to be?
                                                            
Bobby awkwardly laughs off Wes's comment and sits down,
followed by Wes. They both put on headphones. Bobby flashes
a hand signal back to the control booth and they're on the
air.
                                                            
                       BOBBY
And... We're back on 103.5 Z-HX!
I'm here with the one, the only
Wes Walcott.
                                                            
Bobby presses a button by his side, it sets off a fake round
of applause. Wes looks unamused.
                                                            
                       WES
Hello.
                                                            

20.

                       BOBBY
How're you tonight?
                                                            
                       WES
Good, and yourself?
                                                            
                       BOBBY
Fantastic. So first question...
                                                            
                       WES
You start off quick.
                                                            
                       BOBBY
That's what all my exes say!
                                                            
Bobby presses another button by his side, this one plays a
generic laugh track.
                                                            
                       WES
So... First question?
                                                            
                       BOBBY
Right, first question. Lacey from
Ocean Beach asks, "Are you done
with performing, or just taking a
break?" That's what I was going to
ask, actually.
                                                            
Wes sits back, comfortably, like he's at home.
                                                            
                       WES
Yeah, I'm taking a break. If I
like it I guess I may just retire.
But for now it's just a break.
                                                            
Scotty face-palms himself and sinks into his chair.
                                                            
                       BOBBY
What do you mean by that? Are you
retiring all together? Don't tell
me you're going to pull a Joaquin
Phoenix!
                                                            
                       WES
That was a hoax... No, I'm not
switching careers. I'm just taking
a break from magic, from TV
appearances, from the whole thing.
                                                            
                       BOBBY
But what about your fans, Wes? The
ones that brought you from the
bowels of the Internet to the big
time? They live to see you
            (MORE)

21.

                       BOBBY (cont'd)
perform!
                                                            
Wes awkwardly laughs for a second.
                                                            
                       WES
Well, that's always encouraging to
hear. The thing is, my schedule
really takes a huge toll on me.
                                                            
                       BOBBY
But all celebrities have a busy
schedule, Wes. It sounds to me
like you're really sort of biting
the hand that feeds.
                                                            
                       WES
I don't mean to alienate my fans.
They've made me a lot of money...
                                                            
Scotty buries his head in his lap.
                                                            
                       BOBBY
So you're saying that your fans...
The ones who put you on top...
They're just paychecks to you?
                                                            
                       WES
Don't put words in my mouth.
                                                            
                       BOBBY
I don't need to.
                                                            
                       BOBBY
Here's the deal, Bobby. I'm tired,
I'm overworked. And I need a
break. I've been doing magic shows
since I was seventeen, and It's
starting to wear on me. Right now
I'm taking a break, I may retire.
Who knows?
                                                            
                       WES
Well Lacey from Ocean Beach,
there's your answer, kind of.
We'll be right back with Wes
Walcott after a few mandatory
commercials.
                                                            
Bobby takes off his headphones and flashes another hand
signal to the control booth. They go to commercial. Wes
takes off their headphones.
                                                            

22.

                       BOBBY
Wow, you might have just made my
career.
                                                            
                       WES
      (Angrily)
Fuck you!
                                                            
                       BOBBY
It's not everyday you have a major
celebrity just short of announce
their retirement on your show,
give a reason for it, then
continue to be cryptic about it.
This is going to be all over the
web, the news, you name it. For a
guy who wants to stay out of the
spotlight and settle down you
really don't do yourself any
favors.
                                                            
Scotty comes out from the control booth.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
      (Distraught)
This interview's over, Bobby.
                                                            
                       BOBBY
What the fuck do you mean it's
over?!
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
You're just going to pick away at
him no matter what he says until
you get better ratings.
                                                            
                       BOBBY
You can't do this!
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Hell yes I can, there was never
any contractual obligation, just
an informal one.
                                                            
Wes and Scotty walk out of the booth, through the control
room, and out the door.
                                                            
 
EXT. OUTSIDE Z-HX - NIGHT
                                                            
Scotty looks back at Wes.
                                                            

23.

                       SCOTTY
Do you mind telling me what the
fuck that was all about? He
cracked you like a walnut!
                                                            
                       WES
I have no idea what happened in
there.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Suffice to say, it was terrible.
                                                            
                       WES
Would this be a bad time to say I
told you so?
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Yes, an extremely bad time.
                                                            
Wes and Scotty settle down. Scotty unlocks his car.
                                                            
                       WES
Wait. My house is going to be
crawling with photographers and
those god awful tabloid people.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Do you want to stay at my place?
                                                            
                       WES
Will the wife care?
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
I don't think it's going to
matter. It's not like I can do
much worse in her eyes. I already
knocked her up.
                                                            
                       WES
Allegedly...
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
That's what I'm hoping at this
point.
                                                            
                       WES
If you keep this mentality up
you'll love this kid enough to
have cameras follow them around
until they're ten.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
What happens at ten?
                                                            

24.

                       WES
Well that's when they start
getting ugly, or people stop
caring.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
If you're getting out of the
business then it probably wouldn't
be a terrible idea. Who knows,
maybe I could have a spin-off
after they turn ten?
                                                            
                       WES
You know no matter what I'd take
care of you.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
I appreciate the gesture but I
never asked you to be my mountain.
                                                            
                       WES
I have no idea what that means.
                                                            
Wes and Scotty get back in Scotty's car.
                                                            
 
INT. SCOTTY'S CAR - NIGHT
                                                            
Wes takes his vest off and sets it in the back.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
You're aware that Bobby just got
rich off that gem of
miscommunication you laid out
during that interview, right?
                                                            
                       WES
      (Embarrassed)
I'm painfully aware, thank you.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
There was a point there where I
thought I was watching the Montel
Williams show.
                                                            
                       WES
I got it. Blame the therapeutic
part in me.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Already done.
                                                            

25.

                       WES
      (Sarcastically)
That's nice.
                                                            
Scotty pulls his car into a lot in front of his condo.
                                                            
                       WES
I forgot how close you lived to
the station...
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Well it's the best place I can get
with the money you pay me.
                                                            
                       WES
I'll make a note of that.
                                                            
Scotty parks his car, turns it off and gets out, Wes
follows.
                                                            
 
EXT. OUTSIDE SCOTTY'S CONDO - NIGHT
                                                            
The two walk towards the front door of Scotty's condo.
                                                            
                       WES
You sure Carol won't mind?
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Of course not, you're like family.
                                                            
                       WES
Is that why I'm on your Christmas
card?
                                                            
Scotty pats down his pockets again and turns around. He
turns back and looks at Wes.
                                                            
                       WES
Did you...?
                                                            
                       WES
No idea what you're refering to.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
I left my phone in the car. Just
walk in, Carol's probably asleep
by now.
                                                            
Scotty turns around and walks back to his car. Wes opens the
door to Scotty's condo.
                                                            
 

26.

INT. SCOTTY'S CONDO - NIGHT
                                                            
Wes walks in. The condo is very boringly decorated, just
pictures and bland furniture. He stops and hears rustling
coming from the living room. He slowly walks towards the
rustling to find CAROL, 33, short, Hispanic, having sex with
a TATTOOED MAN, 31, bald, tattooed head to toe, fat. He
glances at them in shock, then silently turns around and
walks towards the door. Scotty walks in, unassuming.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
What's up?
                                                            
                       WES
Carol's not home. We should go out
for drinks or something.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
What do you mean? I saw her car in
the parking lot.
                                                            
Scotty looks at Wes, extremely concerned. Wes brushes his
hair back and awkwardly smiles.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
So where do you think she is?
                                                            
                       WES
      (Flustered)
Uh... Not here?
                                                            
Scotty rushes towards his living room frantically. Wes waits
in the hall, back turned to the living room, rubbing his
face.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
      (OS)
Carol?! Carol?! Carol! Carol, what
the fuck is this?! Who is this
guy?!
                                                            
Wes runs towards Scotty. Scotty is shoving the Tattooed Man,
now covered in a towel. Wes breaks them up.
                                                            
                       WES
Scotty! Scotty! Chill!
                                                            
The Tattooed Man and Wes walk back to the kitchen area and
watch as Scotty argues with Carol, covered in a blanket.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Carol, what is this?! Who is this
guy?!
                                                            

27.

                       CAROL
I'm sorry, Scotty! I was going to
talk to you about it!
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
About what, Carol?! That you're
fucking the Tattooed Man?!
                                                            
                       TATTOOED MAN
Hey!
                                                            
Wes turns towards the Tattooed Man.
                                                            
                       WES
Dude, if I were you I wouldn't say
a word... Wait, why are you still
here?! Get out!
                                                            
The Tattooed Man grabs his clothes and hurries out the front
door.
                                                            
                       CAROL
      (Lightly Crying)
Scotty, I've started divorce
proceedings.
                                                            
Wes and Scotty simultaneously look flabbergasted at Carol.
Wes walks out of the kitchen towards Carol and Scotty.
                                                            
                       WES
Were you just going to surprise
him with a cake and a card or
something?!
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Wes! Stay out of it!
                                                            
                       WES
Sorry...
                                                            
Wes walks outside of Scotty's condo as Scotty and Carol
continue to argue.
                                                            
 
EXT. OUTSIDE SCOTTY'S CONDO - NIGHT
                                                            
Wes waits outside the door, listening to the shouts coming
from inside. Scotty swings the door open and slams it shut
as he walks out. He looks stern and depressed. Wes follows,
keeping quiet.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
She's pregnant.
                                                            

28.

                       WES
Congratulations?
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
It's not mine.
                                                            
                       WES
I take that back.
                                                            
Wes and Scotty enter Scotty's car.
                                                            
 
INT. SCOTTY'S CAR - NIGHT
                                                            
Scotty drives off and almost immediately is stopped by a
stop light. He lays his head on the steering wheel, he turns
his head towards Wes.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
      (Emotionless)
Do you think I have a nice car?
                                                            
                       WES
      (Confused)
What? Yeah, you do. Why are you
asking?
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Because I'm probably going to be
living in it for the next few
days.
                                                            
                       WES
Bullshit! I'm not going to let you
live in your car! Your wife just
left you!
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
      (Depressingly
       Sarcastic)
Oh, I forgot...
                                                            
                       WES
Sorry... But seriously, I would
never do that to you.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Duly noted.
                                                            
Scotty looks up from the steering wheel to see a green
light. He pulls forward. Cut to Scotty's car pulling up in
front of Wes's house.
                                                            
 

29.

EXT. OUTSIDE WES'S HOUSE - NIGHT
                                                            
Scotty pulls up to see paparazzi surrounding Wes's house.
Wes squirms in his seat.
                                                            
                       WES
They're like fucking ninjas.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
I thought you liked the attention?
                                                            
                       WES
Yeah, like three years ago, when
it got me laid all the time. Now
it just causes me to wear
sunglasses at night and have a
grudge against flashes.
                                                            
Wes gets out of Scotty's car. The paparazzi swarm him with
questions and camera flashes, he ignores all of them. He
walks up to his door, unlocks it, and walks in.
                                                            
 
INT. WES'S LIVING ROOM - NIGHT
                                                            
Wes walks into his living room, decorated almost identical
to his bedroom. He flops down on his couch and turns on the
television, fliping through the channels, some of them have
him on there, some don't. Wes yawns and turns it off. Scotty
walks in from a side door.
                                                            
                       WES
How're you feeling?
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
      (Somberly)
Like I can walk on water, thanks
for asking.
                                                            
Wes grimaces and opens his laptop on the coffee table. He
opens his email, his jaw drops.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
What is it?
                                                            
                       WES
258 new messages.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
It's like your Facebook account.
                                                            

30.

                       WES
On a slow day... This email's
from... James Guster in Amarillo,
Texas.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Read it.
                                                            
                       WES
He writes, or types, "Dear Mr.
Walcott. First off, fuck you. You
let me down. I was your biggest
fan." I've heard that one before.
"I wanted to be a magician just
like you. But now I don't know who
or what I want to be. Whatever it
is, it certainly won't be anything
like you." Oh man, that was harsh.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
That was intense.
                                                            
                       WES
It was like emo poetry.
                                                            
There is a banging at the front door. Wes stands up and
walks up to it. He opens it sticks his head out. The
paparazzi swarm him again.
                                                            
                       WES
Get off of my property or I'll
call the police. Last warning.
                                                            
Wes sticks his head back in and slams the door. He turns to
see Scotty lightly crying.
                                                            
                       WES
      (Concerned)
Scotty...
                                                            
Scotty wipes his tears away.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
I'm sorry, man. I was just so in
shock that I didn't really have
time to process it. This whole
thing, you know...
                                                            
                       WES
Now you know how I felt after the
last Spy Kids movie came out.
                                                            

31.

Scotty and Wes share a collective laugh. Wes sits down on
his couch and types something in on his laptop.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
So what are we going to do now? I
mean, considering I'm getting
divorced and you've just about
quit your "job"?
                                                            
                       WES
I'm currently working on that...
Okay, I got it. Two tickets to
Amarillo, Texas. The flight is
tomorrow morning at ten.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
That was fast.
                                                            
                       WES
I have good wi-fi.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
      (Suspicious)
Hold on... Why are we going to
Amarillo? Is it because of that
James Guster kid?
                                                            
                       WES
Of course. I don't want some kid
in the middle of the lone star
state to feel... Well, lone.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Aren't you noble.
                                                            
                       WES
Well, I know what it's like, to be
alone I mean.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Texas and Ohio aren't the same
place, Wes.
                                                            
                       WES
But places are all the same when
you feel alone. It doesn't matter.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
      (Annoyed)
Is this going to be a common
thing? Take a special trip to
visit everyone that sends you an
angry, heartfelt email?
                                                            

32.

                       WES
No, it's just something that I
want... That I need to do.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
And you're just assuming that I
want to come along?
                                                            
                       WES
Well I know you don't want to stay
here.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Yeah... That's probably for the
best.
                                                            
                       WES
      (Smugly)
Hence why I said it.
                                                            
Wes stands up, pats Scotty on the back and walks to the
kitchen. Scotty follows.
                                                            
 
INT. WES'S KITCHEN - NIGHT
                                                            
Wes grabs the still open whiskey off his counter and takes a
swig, then holds the bottle up to Scotty.
                                                            
                       WES
To Amarillo!
                                                            
Scotty looks at Wes, clearly still sad. Then takes a swig
himself and holds it up.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
To Amarillo, and wherever else the
road may take us.
                                                            
                       WES
Really?
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
What?
                                                            
                       WES
"To Amarillo, and wherever else
the road may take us"?
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
I thought that sounded heartfelt.
                                                            

33.

                       WES
      (Laughing)
By heartfelt do you mean super
gay?
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Now you have to bring the
sexuality card into it?
                                                            
                       WES
I have no idea what you're talking
about.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
      (Smiling)
Just go to bed.
                                                            
                       WES
That was exactly what I was going
to say to you.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Okay then.
                                                            
                       WES
Have a good night, man.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
You too.
                                                            
Scotty walks upstairs.
                                                            
                       WES
Don't let me hear you crying
tonight!
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
      (OS)
I'll try not to!
                                                            
Wes puts away the whiskey and walks up to his bathroom.
                                                            
 
INT. WES'S BATHROOM - NIGHT
                                                            
Wes opens up his foggy bathroom mirror. Behind it there are
rows of pill bottles. Wes carefully examines them and picks
out one. The pills were clearly not prescribed to him, as
someone else's name is on the bottle. He puts two pills in
his mouth and swallows them down with mouthwash. He grimaces
and sets the mouthwash down.
                                                            

34.

                       WES
Hot damn.
                                                            
Wes splashes water on his face and smiles at his reflection
in the mirror. He walks out into his room.
                                                            
 
INT. WES'S BEDROOM - NIGHT
                                                            
Wes strips to his underwear and flops on his bed, only
covering the back of his head with a small throw pillow. Cut
to a plane flying through the air, then landing.
                                                            
 
EXT. OUTSIDE AMARILLO INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT - DAY
                                                            
Wes and Scotty wait with their luggage outside of the
airport. The sidewalk is dirty, covered with bags and
people. Scotty looks tired.
                                                            
                       WES
How you holding up?
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
What do you mean?
                                                            
                       WES
You talk in your sleep.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
      (Surprised)
Seriously?
                                                            
                       WES
That's not something I'd make up.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
What was I talking about?
                                                            
                       WES
Something about St. Barts?
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
That's where Carol and I had our
honeymoon.
                                                            
A taxi pulls up. Wes and Scotty load their things and get
in.
                                                            
 

35.

INT. TAXI - DAY
                                                            
Wes leans towards the window. The TAXI DRIVER, 52, Hispanic,
tired looking, looks at him, awaiting directions.
                                                            
                       TAXI DRIVER
Where to?
                                                            
                       WES
The cheapest motel in the downtown
area. I would prefer one that I
wouldn't have to worry about being
raped or murdered in.
                                                            
                       TAXI DRIVER
      (Unamused)
Whatever, buddy.
                                                            
The taxi drives off. Wes turns to Scotty.
                                                            
                       WES
See man, you can't read to far
into this Carol thing.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Are you aware that this whole
thing happened less than twenty
four hours ago?
                                                            
                       WES
Oh, don't worry, it's crystal
clear. All I'm saying is enjoy
yourself. You're single, you're in
a new place. You're with me...
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Don't get carried away. I want to
ease into things.
                                                            
                       WES
Personally, I can't see any easier
way for you to ease into things
besides getting your D wet.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
You just skip right to the point,
don't you?
                                                            
                       WES
Go big or go home, man.
                                                            

36.

                       SCOTTY
Isn't that what you said after
getting gonorrhea?
                                                            
                       WES
      (Embarrassed)
No comment.
                                                            
Scotty plugs headphones into his phone and stares out the
window. Wes looks over at him and does the same. Cut to the
two being dropped off at a motel. Wes pays the Taxi Driver
and Scotty gets their things. They walk into the motel.
                                                            
 
INT. MOTEL LOBBY - DAY
                                                            
The motel is decorated in 70's era furniture, all of it
plastic covered. The CLERK (19, gaunt, mohawk) looks at Wes
and Scotty as they enter. Scotty sets their bags down. The
Clerk stops writing and squints and smiles at Wes.
                                                            
                       CLERK
Do I know you from somewhere?
                                                            
                       WES
Well I don't know you.
                                                            
                       CLERK
      (Starstruck)
Oh shit! You're Wes Walcott! What
the hell are you doing in
Amarillo?
                                                            
                       WES
Alright, first of all...
                                                            
Wes signs the motel's sign in book as "Ted Doorhumper".
                                                            
                       WES
Second, nice to meet you. But my
business is my business.
                                                            
                       CLERK
      (Embarrassed)
I'm sorry, I... I'm just a big
fan.
                                                            
Wes grabs a piece of scratch paper from the side of the
front desk, signs his name and hands it to the Clerk.
                                                            
                       WES
I always appreciate a fan. If
anyone asks about this autograph,
say you got it two months ago when
            (MORE)

37.

                       WES (cont'd)
I was performing in Austin.
                                                            
                       CLERK
      (Flustered)
Got it.
                                                            
                       WES
Damn right you do. Now where can
my friend and I find a room.
                                                            
The Clerk eagerly hands Wes a door key.
                                                            
                       CLERK
Up the stairs, second on your
right.
                                                            
Wes reaches into his back pocket for his wallet.
                                                            
                       WES
How much do I owe you?
                                                            
                       CLERK
The first night's on me.
                                                            
Wes smiles back at Scotty and looks back at the Clerk.
                                                            
                       WES
Well, thanks man.
                                                            
                       CLERK
No problem Mr. Walcott.
                                                            
                       WES
      (Flattered)
I'm not the president, call me
Wes.
                                                            
                       CLERK
Uh, Wes... I'm gonna be here all
night. So if you need directions,
or a rental car, or something,
just call.
                                                            
                       WES
I'll keep that in mind, thanks.
                                                            
Scotty tosses Wes his bag. They walk up the stairs and enter
their room.
                                                            
 

38.

INT. MOTEL ROOM - DAY
                                                            
The room is very much in the same vein as the lobby, 70's
looking, neat, newly dusted. Scotty examines the two beds
and sets his things down next to the right bed. Wes sets his
bag in the bathroom and flops down on the left bed. He leans
over towards Scotty.
                                                            
                       WES
      (Playfully)
So you want to move the beds
together?
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
I put some heavy consideration
into it. But I'm going to have to
go with no.
                                                            
                       WES
Suit yourself.
                                                            
Wes hops off his bed.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
What's with you today?
                                                            
                       WES
      (Eagerly)
I want to go and walk around the
town!
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
From the looks of things there's
not much to do.
                                                            
                       WES
There wasn't much to do in
Omaha...
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Oh Jesus, don't talk about Omaha.
                                                            
                       WES
In case you're wondering... I
wasn't the father.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
      (Snidely)
I think I figured that out.
                                                            
Wes grabs a couple things from his bag and puts it in his
jacket pocket. He looks back at Scotty.
                                                            

39.

                       WES
You sure?
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Is the Pope catholic?
                                                            
                       WES
I don't know his life.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
      (Exhausted)
Yes. Yes, I'm sure.
                                                            
                       WES
I'll have my phone on me.
                                                            
Wes leaves. Scotty sits up and slides back towards his
headboard. He curls up in a ball and opens up a picture on
his phone. It's of a slightly younger Carol holding a puppy
and smiling. Scotty buries his head and lightly starts to
cry. Cut to Wes, standing on a nearby street corner,
smoking.
                                                            
 
EXT. AMARILLO - DAY
                                                            
The streets are dusty, sparsely populated. A BUSINESS
MASCOT, 21, skater type, dressed like a hotdog, walks up to
Wes.
                                                            
                       BUSINESS MASCOT
Hey man, have you heard the news?!
                                                            
                       WES
Please tell me you're not a hotdog
trying to tell me about the "Word
of the Lord" or some shit.
                                                            
                       BUSINESS MASCOT
No man! O'Grady's Hotdogs is
having a two for one sale! Open
twenty-four seven!
                                                            
                       WES
That's a relief... Wait,
twenty-four seven?
                                                            
                       BUSINESS MASCOT
Yeah, man. Times are tough.
                                                            
                       WES
      (Smugly smiling)
Tell me about it.
                                                            

40.

Wes puts out his cigarette. The Business Mascot hands him a
flier and dances off, muttering a verse from a pop song. Wes
walks down the street and quietly observe the people around
him. He notices a nearby young boy trip and let go of a
balloon. Wes jumps and grabs it and hands it to the boy. The
boy's father stops to thank Wes. He recognizes him, Wes
smiles, shakes his hand and walks off. His phone vibrates in
his pocket. He answers it.
                                                            
                       WES
Hello? (Pause) Hey, Mom... How are
you? (Pause) Yep, I did. (Pause)
What? (Pause) That's great!
(Pause) Yeah, sorry... (Pause) I'm
currently in Amarillo. (Pause)
It's in Texas. (Pause) Yeah, I'll
be home soon. (Pause) I love you
too, Mom. (Pause) I'll talk to you
soon.
                                                            
Wes hangs up his phone. He puts it back in his pocket and
walks down the street. Cut to a skyline of Amarillo as the
sun goes down. Cut to Wes knocking on his motel door.
                                                            
 
INT. MOTEL LOBBY - NIGHT
                                                            
                       WES
Scotty?! I thought we had a rule
about locking doors?!
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
      (OS)
I'll be right there!
                                                            
Scotty opens the door and lets Wes in.
                                                            
 
INT. MOTEL ROOM - NIGHT
                                                            
Scotty sits back on his bed, the sheets are ruffled.
                                                            
                       WES
Thanks, man. So you ready to go
out?
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
You just came back.
                                                            
                       WES
I'm aware of that fact.
                                                            

41.

                       SCOTTY
Don't you want to settle down?
                                                            
                       WES
That's what my mom asks. But no. I
want to go out again. This time to
a bar, or a club. Your choice.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Really?
                                                            
                       WES
      (Sincerely)
Yeah, really. Bar or club?
                                                            
Scotty smiles widely.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Bar.
                                                            
                       WES
      (Disappointed)
Not my first choice...
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Trust me, It'll be fun.
                                                            
Scotty grabs a suit coat from his bag and follows Wes out
the door. Cut to Wes and Scotty walking into the bar.
                                                            
 
INT. BAR - NIGHT
                                                            
The bar is very southern flavored, but otherwise typical.
Wes and Scotty sit down and order drinks.
                                                            
                       WES
So, have you talked to Carol yet?
                                                            
Wes and Scotty are slid their drinks.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Nope.
                                                            
Scotty chugs his whole drink, grimaces, sets it down and
orders another.
                                                            
                       WES
Slow down there, Wally West.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
      (Unamused)
I don't get the reference.
                                                            

42.

Scotty is slid another drink. Wes finishes his and orders
another.
                                                            
                       WES
      (Surprised)
Wally West? The Flash, man! You
never read comics as a kid?
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
No, did you?
                                                            
                       WES
You've never seen the collection
in my house?
                                                            
Wes is slid another drink.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
I try to avoid looking around your
house. I'm afraid what I might
find...
                                                            
Two men come up behind Wes. One (JUDD, 40, fat, balding)
slides up next to him. The other (ELI, 32, small, skinny,
missing teeth) sits back. Wes continues looking forward,
avoiding eye contact. Scotty looks tense.
                                                            
                       JUDD
That was my seat.
                                                            
                       WES
Really?
                                                            
                       JUDD
      (Angrily)
That's the one I just picked out.
It's right between the TV and that
bartender with the big titties.
                                                            
The BARTENDER looks offended.
                                                            
                       WES
You are just a big, illiterate,
walking stereotype, aren't you?
                                                            
                       JUDD
What the hell's that supposed to
mean?
                                                            
Judd backs up towards Eli. Wes turns towards them as Scotty
burrows his head and onlookers stare and whisper.
                                                            

43.

                       WES
I'm guessing you don't think Obama
was born in this country, do you?
                                                            
                       JUDD
Well he wasn't!
                                                            
                       WES
Right... And you own a truck?
                                                            
                       ELI
      (Proud)
Biggest and baddest in the county!
                                                            
Judd turns back to Eli, angrily.
                                                            
                       JUDD
Shut up, Eli!
                                                            
                       WES
And you probably think there's
nothing wrong with fucking your
first cousin?
                                                            
                       JUDD
You don't fucking know me!
                                                            
Wes turns around on his bar stool and looks at Judd.
                                                            
                       WES
      (Stern)
I don't need to... You can sit
anywhere else in this bar, hassle
anyone else you want. But my
friend and I, we're not leaving.
                                                            
                       JUDD
Alright then...
                                                            
Wes turns around as Judd walks off. Judd stops, turns around
and lunges at Wes. Wes slides off his chair, causing Judd to
land on the bar. Wes smashes a beer bottle on the bar and
holds the sharp edge to his throat.
                                                            
                       WES
Many have tried, motherfucker.
Many have tried.
                                                            
Eli lunges at Wes, but Scotty punches him out. He shakes his
fist in pain. Wes looks up, impressed.
                                                            

44.

                       WES
And I was thinking you were the
world's biggest pussy...
                                                            
The onlookers cheer and Wes slaps a hundred dollar bill on
the bar. He and Scotty walk out of the bar as two men go to
check on Judd and Eli.
                                                            
 
EXT. AMARILLO - NIGHT
                                                            
Wes and Scotty walk to a nearby bench, littered with
advertisements, and sit down.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
That was awesome.
                                                            
                       WES
I know right?
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
So when are we meeting that Guster
kid?
                                                            
                       WES
I haven't really thought that far
ahead.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Don't you have his address?
                                                            
                       WES
Yeah, you'd be suprised how many
people in Amarillo don't have the
last name Guster.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Why don't we go pay him a visit?
                                                            
                       WES
      (Matter of fact)
Well, for starters, it's nine
o'clock.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Hasn't stopped you before.
                                                            
                       WES
True... What's gotten you so
extreme?
                                                            

45.

                       SCOTTY
      (Excited)
The fight! Have you forgotten
about it already? You were great
in there!
                                                            
                       WES
Thanks, but it just wasn't the
highlight of my night.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Then what was it?
                                                            
                       WES
I think "Texas Flood" was on the
jukebox. That's an awesome song.
                                                            
Scotty shrugs off the comment.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
      (Annoyed)
Are we going to see this kid, or
not?
                                                            
                       WES
Call a cab.
                                                            
Scotty pulls out his phone and starts dialing. Wes walks
off.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Where are you going?
                                                            
                       WES
To take a piss.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
That's illegal.
                                                            
                       WES
Yeah, I know.
                                                            
Wes walks off into an alley as Scotty calls a cab. Wes pulls
a small beaker filled with cocaine from his inside jacket
pocket. He snorts it, shakes his head and rests his head
against a wall.
                                                            
                       WES
      (Quietly singing)
Pour... Some... Sugar on me...
Bada... Doom... Doom...
                                                            

46.

Wes leans his head off the wall, shakes it, and walks back
towards Scotty.
                                                            
                       WES
Call a cab?
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Yep, did you drain the main vein?
                                                            
                       WES
Indeed I did.
                                                            
A taxi pulls up.
                                                            
                       WES
Wow.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Their depot is only located like a
block and a half away.
                                                            
                       WES
That's convenient.
                                                            
Wes and Scotty get in the taxi.
                                                            
 
INT. TAXI - NIGHT
                                                            
Wes leans forward into the seat in front of him as Scotty
gives the Taxi Driver the address.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
      (Slightly
       concerned)
Wes? Are you alright?
                                                            
                       WES
      (Weakly)
Yeah...
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
      (Smugly)
Did you have too much to drink?
                                                            
Wes leans back.
                                                            
                       WES
I'm fine... Just got a little
carsick for a second and a half.
                                                            
Wes leans his head on Scotty's shoulder.
                                                            

47.

                       SCOTTY
      (Sarcastically)
Aw, shucks.
                                                            
                       WES
Keep your pants on.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Will do.
                                                            
Wes closes his eyes. Cut to the Taxi stopping. Scotty nudges
Wes.
                                                            
                       WES
What's up?
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
      (Triumphantly)
You know, I may talk when I sleep.
But you... You sir, you mutter
when you sleep.
                                                            
                       WES
So you can put words together. Big
deal. Are we at that Guster kid's
house?
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Yeah. By the looks of things, he's
not so lonely after all...
                                                            
Wes takes his head off Scotty's shoulder and looks out the
Taxi's window. Jame's House, a one story, medium sized
house, is lit up, with loud music emanating from it.
                                                            
                       WES
Apparently not...
                                                            
Scotty pays the Taxi Driver and he gets out of the taxi. Wes
follows and brushes himself off. The taxi drives off into
the night.
                                                            
 
EXT. OUTSIDE JAMES'S HOUSE - NIGHT
                                                            
Scotty walks towards the front door, Wes follows.
                                                            
                       WES
Let me go first.
                                                            
Wes walks in front of Scotty.
                                                            

48.

                       SCOTTY
Why?
                                                            
Wes rings the doorbell.
                                                            
                       WES
Trust me.
                                                            
JAMES, 17, medium height, acne faced, shaggy hair, answers
the door.
                                                            
                       JAMES
      (Shocked)
Holy...
                                                            
                       WES
Yeah, I know, It's me. Can my
friend and I come in?
                                                            
                       JAMES
Of... Of course.
                                                            
Wes and Scotty follow James into his house.
                                                            
 
INT. JAMES'S HOUSE - NIGHT
                                                            
The house is nicely decorated, average looking. But with all
the kids partying it is messy. All the kids at the party go
silent and spread to create a path for Wes as he and Scotty
follow James.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
      (Impressed)
Like fucking Moses...
                                                            
                       WES
      (Modest)
Yeah...
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Why wasn't it like this at the
bar?
                                                            
                       WES
They weren't my demographic.
                                                            
A DRUNK TEENAGE GIRL thrusts herself at Wes chest first,
Scotty and James stop.
                                                            
                       DRUNK TEENAGE GIRL
Oh my god! Sign my tits!
                                                            

49.

                       WES
      (Amused)
Of all places?
                                                            
                       DRUNK TEENAGE GIRL
Yeah! Do it!
                                                            
                       WES
I've got something to attend to...
But maybe when I come back.
                                                            
James continues walking, followed by Wes and Scotty.
                                                            
                       DRUNK TEENAGE GIRL
Suit yourself! You won't get
another pair like these!
                                                            
Wes looks back at Scotty as smirks.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Teenagers...
                                                            
James leads Wes and Scotty into his room.
                                                            
 
INT. JAMES'S BEDROOM - NIGHT
                                                            
James turns on the lights. His room is filled with posters
and memorabilia, most of which are Wes-related. Wes and
Scotty look at each other, each slightly creeped out.
                                                            
                       WES
      (Slightly shocked)
So... I take it you're a big fan.
                                                            
James looks at the contents of his room, embarrassed.
                                                            
                       JAMES
Yeah... Yeah, I am.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
So what was up with that email?
                                                            
Wes glares at Scotty.
                                                            
                       WES
      (Angrily)
Scotty...
                                                            
James looks flustered and sits on the edge of his bed.
                                                            

50.

                       JAMES
Is that why you're here? Because
of that email? I'm sorry... I
was...
                                                            
                       WES
It's fine, really. I just wanted
to stop by and say... Well, I may
not be performing, for right now
at least. But I'm still around.
Which leads to the fun part...
                                                            
Wes reaches into his inside jacket pocket and pulls out a
check and a ripped piece of paper and hands it to James.
                                                            
                       WES
Take a look.
                                                            
James looks down at the check in shock. It's worth $50,000.
                                                            
                       WES
I may have given up on my dreams.
But you... You don't have to. You
want to be like me, so here you
go. This is enough to get you the
best training money can buy.
                                                            
Scotty looks at Wes in a similar shock.
                                                            
                       JAMES
Th... Th... Thank you!
                                                            
James springs off his bed and hugs Wes.
                                                            
                       WES
My number's on that sheet of
paper. So if there are any bank
issues...
                                                            
James lets go of Wes.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
      (Skeptical)
Whose party is this, yours?
                                                            
                       JAMES
My brother's, actually. He just
goes to the community college.
                                                            

51.

                       SCOTTY
      (Impatient)
Well, we've got a flight to catch
in the morning. It was really nice
meeting you.
                                                            
                       JAMES
You... You too.
                                                            
Wes and Scotty walk out. Wes comes back.
                                                            
                       WES
Hey, forgot to mention... Don't go
blabbing about that check,
alright? Cash it and don't talk
about it.
                                                            
                       JAMES
Okay.
                                                            
Wes waves to James and leaves his room. James sits shocked
on his bed, looking at the check.
                                                            
 
INT. JAMES'S HOUSE - NIGHT
                                                            
Wes catches up with Scotty, who ignores him, as another path
opens up. The Drunk Teenage Girl thrusts herself at Wes
again.
                                                            
                       DRUNK TEENAGE GIRL
      (Frantic)
Please?!
                                                            
Wes lightly shoves her off.
                                                            
                       WES
      (Politely)
Sorry, honey. There are laws
against that sort of thing.
                                                            
Wes and Scotty walk out the front door.
                                                            
 
EXT. OUTSIDE JAMES'S HOUSE - NIGHT
                                                            
Wes looks at Scotty, who has his back turned to him.
                                                            
                       WES
Did you call another cab?
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
I texted them.
                                                            

52.

                       WES
      (Nervously)
The glories of the future, right?
                                                            
Scotty turns towards Wes.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Do you think those kids in there
can hear us?
                                                            
Wes turns towards the house, then turns back to Scotty.
                                                            
                       WES
No, why?
                                                            
Scotty pushes Wes, extremely angry.
                                                            
                       WES
What the fuck, man?!
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Why are you giving out fifty G's
to some kid?! Are you Willy Wonka
all of the sudden?!
                                                            
                       WES
The money... It's not a big deal
to me. I'm going to recoup that in
royalties probably by Monday.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
But that's not the issue! People
are going to hear about this!
                                                            
                       WES
But there's a non-disclosure
agreement...
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Where's the contract?
                                                            
                       WES
What contract?
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
The contract I know you don't
have.
                                                            
The taxi pulls up. Wes and Scotty get in.
                                                            
 

53.

INT. TAXI - NIGHT
                                                            
Scotty checks the time on his phone as Wes gives the Taxi
Driver directions. Wes leans back on his seat.
                                                            
                       WES
So, in conclusion, you don't trust
this James kid?
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Does a bear shit in the woods?
                                                            
                       WES
I don't know the details of a
bear's life.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
No, Wes, I don't trust this James
kid.
                                                            
                       WES
Fine, well let's recap. Exhibit A:
this kid's obsessed with me, he
wouldn't dare cross me. Exhibit B:
nobody seems to give a shit about
him anyway, so no one will notice.
Exhibit C: the money's out of one
of my foreign accounts, so he
really has no proof, that money
could've come from anywhere.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
But what about those kids at the
party? They know exactly who you
are! Jesus, the press probably
knows we're here!
                                                            
                       WES
Well, for starters, I don't give a
flying fuck about the press
tracking me. Good luck. Second,
those kids are probably so
hammered right now they'll wake up
tomorrow thinking I was the ghost
of Bing Crosby or one of those
things from Avatar.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
      (Frustrated)
But...
                                                            
                       WES
It's fine. Don't worry about it.
                                                            

54.

Wes brushes his hair back.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
      (Awkwardly)
So, anything new?
                                                            
                       WES
So my mom called me today...
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Really? How long has it been?
                                                            
                       WES
Five months.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Anything new in the land of Akron?
                                                            
                       WES
My sister had a baby.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
      (Surprised)
Brenda?
                                                            
                       WES
      (Laughing)
Gives a whole new meaning to
"Brenda's Got a Baby", right?
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Yeah, I guess it does.
                                                            
                       WES
And, unless you have a problem
with it, I'm probably give her
some money too.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
      (Confused)
So that's where we're going
tomorrow? To Akron?
                                                            
                       WES
That's the plan. But if you want
to go back to L.A. I understand.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
To L.A.? Are you kidding me?
There's nothing left for me there.
                                                            

55.

                       WES
      (Smirking)
Good, that saves me money on
another plane ticket.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
So you just assumed I was coming
with you?
                                                            
                       WES
Yeah.
                                                            
The Taxi Driver stops at a stoplight and turns towards Wes
and Scotty.
                                                            
                       TAXI DRIVER
This is the third time I've driven
you two today, and you know what?
                                                            
                       WES
We're both extrememly attractive?
                                                            
                       TAXI DRIVER
      (Angrily)
No! You never shut the fuck up!
                                                            
                       WES
Jesus, man! I don't know how your
other customers are, but I'm not
paying you to listen!
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
      (Frightened)
Wes, I'm paying...
                                                            
                       WES
Besides the point... You know
what, driver? Drop us off.
                                                            
                       TAXI DRIVER
It's your dollar.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Uh, actually my dollar...
                                                            
Scotty pays the Taxi Driver. He gets out, followed by Wes.
                                                            
 
EXT. AMARILLO - NIGHT
                                                            
The taxi speeds off into the night. Wes and Scotty sit on
the sidewalk, littered with beer bottles and paper.
                                                            

56.

                       SCOTTY
      (Shocked)
What the hell was that all about?
                                                            
                       WES
Would you want to be a Texas taxi
driver?
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Nope.
                                                            
                       WES
What time is it?
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Five thirty-nine.
                                                            
                       WES
Crazy how the night passes by...
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
What's there to do in Amarillo at
five thirty-nine in the morning?
                                                            
Wes sits and ponders.
                                                            
                       WES
I think I know something...
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Don't say strip club.
                                                            
Wes reaches into his back pocket and pulls out the folded
flyer from earlier. He hands it to Scotty, who looks it
over.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
O'Grady's Hotdogs?
                                                            
                       WES
      (Smiling)
Yeah.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Open twenty-four seven?
                                                            
                       WES
Yeah, times are tough.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
Where did you get this?
                                                            

57.

                       WES
A guy in a hotdog suit with a love
of pop music.
                                                            
                       SCOTTY
      (Sarcastically)
That's sexy.
                                                            
                       WES
That's what I thought.
                                                            
Wes and Scotty laugh as the sun slowly comes up.
                                                            


FADE OUT.


Back to Top of Page
Leave Feedback
Feedback
From vito jennette Date 12/16/2010 ***
Really enjoyed the script...Dialog was good, refreshing to read something so well structured! The ending was a nice surprise, and the story really flowed well. Not really sure the introduction of the saga was necessary though? Fell in love with the wes character. Funny as hell! If you get a chance two of my scripts are posted as well. Bullycide & The Second Coming


Back to Top of Page
Leave Feedback
You must be logged in to leave feedback.
Home    My Account    Products    Screenwriter Community    Screenwriter's Corner    Help
Forgot Your Password?    Privacy Policy    Copyright 2014, ScriptBuddy LLC.    Email help@scriptbuddy.com