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by bob (fender1056@yahoo.com)

Rated: PG   Genre: Comedy   User Review: 1/2


This screenplay is copyrighted to its author. All rights reserved. This screenplay may not be used or reproduced without the express written permission of the author.



FADE IN:

INT. GARAGE - DAY
                                                            
Its a thursday night at the house of PAUL ROCK, he is in his
garage with his friends MORGAN FULLER and JOHN KENNAN. There
are musical instruments lying around including guitars,
basses, and a drum set. They are sitting on amplifiers and
talking in fake British accents.
                                                            
                       PAUL
Hey John, what do you think we
should do now?
                                                            
                       JOHN
What do you mean what should we do
now? We should do what we're here
to do, and thats make some music!
                                                            
Morgan is lying down asleep in a pile of McDonald's bags and
candy rappers. Paul slowly moves closer to him and turns
the amplifier up to maximum volume and strums a chord on his
guitar. Morgan jumps up and screams.
                                                            
                       MORGAN
Bloody Hell! What the bollocks
dyo think you're doin? Trying to
blast me freakin ear drums out?
                                                            
John and Paul are cracking up laughing. Morgan is rubbing
his ears in pain and looks up at the clock.
                                                            
                       MORGAN
Hey, can you two blokes stop
laughing for a second? Have you
not noticed that George isn't here
yet? Where the heck is he? We
can't practice without George.
                                                            
                       JOHN
Hey, hey, hey, your right, where
the heck is that bloke?
                                                            
                       PAUL
Don't worry, i'm sure he's fine,
you know how he's always late for
everything, there's probobly a
perfectly good explanation for it!
                                                            
 

2.

EXT. ON A SIDEWALK - DAY
                                                            
George is running furiously down a sidewalk with a large man
not far behind chasing him.
                                                            
                       STORE CLERK
You come back here you little
pest! I'll kill you i swear I'll
kill you! No one steals from my
store! Go steal from somewhere
else!
                                                            
As George is running down the sidewalk CDs begin to fall
from his pants, he quickly stops to save some and recovers
and runs again.
                                                            
                       GEORGE
I'll never buy a CD! Never!
                                                            
George runs faster then ever and jumps a fence. The clerk
behind hits the fence and struggles to get over. George
turns to look around and smiles, pulling his pants up. He
runs into a nearbuy bush and hides. He is confindent that
he lost the clerk so he gets out of the bush and walks
confidently looking at a CD he stole. As he looks at the CD
he runs into the large store clerk who punches him in the
face.
                                                            
                       STORE CLERK
I'll teach you a lesson you little
punk! Come here, you want a CD
I'll give you a CD
                                                            
                       GEORGE
What are you talkin bout? I
didn't steal nothing!
                                                            
                       STORE CLERK
Oh yeah? Then whats this?
                                                            
The clerk pulls down George's pants and stacks of CDs fall
out.
                                                            
                       GEORGE
Ohhh, those CDs.... yeah i can
explain, you see, i think that...
um...Hey look its Donald Trump!
                                                            
The clerk turns around and George grabs a CD from the ground
and sprints away. He gets away from the clerk and makes it
to Paul's garage.
                                                            
 

3.

INT. PAUL'S GARAGE - DAY
                                                            
                       PAUL
Yeah, so anyways, I tell the guy,
I says to him, 'no way man, the
Beatles are the greatest rock band
in history, not air supply.'
                                                            
Theres a loud bang at the garage door that interrupts the
conversation.
                                                            
                       GEORGE
Open the door guys! Open the
freakin door!
                                                            
                       PAUL
Why should I? You know how late
you are? We've been waiting here
for atleast one hour.
                                                            
                       GEORGE
I'm sorry, just open the door, i
got you something.
                                                            
Paul moves to the door and opens it. George falls down
panting.
                                                            
                       PAUL
Awe man, whats up with that? What
happened to your face? Why do you
have black eye? Oh no.... you
didn't do what i think you did,
did you?
                                                            
Paul looks at George in a angry glare.
                                                            
                       GEORGE
Come on. Me stealing a CD is the
same thing as you downloading a
song! There's no difference!
Don't be a hyppocrite!
                                                            
                       PAUL
No it isn't! That's totally
different! What you doing is
illegal! I don't get caught, thus
it's legal. Oh, and by the way,
it's not 'illegaly dowloadin' its
called 'file sharing'.
                                                            
George gets up and goes to Paul's desk, picking up a can of
soda
                                                            

4.

                       GEORGE
Sharing huh, well i guess it's the
equivalent of me 'sharing' this
here coke. I guess i'll just take
a sip out of it, hey look we're
sharing!
                                                            
George runs into Paul's bathroom and shoves his toothbrush
into his mouth.
                                                            
                       GEORGE
Hey, looks we're sharing again!
Isn't sharing great?
                                                            
George runs into Paul's closet and takes some shirts and
pants and shoves them on his own, with the toothbrush still
in his mouth. The clothes rip as he struggles to put them
on.
                                                            
                       PAUL
Oh no, looks what you've done!
You've made a fool of everyone!
That's it you idiot! You fool!
You're out of the band!
                                                            
                       GEORGE
Sharing huh?
Interesting...sharing..
                                                            
George gets up and gives Paul the CD.
                                                            
                       GEORGE
Atleast I got a good one. 'The
Beatles.'
                                                            
Paul gives an approving nod to George and George smiles.
                                                            
                       PAUL
You're still out of the band, now
please leave with some amount of
dignity.
                                                            
                       GEORGE
What dignity?
                                                            
All the band members stare at George as he attempts to take
off the layers of clothes and underwear he put on.
                                                            
                       PAUL
Oh just keep them!
                                                            
George puts the ripped underwear he took off on his head,
and with straight proper posture exits the house.
                                                            

5.

                       MORGAN
Who's ready to make some musical
magic?!
                                                            
They all pick up their instruments and turn on there
equipment. There setting up and getting ready to jam.
                                                            
                       PAUL
Ready....1,2,1,2,3,4!
                                                            
They all begin to play and the power goes out, the room
darkens.
                                                            
                       MORGAN
You know George could fix this...
                                                            
                       PAUL
Oh shutup.
                                                            
 
EXT. OUTSIDE PAUL'S HOUSE - DAY
                                                            
George is walking all alone in his layers of ripped clothing
back to his own house. The sky begins to turn dark with
rain clouds. It begins to rain. As George is walking he
walks across a field of elementary students at soccer
practice. They all point and laugh at him. He starts to
run and he trips in a mud puddle. A tape falls out of his
pocket with the name of his band, 'The Gleapers" written on
it. He looks at it for alittle bit and reminisces about the
band. Then he throws it in the puddle and get up.
                                                            
 
INT. MCDONALDS - DAY
                                                            
George then goes into a McDonald's, orders his food and sits
down at an empty table to eat it. A girl is staring at him
and winks at him. He turns around to see if she is looking
at someone else, but he's the only one around. So he winks
back and smiles, drinking his soda seductively. The girl
laughs, so George does some more antics. He closes his eyes
and eats his fries in a very lude, gross way, licking them
all over. When he opens his eyes, theres a man sitting in
front of him who punches him and blackens his other eye.
                                                            
 
EXT. HIGHSCHOOL QUAD - DAY
                                                            
The three band members are eating lunch at school at a
table. No one else is at the table but them.
                                                            

6.

                       PAUL
So, i've given it a lot of
thought, and I know how we can get
our band signed to a record
'label. There's this giant
concert comming to town called
ultimaticoncertapallpoooza'. They
always hav local bands as the
opening act! All we have to do is
give the road manager our demo
tape, and it'll trickle up to the
CEO of the label, and we'll be
rich!
                                                            
                       MORGAN
And just how the hell do you think
our demo tape will get into the
hands of the right people? Do you
even know who runs the show, do
you think people even like our
music?! We don't even have a real
demo tape! You know George was
the expert on recording, how are
we supposed to make a demo
ourselves?
                                                            
Paul glares at Morgan and stares into the distance. He sees
George eating lunch alone at another table.
                                                            
                       PAUL
Let's start totally clean, lets
make a totally new tape, better
then the last. Who's George? We
don't need him. The Gleapers
don't need him. We'll make our
own demo tape and become huger
then we coulda ever been, without
him weighing us down.
                                                            
                       MORGAN
But George is our main singer,
what will we do without him?
                                                            
                       PAUL
Oh elementary my dear, innocent
Morgan, there's a whole world out
there you've never known.
                                                            
As they are eating lunch there is a girl performing a song
on stage in the quad. Paul signals for Morgan and John to
watch him. He sneeks up to the control panel of the sound
system hits it a few times. The sound comes off and the

7.

girls horrible voice can be heard. Everyone covers their
ears as her glass shattering voice ressinates through the
quad. Paul gives an evil stare to the band members and
slowly walks away.
                                                            
                       PAUL
It's called 'lip syncing'.
                                                            
George looks at Paul in astonishment and looks down.
                                                            
                       GEORGE
That creep.
                                                            
 
EXT. ULTIMACONCERTAPALLOOZA - DAY
                                                            
Paul, Morgan, and John all are walking in the parking lot of
the concert excited about the show. He runs into George and
his two new friends.
                                                            
                       PAUL
Well, well, well, what do we have
hear? If it isn't mister 'i have
no band'.
                                                            
                       GEORGE
Actually, i do have a band, meet,
alexei and magnuss.
                                                            
Alexei and Magnuss are wearing matching American Eagle
sweater vests and sunglasses. They put there hands out to
shake. John and Morgan are about to shake their hands when
Paul stops them.
                                                            
                       PAUL
Oh I hope you and your little
preppies aren't one of the local
bands trying out to play in
Ultimaconcertapallooza, we all no
the....
                                                            
                       GEORGE
We're called 'the Robbers'.
                                                            
                       PAUL
The 'robbers' have no chance
against the Gleapers.
                                                            
                       GEORGE
Pfff, whatever...
                                                            
Both bands walk away and go to the performance area where
they prepare to audition for the show.
                                                            
 

8.

INT. AUDITION ROOM - DAY
                                                            
John, Paul, and Morgan have their ears pressed up to the
door, trying to listen to the Robbers audition. The door
opens and they all fall down. The talent scout walks in and
directs both the Gleapers to come on stage. As they set up
their equipment, John nods to Paul and places presses play
on the prerecorded track. They begin to play and they
talent scout is very impressed. After they finish, the scout
jumps up onstage.
                                                            
                       TALENT SCOUT
You want the job, you got it!
                                                            
                       PAUL
you're kidding!
                                                            
                       TALENT SCOUT
Yes i am you guys were just
horrible. Next band!
                                                            
The stunned band walks off stage and meets the Robbers in
the other room.
                                                            
                       PAUL
So did you guys make it?
                                                            
                       GEORGE
Are you kidding? These guys just
learned how to play their
instruments 2 days ago.
                                                            
                       PAUL
Hey, um George....
                                                            
                       GEORGE
I know you were wondering if i
could come back to your band...
                                                            
                       PAUL
No actually ur wearing my jeans,
can i have them back please? Now!
                                                            
                       GEORGE
Fine!
                                                            
George tears off his jeans and gives them to Paul. He then
walks away pantless with his bandmates.
                                                            
 

9.

INT. PAUL'S GARAGE - DAY
                                                            
Paul, John, and Morgan are sitting down, lazily talking with
there instruments in hand.
                                                            
                       JOHN
You know it's just not the same
without George, i miss his frantic
knocking on the door. Don't you
miss seeing what he stole
everytime. Once remember,
everyday of the week he stole a
Aerosmith CD cuz he knew you liked
aerosmith? OR remember that one
time he stole all those backstreet
boys and britney spears CDs, we
still use them today as coasters
and paperweights.
                                                            
Suddenly there's a knock at the door. They all look at each
other. Paul goes to open the door. When he opens it
there's just a bum asking for some change, he gives him a
snickers bar and shoos him away. They all sit back down
depressed.
                                                            
                       PAUL
You know you're right, George
wasn't all that bad....i mean we
do need a singer. Sometimes i can
still here his stupid knocking on
the door, or his running from the
store clerk.
                                                            
As Paul is talking they hear those noises, and theres a
knock at the door. Paul opens the door and it's George. His
pants are full of CDs, but they're all burnt.
                                                            
                       GEORGE
Look Paul, I downloaded these
myself, now i file share!!!
                                                            
                       PAUL
Hey sorry about all those things i
said, you know The Gleapers just
aren't the same without you, will
you come back?
                                                            
                       GEORGE
Well I'd love to but you won't
believe who's chasing me, the RIAA
found out i was downloading music
illegaly, so now i'm screwed.
Close the door!
                                                            

10.

They all laugh and pick up there instruments and start play,
but the power goes out again.
                                                            


FADE OUT.


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From Tim Kotchetov Date 6/30/2008 *
Its a bit too corny for my taste

From Sven Date 6/17/2008 0 stars
The only good thing is that you can write a script, but can you write a story?! And you have mixed up 'hear' and 'here' in the wrong plaves!

From anthony Date 4/21/2005 1/2
he is a bit harsh, but he got a point

From S.M. Krause Date 3/30/2005 0 stars
This is one script I wouldn't have "shared" with SB reviewers. It's a stale attempt to make people laugh at the RIAA and illegal downloading of music. It's not funny, it's a boring story. Your characters are dumbed down versions of Bill without Ted, and the entire story (rather the 10 pages) is lavishly dull and doesn't attract an audience. Can't you see that? Stick to downloading illegal music, at least you're good at it.


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