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by Brian Devaney (btdevaney@capousd.org)

Rated:

Genre: Teen Movies User Review:

Two brothers compete to see who is the biggest stooge.

LAST LAUGH (SHORT)

FADE IN:

EXT. THE PIT - TUESDAY - LUNCH RECESS - DAY

MARK, RONNIE and KATIE are walking toward the pit talking
and eating little chocolate DOUGHNUTS.

KATIE
... but if we win the next one we
make playoffs. Uh, oh. Look who's
coming.

RONNIE
Wow Good luck with that!

From the other direction comes MIKE. While he's MARK's twin,
he looks very different; more hip. He has long sideburns, an
earring, Bono glasses. He's brimming with confidence,
carrying a crazy backpack and smiling, knowing he's going to
mess with these three friends.

MIKE
Hey look, it's the Three Stooges.
Moe, Larry and Girlie. What's up
little brother?

RONNIE
"Little Brother?" You were born 4
minutes before Mark.

Mike gives him a look and smacks him lightly on the forehead
with the palm of his hand as he seems to have done many
times before.

MIKE
But I'm sooo much cooler. Who
asked you anyway, messenger boy?

RONNIE
I'm not a messinger boy, I'm an
office aide.

MIKE
Yea. Like there's a differnce. Hey
Katie, I like those hotpants.

KATIE
They're soccer shorts, not
hotpants.

MIKE
On you, JockGirl, they're
HOTpants. Why are you wasting time
with my little brother, anyway?
You could do much better. Like me,
for example.

MARK
(Changing subject)
Mike, you done?

MIKE
I will be, after you give me one
of those doughnuts.

Mike gives him one, and as he passes by he pats Katie on her
bottom, causing her to jump and growl.

KATIE
Mark, he's pushed you around your
whole life and you just take it.
When are you going to stand up to
him?

MARK
(sheepishly)
Soon.

Mike takes a few steps away from them and turns to throw the
doughnut over their heads to hit the PROCTOR in the back.
The proctor turns, looks at the DOUGHNUT on the ground and
then the box of doughnuts in Mark's hand. He walks toward
the trio to bust them and does not look happy. The friends
looks around to find Mike but he is long gone.

KATIE
(disbelieving)
Soon, huh?

MARK
(determined)
Real soon.

EXT. FLAGPOLE - WED. 8:00 A.M. - DAY

Ronnie walks up to Mike as some of his friends are walking
away laughing.

RONNIE
That was a rotten thing you did to
your brother yesterday. He had to
pick up trash after school for two
hours because of you. He's always
(MORE)

RONNIE (cont'd)
taking the blame for what you do.

MIKE
He's got to learn to stand up for
himself. Think of it as a life
lesson. He'll thank me for it
someday. Where IS your girlfriend
anyway?

RONNIE
Katie isn't my girlfriend. She's
just a friend. I ...

MIKE
(interrupting)
No kidding- she's way too hot for
you. I didn't mean her, I meant my
twin sister, Mark. So what do you
want here? Shouldn't you be
delivering messages or something?

RONNIE
(brightening)
As a matter of fact that's why I'm
looking for Mark. I have a message
for him. Know where he is?

Ronnie holds up an ENVELOPE that looks like nice stationary.
In one quick swipe Mike takes it away. Ronnie tries to take
it back but Mike smacks him in the forehead.

RONNIE
Give it back! That's for Mark -
its personal.

MIKE
(growing sarcastic)
Chill out. I'll give it to him.
I'm heading to my photgraphy class
and that's right by his first
period trig. Who knows, maybe if I
practice real hard I can be a
messinger boy like you. Maybe you
can put it a good word for me.
Please?

RONNIE
You're hilarious. Just make sure
he gets right away. It's
important.

MIKE
I'll protect it with my life. Now
beat it.

He moves to bop Ronnie on the head one more time, just for
the heck of it, but Ronnnie dodges it for once and leaves on
the double. Mike examines the envelope with the word "MARK"
written on it.

INT. MCCREA'S ROOM -11:45 AM - DAY

Mike is anxiously looking at the clock while Mr. McCrae is
teaching. When it hits 11:45 Mike instantly makes a
distressed face and raises his hand.

MR. MCCREA
Yes, Mike. What is it?

MIKE
(whining, gagging)
Mr. McCrea, I don't feel good. I
feel like I'm going to throw up or
something. Can I go to the office?

MR. MCCREA
Please don't get sick in here.
Here's the pass. Hurry.

Mike leaves bent over, holding his stomach.

INT. HALLWAY - 11:46 AM - DAY

Mike stands up straight and laughs. He poses his hands as if
holding a statue, walks and talks out loud to the empty
hall.

MIKE
I'd like to thank the Academy and
everyone who voted for me. Hmmm.
You know this really is heavy.

EXT. WOLVERINE WAY, OUTSIDE OF HALL 11:46 - DAY

Mike is still cracking himself up as he comes through the
hallway doors and spots Ronnie coming toward him holding a
yellow note. He doesn't slow as he pops Ronnie on the
forehead and keeps walking. He's going somewhere in a hurry.

RONNIE
Ouch. Did you give your brother
the message?

MIKE
(over his shoulder)
Sorry. Gotta go. No time to talk.
Got any breath spray? No?
Figures. (Laughs)

EXT. CAMPUS 11:53 AM - DAY

MIKE has a spring in his step as he crosses the campus
headed toward the football stadium.

EXT. STADIUM 11:53 - DAY

Mike enters the stadium and turns for the hometeam
bleachers. He leaves the walkway and heads under the
benches.

EXT. PROCTORMOBILE- 11:54 - DAY

The PROCTOR gets a call on his WALKIE-TALKIE. He listens,
says something and drives away.

EXT. UNDER THE BLEACHERS 11:56 AM - DAY

MIKE is sitting in the shade under the bleachers and looks
at his watch.

EXT. OUTSIDE OF THE CHOIR ROOM - 11:56 AM - DAY

RONNIE is standing with one hand behind his back and the
other looking at his watch which also reads 11:56. The
PROCTORMOBILE pulls up to him.

EXT. STADIUM 11:58 - DAY

The PROCTORMOBILE speeds up to the stadium at it's maximum 6
miles an hour and slams on the brakes. The PROCTOR gets out
and walks the same path that Mike took. He does not look as
happy as Mike did.

EXT. UNDER THE BLEACHERS 11:59 AM - DAY

MIKE looks at his watch and see it is one minute until
12:00. He seems excited and turns expectantly but is
surprised to see the PROCTOR. Mike's face drops but he pulls
it together, stands up and walks toward the Proctor, his
look changing to one of concern.

MIKE
Man, I'm glad you're here. I was
about to give up.

PROCTOR
I think giving up is the best idea
you've had all day.

MIKE
You don't get it. I lost my
sunglasses and somebody told me
that they saw them under here but
I've been looking for about, what
time is it? It's almost 12:00.
I've been looking for about 10
minutes and can't find them
anywhere. Can you help me look?

PROCTOR
(pointing)
Maybe they're in your backback
over there?

Mike can't believe it when he sees his backpack 15 feet away
from him.

MIKE
WHAT?! How did that get here? That
can't be mine. What's going on?

PROCTOR
Not yours? Well then, you won't
object if I look inside so we can
find out whose it is. Well, look
here. "Mike London" It's your
binder. You wouldn't lie to me,
would you Mikey?

MIKE
You're nuts. This whole thing is
nuts. This is impossible. I swear
that was not here a minute ago.
You gotta believe me. I have no
idea what is going on here.

Something catches Mike's attention through the cracks in the
bleachers and he moves closer to get a better look. He sees
someone running very fast out of the stadium. One second
later the runner is out of sight. Gone.

MIKE
Give me a second. Let me think.
How'd my backpack get...

WOOOSSSHHH!

EXT. FLASHBACK FLAGPOLE - WED. 8:00 A.M. - DAY

Music plays as Ronnie again ducks the slap and walks away.
Mike turns toward his class holding the envelope. This time
he opens it and reads:

KATIE (V.O)
Dear Mark,
We never get the chance to be
alone. Meet me today at 12:00
under the bleachers. Maybe we can
figure out a way to get back at
your brother. We have got to
teach him a lesson. Anyway, I
can't wait to see you. I'm
counting the minutes until noon.
Love, Katie

Mike gets and evil grin on his face and stuffs the note in
the front pocket of his backpack.

MIKE
Tough luck, stooges. I'm always
one step ahead of you.

WHOOOSSHH!

EXT. FLASHBACK-WOLVERINE WAY, OUTSIDE OF HALL 11:46 - DAY

MUSIC plays as we once again see MIKE walk by RONNIE and pop
him on the head. MIKE leaves asking for gum over his
shoulder and Ronnie steps over to the mens room, pushes the
door open with his right hand, holding a YELLOW SLIP in his
left. he says something, and then continues into the hall.

WOOOSSSHHH!

INT. FLASHBACK MCCREA'S ROOM -11:47 AM - DAY

MUSIC plays as RONNIE enters MCCRAE's room and gives him a
YELLOW NURSE'S PASS. The teacher points and Ronnie goes and
picks up Mike's BACKPACK and leaves.

WOOOSSSHHH!

EXT. FLASHBACK STADIUM 11:58 - DAY

MUSIC plays while in the stands, someone's hands stuff
Mike's BACKPACK between benches of the bleachers until it
disappears.

WHOOOSSHH1

EXT. FLASHBACK UNDER THE BLEACHERS 11:59 AM - DAY

MUSIC plays as Mike's BACKPACK drops from above and lays in
the dirt beneath the bleachers.

EXT. UNDER THE BLEACHERS 12:01 PM - DAY

MIKE
I know how it got here. It must
have been Ronnie. He took it from
McCrea's class and put it here
when I wasn't looking.

PROCTOR
Think again. I saw Ronnie near the
pit on my way over here. No way he
beat me here. He's a nice guy and
all, but not the most athletic guy
I know.

"Athletic" rings a bell and Mike looks back at the stadium
gate through the crack.

WHOOOOSSH!

EXT. FLASHBACK OUTSIDE OF THE CHOIR ROOM - 11:56 AM - DAY

MUSIC plays as RONNIE sees it is 11:56 and the PROCTORMOBILE
again pulls up to beside him. This time the PROCTOR's asking
Ronnie something. He gestures sideburns and an ear ring and
Ronnie points to the Stadium. The Proctor pulls away in the
direction of the parking lot. Not 1 second later Ronnie
pulls Mike's BACKPACK from behind his back and holds it at

arms length. Out of no where streaks KATIE, and without
breaking her stride she grabs the backpack and runs like the
wind along the campus side of the Gym building.

WHOOOSSSHH!

EXT. FLASHBACK THE ROAD TO THE STADIUM - DAY

MUSIC plays as the Proctor drives in the parking lot as
Katie runs along the blacktop and softball field, hopping
fences and staying out of sight. She hops the final fence
just as the proctor enters the stadium.

WHOOOSSSHH!

EXT. FLASHBACK STADIUM 11:58 - DAY

MUSIC plays as KATIE runs up the bleachers and stuffs the
BACKPACK between the benches. The PROCTOR is too busy
heading under the bleachers to notice KATIE to his right.

WHOOOSSSHH!

EXT. FLASHBACK UNDER THE BLEACHERS 11:59 AM - DAY

MUSIC plays as the PROCTOR, exactly like before, surprises
MIKE sitting under the bleachers. Only this time we see the
BACKPACK fall to earth behind MIKE as he stands up.

WHOOOSSH!

EXT. UNDER THE BLEACHERS 12:02 PM - DAY

MIKE
That's it! Don't you see? Katie
must have been in on it too.
That's the only explaination.

PROCTOR
Reeaalllly? I guess they must have
put the teachers' shoes in there
too.

MIKE
Shoes? What are you talking about?

The PROCTOR pulls out SHOES from the BACKPACK and shows them
to a bewildered MIKE.

10.

PROCTOR
There are three shoes in your
backpack. And I'm willing to bet
that they each match one that is
on the foot of 3 angry teachers
back in the 300 hallway. I guess
Ron and Katie put THEM there too.
Wow, they went to a lot of trouble
to frame you. You poor thing, they
must really have it out for you.

MIKE
I don't know anything about any
shoes but if they're in the bag,
I'm sure it must have been those
two that put them there. They're
probably ticked off about that
doughnut thing yesterday.

PROCTOR
So it was you! I should have
known. That was my own fault for
mistaking your brother for you. I
won't do that again.

MIKE
(dreamily)
Mistaking my brother for me...

WHOOOSSHH!

EXT. FLASHBACK WOLVERINE WAY, OUTSIDE OF HALL 11:46 - DAY

Again, MUSIC plays as we see MIKE walk by RONNIE and pop him
on the head. Mike leaves asking for gum over his shoulder
and Ronnie steps over to the mens room, pushes the door open
with his right hand a YELLOW SLIP in his left. This time we
see into the bathroom. There stands MARK looking into the
mirror touching his face.

INT. FLASHBACK BOY'S RESTROOM - 11:46 AM - DAY

The MUSIC continues as MARK finishes putting on the fake
SIDEBURNS below his clip-on EAR RING and checks his watch.
11:46. He puts on Mike's GLASSES. Checks his look in the
mirror, takes a deep breath and leaves.

WHOOOSSHH!

11.

INT. FLASHBACK HALLWAY - 11:47 AM - DAY

The MUSIC continues as we see MARK/MIKE walk down the hall
and take Mike's BACKPACK from RONNIE coming the opposite
direction from McCrea's room. MARK/MIKE takes Mike's CAMERA
from his pack and puts it around his neck.
He turns and puts his hand on the doorknob of Room 305.

INT. FLASHBACK ROOM 305 - 11:47 AM - DAY

"Mike" enters teacher A's class with the camera around his
neck.

TEACHER A
Can I help you?

MARK/MIKE
(slick sales-like)
As a matter of fact, you can. I'm
with the yearbook and, as you can
probably tell, I am the style
editor. We're doing a section on
footwear and I would like to do a
page on teacher's shoes. I was
wondering if you would let me take
a picture of one of your shoes.

TEACHER A
My shoe? You want to take a
picture of my shoe? Why MY shoe?

MARK/MIKE
I think its obvious. You're like
me, you have style. C'mon take off
your shoe, it will only take a
second.

The class starts calling out encouragement and TEACHER A
shrugs, smiles and takes off her shoe. She gives it to
MARK/MIKE and he puts it on the desk and starts focusing his
camera. Something doesn't appeal to him and he walks around
and adjusts his camera and tries again. Still no good. He
looks up at the lights, around the room, back through the
lens. Something's just not right.

MARK/MIKE
The light in this room stinks.
Okay if take this out into the sun
to shoot it? Your room is too dark
and my flash is broken. I'll have
it back to you in two minutes.
Really. You won't even know it's
(MORE)

12.

MARK/MIKE (cont'd)
gone.

TEACHER A
I feel ridiculous. I hope I don't
have a hole in my sock. OK. Its
11:48. You have it back here in
two minutes or I'm hobbling after
you.

MARK/MIKE
(Leaving)
Thanks. I appreciate it. Believe
me, it's for the good of the
school.

WHOOOSSHH!

INT. FLASHBACK ROOM 307 - 11:49 - DAY

The MUSIC returns as MARK/MIKE is handed TEACHER B's SHOE.
He glances up at the wall clock. Its 11:49.

WHOOOSSSHH!

EXT. FLASHBACK ROOM 309 - 11:50 AM - DAY

MUSIC is playing as MARK/MIKE waves SHOE 3 to thank TEACHER
3 as he exits Room 309. A quick look at the clock sees it
change from 11:50 to 11:51. Right on schedule.

EXT. FLASHBCAK WOLVERINE WAY, OUTSIDE OF HALL 11:52 - DAY

MUSIC plays as MARK/MIKE sticks the CAMERA in the BACKPACK
with the shoes. He hands the pack to RONNIE and heads back
to class as Ronnie walks quickly toward the pit.MARK/MIKE
removes his costume pieces and shoves them in his pockets,
transforminng back to plain old MARK.

WHOOOSSHH!

INT. FLASHBACK ROOM 402 - 11:53 AM - DAY

The MUSIC plays as MIKE enters and places the HALL PASS back
on the TEACHER 4's desk. Immediately, KATIE's hand shoots
up to use it next. The teacher motions her to wait until he
finishes the point he is writing on the board. She nervously
looks at MARK and then the clock. Its 11:53.

13.

WHOOOSSHH!

INT. FLASHBACK ROOM 402 - 11:55 AM - DAY

The MUSIC plays but TEACHER 4 is still rambling on. KATIE
and MARK are exchanging nervous looks. Katie stands and
Teacher 4 motions for her to sit back down. It is now or
never. Katie points to the door and plays the "female card."
No teacher can stand up against the "girl thing" and he
reluctantly hands her the HALL PASS. She bolts out the door.
Mark looks at the clock, worried. It is 11:55

EXT. FLASHBACK OUTSIDE OF THE CHOIR ROOM - 11:56 AM - DAY

MUSIC plays and KATIE is flying through the breezeway by
guidance and sees that she is about to run full speed into
the PROCTORMOBILE. There is nothing she can do about it now.
RONNIE points and the PROCTOR pulls away clearing a path
for Katie to zoom by. Just in time, Ronnie holds out the bag
and off she goes.

WHOOOSSHH!

EXT. UNDER THE BLEACHERS 12:03 PM - DAY

MIKE
Un-be-liev-a-ble! They set me up.
My brother and his friends took my
backpack and set me up. That's it!
I can prove it. My backpack was in
McCrea's room when I left. I
never went back. Explain that!

The PROCTOR is continuing to rummage through the backpack:
BINDER, SHOES, CAMERA. He unzips the front pouch, looks up
and shows a handful of YELLOW NURSE PASSES.

PROCTOR
My guess is that if we look on Mr.
McCrea's desk, we'll find one of
these slips, filled out in your
handwriting, requesting your
backpack so that you can go home
sick. What do you think?

WHOOOSSHH!

14.

EXT. FLASHBACK OUTSIDE OF THE CHOIR ROOM - 11:55 AM - DAY

MUSIC plays as RONNIE puts some YELLOW NURSE PASSES into the
front pouch of the BACKPACK and zips it up. He looks up in
time and hides the bag behind his back, and as we saw
before, checks his watch - its 11:56, and talks to the
proctor.

WHOOOSSHH!

EXT. UNDER THE BLEACHERS 12:04 PM - DAY

MIKE
It wouldn't surprise me if that's
exactly what you found. Would you
mind showing me the Nurse's note
if McCrea still has it? I'd like
to see what kind of forgery job
they did. My brother's handwriting
already looks like mine. However,
I must admit, the blank passes
were a nice touch.

PROCTOR
Give it up Mike. Do you really
expect anybody will believe your
conspiracy theory? You "just
happened" to be hiding under the
bleachers with a "planted" bag of
stolen shoes. Gimme a break...

MIKE
(interrupting)
HA! That's it. I wasn't hiding
here. I was tricked into coming
here and I can prove it! This time
I've got them. Gimme the backback.
I'm not going to do anything. OK,
I'm just going to get something
out of it that will prove why I'm
here in the first place. When you
see this, you'll see exactly what
those three are really like.

THE PROCTOR isn't sure he wants to let go of the evidence so
he holds on to the BACKPACK straps and watches suspiciously
as MIKE unzips the front pouch and pulls out an ENVELOPE.
Mike shakes the letter toward the proctor but stops talking
when he really takes a close look at the front. It says
"MIKE." But he could have sworn it said "MARK." Uh-oh.

WHOOOSSHH!

15.

EXT. FLASHBACK OUTSIDE OF THE CHOIR ROOM - 11:55 AM - DAY

RONNIE unzips Mike's BACKPACK and removes MARK'S LETTER. He
replaces it with one addressed to "MIKE." He looks up and
see the PROCTORMOBILE some distance away. Then,as we have
seen before, Ronnie puts YELLOW NOTES in the pouch, zips up
and hides it behind his back.

SWOOOSSHH!

EXT. UNDER THE BLEACHERS 12:04 PM - DAY

MIKE surrenders. He knows he's been beaten. He opens the
ENVELOPE flap and slowly slides out the card. A big smile
grows on his face as he recognizes who is on this
black-and-white, picture postcard. The faces of the great
THREE STOOGES grin back at him. On the back, written in a
handwriting that looks very much like his but he knows to be
his brother's, are three words:
"NYUCK, NYUCK, NYUCK"
THE PROCTOR sees the photo too and laughs.

PROCTOR
(pointing)
THAT'S who your brother and his
friends are really like? That's
not too bad at all. Sure, people
give'em a hard time, but they
stick together, and you just know
whoever messes with them is
eventually going to end up with a
pie in the face. That's my
favorite part. The payback. Those
guys are pretty good, you know?

MIKE looks at the PROCTOR sideways, wondering what he meant
by that. Had the proctor believed Mike, and was enjoying
watching him squirm? Either way, Mike knows he is going to
do some heavy time for this one.

MIKE
Yeah, I think I'm starting to
appreciate them too.

They both walk back to the PROCTORMOBILE as THE THREE
STOOGES THEME plays.

THE END

Feedback

From parker mathewson	Date 1/9/2008
I can feel the connection, and the chemistry is just great between the characters. It feels that they are actually real

From Daniel	Date 1/9/2008
wow i thought it was a movie

From Nick	Date 1/2/2008
I like it. It reminds me of oceans 11 and mission impossible. I like movies that make you think.

From Kelsey	Date 12/18/2007
That's pretty good, actually. I like it.

From Brian James Boles	Date 8/29/2006
i THOUGHT THE STORY HAD A GOOD PACE.

From J.J	Date 4/5/2006
I really didn't like this screenplay. Sorry, but it just wasn't interesting enough. If I was a producer, I would have put it down after the 3rd page. It got EXTREMELY annoying with you putting the time in the slugline. I suggest you read some of your favorite movies scripts, wich can probably be found on www.simplyscripts.com and see how improve your writing style.

From Westin Sandberg	Date 3/22/2006
I must say you have an interesting concept... but, how the anatagonist finds out what Mark and company did makes no sense, how would Mike be able to see Marks flashback, and the Proctor would not be able to see the flashbacks... you can do much better, but any good writer knows to rarely use flashbacks...

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