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Roger and Blake (short)
by Anthony Violante (adamwest52@aol.com)

Rated: R   Genre: Comedy   User Review:

short script i wrote in an hour. two guys go to the library to pick up girls. i'm a young writer (18) and if you have any comments please feel free to speak them. thank you - AV

This screenplay is copyrighted to its author. All rights reserved. This screenplay may not be used or reproduced without the express written permission of the author.



ROGER ANEMONE is lying down on his bed, starring at the
ceiling. BLAKE VALENTINE is reading a dirty magazine on a
computer chair.
you know ..... i'm not sure im
into the chick wiht a dick
you were into it in the first
well yea.... i mean not ME and a
chick with the meat.... a girl and
a gril with the meat...
thats like girl/guy...
yea but i like titties,and guys
dont have um.... it's like you got
the best of everything.....
so why did you say your not sure
you like it anymore?
cause last night i was tug'in it,
and just before i cum, it cuts to
a shot of the dick....and just
that....no sucking, no nothing....
so it was the last thing in my
head befor i came....and that's
gross, i mean i got no problem
with the whole gay thing....but
not with me.... i dig pussy


but the chick had a dick....
true, but the girl she was fucking
your fucked up
so says the man who was into being
I'm not into it.. all i said was
that i was with my girlfriend she
was on top... and she pushed down
on my shoulders for leverage, and
then she got closer to my neck and
ended up kinda choking me .... she
didnt do it on purpose, and i dont
even think she knows what she was
doing...but she was choking me..
.and all i said was that it didnt
feel all that good....but it didnt
feel all to bad either...
hey whatever man....and how is
Sarah anyway?
i dont wanna talk about it...
why, what is it this time?
the fuck does that mean "this
dude, i dont mean anything bad by
this.....but that broad is a
twisted cunt...
you better watch that cum trap


i'm sorry, but it's like every
other day she's mad at you for
this, pissed off at that... and
every time she has no real good
reason for being upset... it's
like she just wants to be in a
pissy mood all the time.
oh come on....
tell me i'm wrong. tell me she's
not mad at you... tell me that and
i'll give you my first born...
why the fuck would i want that?
fine...fifty bucks.... tell me
she's not mad and you get fifty
ok fine... she is mad
ah i knew it....what is it this
time...did she see some girl you
might have liked?
no that was last week, this time
she claims she saw me in a
a what?
yea... she said that she saw me in
some fucking college-porn...
and you said?....


first i questioned as to why she
was watching the thing in the
first place...only to get further
bitching about how i dont spend
enough time with her... and
finally i had to show her the
reality of the matter
what did you say...
i said "hey, if i dont have enough
time to see you then how the hell
would i find the time to do a
porno?" ...
wait wait wait.... so instead of
telling her that it's ridiculous
that she would even think that you
were in one.. and that you would
never do that... your only
reasoning was that you could never
find the time?
yea... pretty much
what did she say?
i dont know, she just yelled and
after she called me a twat i zoned
that bitch is crazy
yea i know, but what am i gunna
gee... break up with her maybe
well, she kind of broke up with me
for like the 33rd time. soo i
guess we're "seperated"...


Thats great!!
my girlfriend breaking up with me
is great?
you bet your ass it is. now you've
got the one thing people been
fighting for since we could walk
stop it...
No, your finally free from the
clutches of that siren. and you've
been sucked back in too many
times....but not this time.
because i have just the remedy for
this situation...
and what would that be?
a hook-up
i'm not kissing you
no, asshole. you ned to hook-up
with another girl. play the feild.
then you'll realize what your
missing and wont want to be tied
down anymore. and i know just the
ROGER and BLAKE are standing in a row of books. we look at
the from behind more books. they move about like lions in
the wild.


the library?
what, what , what?
well, frankly, your a bit of a
yeah. thanks
i'm not using that term negativly,
i'm just saying... you are a
little bit, and you need to go
somewhere to find a girl within
your league.
at the library?
at the library.
ROGER looks around upset & confused
look given the season and
situation at the time this is
honestly our best bet.
i don't even know what to say to
don't say shit to me, say shit to
one of the girls in here. but we
have to find the right one.
they end at a table and sit down.
ok...what about her?
BLAKE slaps his hand down.


the fuck was that for?
what are you five? no pointing.
and besides, she's a no go
why not? she's cute.
look at the book she's reading.
"crime scene analizes"
now there are two red flags with
that one. one, crime scene photos
of close up gunshots to the face,
aren't exactly erotic. so she's
more than likely not turned on at
all and the last thing from her
mind is cock. and two, if she is
turned on by that shit there is no
way in hell you'd want to go near
ok...what about the blonde over
      (finds blonde,
       thinks, then nods
oh, what is it this time?
did you even look at her book?
what the fuck is it with the
books? what do they have to do
with anything.


well,given the venue, they have to
do with everything. because what
ever is in that book is what's on
there mind. and the blonde is
reading "the devil wears prada"
and quite frankly i have no idea
what the hell that even means. so
its best to steer clear.
your actling like we're in a mine
brother, you've been in a
relationship for too long, you've
forgotten what it's like.
her who?
the brunette with the glasses.
she's perfect.
why her?
BLAKE gives ROGER a look.
her book?
"the final rendezvous".... the
fuck is that?
judging by the half naked woman on
the cover, its a romance novel.
meaning that there are sex scenes
in it. and she's about a little
more than halfway through, so
she's at the good stuff. that's a


so in theory if she;s at a sex
scene, she;s thinking about sex?
uh-huh, her panties are acting as
a dam ready to pop. and you my
friend are the little dutch boy
about to but his finger in it.
so what now?
go talk to her.
and what the hell would i say?
i dunno. compliment her. then get
into some small talk. loaded with
double entendres and innuendoes.
be confident but dont act like a
what? this is stupid.
just go talk to her.
ROGER gets up and goes to talk to the girl. he sits next to
her and they converse. we can't hear what they are saying.
we cut back and forth between them and BLAKE. BLAKE checks
his watch - 2:36
BRUNETTE WITH THE GLASSES grabs ROGERS hand and leads him
into a closet.
holy shit it worked...
we cut between them getting down and BLAKE. BLAKE looks at
his watch during these cuts, we start at 2:53 and end at
ROGER and the BRUNETTE WITH THE GLASSES come walking out,
both are a bit desheveled , ROGER has a few hickey's amd
bite marks on his neck. his belt is undone and he has "sex
hair". he sits back down with BLAKE,who by now is drinking


coffee. the BRUNETTE WITH THE GLASSES sits back and go's on
about her day.
whoaaaa... details, details.
wow.. i can't even begin to tell
thats ok, i'll give you time to
find your words. meantime let's
hit up the catolic highschool, St.
Anthony's lets out about now.
big dog gotta eat.
the two get up and walk out PULP FICTION style.


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