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Return to Sender.
by Darragh Clancy (clancy.darragh@gmail.com)

Rated: R   Genre: Horror   User Review:

This is a script for a short story I wrote as part of a college project. It works best as viewed as the type of story you would see on Anthology shows such as Tales from the Crypt or The Twilight zone.

This screenplay is copyrighted to its author. All rights reserved. This screenplay may not be used or reproduced without the express written permission of the author.


A young woman named LYNDSEY KELLY sits on her bed holding
her head in obvious despair.The door leading to the bedroom
is open just enough to let a sliver of light through. A
number of phone messages can be heard from an answering
machine in the adjoining room.
                       LYNDSEYS MOTHER.
Lyndsey this is your mother.
Your father and I are very worried
about your behavior lately.
We think you should see a doctor.
Just call us and let us and let us
know you are OK.
                       PHONE MESSAGE 2.
Lyndsey it's John that cheque you
wrote me for the rent bounced.
If the full amount is not in my
hand by Monday morning I'll have
to rent the room to someone else.
Call me immediately.
                       PHONE MESSAGE 3.
You better pick up that phone you
fucking slut!
My birds doing her nut 'cause of
you and if you don't fucking sort
out this fucking situation I'll go
around there and cave your fucking
head in. Do you fucking hear me?
While Lyndsey sits on the bed she wraps a pillowcase around
her head and begins screaming at the top of her voice.
What do you want from me?
For Christ's sake just leave me


Simon Adams sits in his well lit office talking on the phone
with one of his clients.He is an extremely well groomed man
in his early thirties.The room itself is a typical office
with a laptop, leather chair, phone and a coat stand. There
is little about the room to distinguish it from any of the
other offices on that floor.
Frank you just leave the ins and
outs to me. What the clients don't
know can't hurt them.Long as the
accounts add up nobody will be
none the wiser my man.
Simon hangs up the phone and chuckles to himself.
Grow a pair.
He picks up the telephone and dials an in house number.
Cheryl its Si.
Listen I'm just grabbing a quick
brunch with the war office.
Anybody important calls take their
details and I'll get back to them.
Anybody else calls tell them I'm
in Haiti to help the locals with
earthquake relief.
Cheers babe.
Simon checks his watch before getting up from his chair and
grabbing his coat.Before exiting the office he catches a
glimpse of his reflection and smirks to himself before
pointing his fingers at the mirror in a gun shape and taking
a shot before blowing away the imaginary smoke.
Simon passes a number of well dressed men and women all
going about their daily business.He is walking towards the
lift when he notices his boss MR BRANNIGAN walk out of his
office and address him.Brannigan is a short stout man in his
late fifties early sixties.He like all the other people in
the building is extremely well dressed in a hand made suit.


                       MR. BRANNIGAN.
Adams you contrary bastard!
How are you my boy.
Very good Mr Brannigan sir.
                       MR. BRANNIGAN.
Knock off that sir shite.
This isn't the military .
I've just got off the phone with
Kavanagh he tells me he is more
than satisfied with your initial
investments.He asked me to
congratulate you personally.
I'm glad he agrees with my
decisions.The client always knows
best after all.
                       MR. BRANNIGAN.
The client usually couldn't find
his arsehole if he had both hands
in his back pockets.
Keep up the sterling work.
Thank you Mr. Brannigan.
How's your wife by the way?
                       MR. BRANNIGAN.
Determined to put me in the
Not only that she insists I take
on our fucking mongoloid son as a
junior partner.
I swear to fucking Christ that boy
is so dumb I'd need to hire an
instructor to show him how to pick
the peanuts out of his own shite.
Family eh Gods fucking gift to us
Simon begins to move along when his boss stops him once
                       MR. BRANNIGAN.
One more thing Simon.
We have an important client flying
in today from Geneva.
I'm letting you handle her
account.You do well on this my boy
and the sky is the fucking limit


                       MR. BRANNIGAN. (cont'd)
for you.
Simon smiles and adjusts his collar as Brannigan retreats
back into his office.
Simon makes his way through the corridor towards the
reception area where he stops to flirt with the PRETTY
Morning Simon.
      (In a dreadful
       Scottish accent.)
Morning Miss Moneypenny.
Fancy taking a spin in my new
Aston Martin Convertible.
We could ski the alps or hit the
casinos in Monte Carlo.
Oh James you really are too much
for a humble girl like me.what
would your girlfriend have to say
about this?
One of Simon's colleagues Kenny Edwards interrupts his
unimaginative banter.
Sorry Simon?
Could I have a minute.
Simon rolls his eyes at Kenny's interruption.
I knew this day was going to well.
What is it Kenny?
Did you want to regale me with
tales about your exciting weekend
playing world of Warcraft?
Not exactly.
It was about the Quinn account.


What about it?
Simon's eyes narrow.
He was my client.I introduced him
to the company and it should have
been me who closed the account.
I'm sorry darling I didn't realize
I hurt your little feelings?
How about I buy you a nice drink
of warm milk while I open a nice
big can of "COULDN'T GIVE A FUCK".
If he was your client you should
have dealt with his account
If you've any problems take it up
with Mr.Brannigan.
Simon turns his back on Kenny before blowing a kiss to the
Secretary and walking out the front door.Kenny's eyes follow
Simon out the door with a look of pure hatred.
In a crowded upmarket cafe Simon sits across from his
attractive girlfriend CHRISTINA HUMPHREY looking at his
reflection on a spoon and brushing his hair back.The cafe is
busy due to the Mid day rush hour.Christina is surrounded by
bags of clothes from an expensive department store.She is
reading the latest copy of "Hooray" magazine and is looking
very irritated.
I can't believe it.
I mean would you look at this
Christine shows the spread to a disinterested Simon who is
still entranced in his own reflection.
I mean you can only see half my
face and who do they feature?
Fucking Simone Courtney?
I didn't know sucking off half the
Irish Rugby team was the way into


                       CHRISTINE. (cont'd)
the in crowd.
I would have got full spread if
her big ass hadn't taken up sooo
much space and it's so obvious her
tits are fake.
I mean mine are too but I had a
much better surgeon.
I'm so disgusted I can barely eat.
The embarrassment of it all.
Simon's attention is drawn to a petite DARK HAIRED
WOMEN(Lyndsey Kelly) sitting at an adjacent table chatting
to the waiter who she seems to know well.The waiter
continues taking orders from other patrons as the Women
exits the venue looking in rapid succession from her handbag
back to the table.Simon glances at the table and notices she
left behind a silver piece of jewelry.
Were you looking at that girl over
No don't be silly.
Why would I look at her when I've
got you honey?
Anyway what where you saying?
I said Saoirse and Lorcan have
invited us around to do come dine
with me on Friday night and I
He notices as she exits the cafe that she has left a
mysterious object on the table.
Simon jumps up from the table and grabs the Silver broach
before shouting after the women.
Excuse me miss?
The Dark haired women exits the shop not hearing Simon call
her name. Simon sits back down and begins looking at the
brooch and admiring its carvings and unusual design.
He holds the object closely to his ear and it seems to play
a mellow symphony that fills him with inner delight.


You really made the effort there.
You could at least go after her.
I'll leave it with the waiter, he
seems to know her.
Unless you want it of course?
Christina takes the brooch and studies it.
She seems unaware of the musical tune it plays.
Sorry babe I don't do silver.
Simon waves down a taxi and knocks an EXTRAVAGANTLY DRESSED
WOMEN to the ground who was also waiting by the side of the
                       EXTRAVAGANTLY DRESSED WOMEN.
Excuse moi monsieur!!!
Fuck off you cheese eating
surrender monkey!
Simon jumps into the taxi and sticks to fingers up at the
woman in a mocking fashion.The woman looks at Simon with a
mixture of shock and disbelief.
Simon checks his wallet before fumbling in his pockets for
change.He takes out the broach and feels it vibrate in his
hands suddenly a car pulls a U-Turn in front of Simon's taxi
causing a head on collision.Simon sits in the back seat of
the car in absolute shock as the driver leaps out of the car
and starts arguing with the driver who has just hit him.


                       MR. BRANNIGAN.
And that as the Bishop said to the
actress is as far as its going to
Mr Brannigan holds court with the board of directors as
Simon walks into the room sweating profusely and looking
Sorry I'm late everyone.
There was an accident and ...
Simon notices the woman to Brannigan's Immediate right was
the woman he knocked over running for the taxi.They both
lock eyes as she stares back at him with utter contempt.
Simon stands outside Mr Brannigan's office with his hands in
his pockets.He can see Brannigan apologizing to the visiting
V.I.P through the glass in the door.She thanks him and
leaves as she exits.Simon bows his head in shame and
embarrassment as she exits.
Brannigan looks out at the city through the blinds in his
window before sitting down and looking sternly at Simon who
sits still looking at his feet like a child in the
headmasters office.Mr Brannigan takes a bottle of Scotch
whiskey out from under his desk and pours both himself and
Simon a glass.
                       MR. BRANNIGAN.
It's at times like this a smoke
and a stiff drink are in order.
I think I'll pass.


                       MR. BRANNIGAN.
Drink it.
When you hear what I have to say
you'll probably wish you had
something even stronger.
Whats going on?
                       MR. BRANNIGAN.
The Hutchinson account from last
The revenue are all over it.
Some fuckwit leaked a file and now
some knight in shining armor has
made it his business to fuck up
Your name has come up in the
ensuing investigation.
Oh fuck.
                       MR. BRANNIGAN.
It seems one Mr Hutchinson was
working for a character by the
name of "Pops" Delaney a nefarious
sort with interests in the drug
trade when he contacted you.
It seems that property investment
you arranged for him was financed
with drug money.
He never mentioned this Delaney
character to you did he?
He used to boast about his
connections all the time.
I never took him seriously .
I knew he had to get the money
from somewhere but it was hardly
my problem was it?
Brannigan produces a file from his desk and places it on the
                       MR. BRANNIGAN.
You had an inkling he was involved
in money laundering and you turned
a blind eye.
That's the way the law views it.


Simon nearly chokes on his drink as he listens to his boss.
I cant believe this is happening to me are the only words he
can think of but dare not utter out loud.
                       MR. BRANNIGAN.
You're not the first person to
take a little reward under the
counter but there's a reason brown
envelopes are so popular my boy.
I suggest you gather up your
things and clear out your desk.
Who's going to handle the Quinn
account then?
                       MR. BRANNIGAN.
I'll pass it over to Kenny it was
his idea in the first place.
                                         CUT TO:
Jesus Christ I must be fucking
Simon sits at the bar drinking a double whiskey and holding
the silver ornament in his hand STARING at it as if in a
trance.It begins vibrating and making those strange
noises.Startled he accidentally spills the drink of the
person sitting next to him.
                       BIG LEN.
What the Fuck????
Simon turns only to be confronted by an enormous man wearing
a dress, Lipstick and enormously garish earrings.
Take it easy Len we don't want any
Simon stares back at Big Len like a deer caught in the
headlights of an oncoming car.Len draws back his enormous
arm and hits Simon with a punch that would make Mike Tyson


Simon now nursing a prominent black eye makes his way along
the hallway towards his apartment.
Fucking fat poof.
Lucky fucking punch....
He tries putting his key in the lock of his apartment door
but the door opens in already the lock having been drilled
Simon enters the apartment to find his home has been
ransacked and all his things stolen.
His television has been broken and somebody has smeared "
Die yuppie scum" in human excrement on the walls.
Oh fuck no!
                                         CUT TO:
Simon is holding the broach while looking at himself in the
mirror.Suddenly the broach vibrates for a moment before the
overhead light blows out.The voices start again like the
sounds of a thousand souls being stretched on a rack.Simon
backs away from the mirror in utter terror and flushes the
broach down the toilet.
Simon sits facing Christine in her lavish and ostentatiously
decorated apartment obviously distraught and after pouring
his heart out to her.She responds to him with a look of


So your broke?
What did I just say?
They froze my fucking assets!
I mean this is the CAB we're
talking about!
I don't know what to say.
You'll stick by me won't you?
Simon looks Christine in the eye hoping for some sign of
To be honest.(Pause)
I really don't want to be seen
dating some criminal.
Especially a broke one.
Sorry honey.
Hope everything works out for you.
Paul looks back at his one-time fiancee with a mixture of
pain and disbelief.
Simon sits on a park bench looking downtrodden and miserable
eating a roll lost in his thoughts.He bites into the roll
before spitting out a mouthful and almost gagging.He opens
up the packaging and looks into the role and sees that it is
crawling with maggots.He throws the roll to the ground
before throwing up violently.
He kicks the roll along the path and begins walking towards
the entrance to the park.On his way he notices two HOODED
THUGS looking in his direction.He tries to ignore them as he
walks past but one of them calls to him as he walks by.
Sorry mister you haven't got a
smoke have yeh?


No sorry.
Before Simon can say anything further the two thugs approach
him and pull him towards them.Simon looks down and notices
one of them is holding a knife to his belly.
You try and run and I'll fuckin'
stick this in your throat.
I don't believe this.
Well believe it Fauntleroy!
Now hold fuckin' still.
The two thugs empty the contents of Simon's pockets.
they take his wallet,watch and mobile phone.
One of the thugs opens Simon's wallet and looks at a photo
of his girlfriend Christina.
Jesus she's alright!
Wouldn't mind givin' that a lash!!
The thugs continue to search Simons pockets.
His eyes widen when one of them takes out the broach and
stuffs it into his pocket.
      (Looking at
       Simon's Photo ID.)
Right you keep your fucking mouth
shut or I'll come around your gaff
and do you in front of yer missus.
The two thugs walk off towards the parks entrance.
Simon stands looking at the ground he lets a slight grin
knowing that one of them has the broach when he is STRUCK in
the head by it the thug having thrown it back at him.
      (From a distance.)
Yeh can have that back.
No money in Silver.
The two thugs walk away laughing like hyenas.
Simon picks up the broach and throws it into the pond.He is
caught off guard when he reaches into his pocket and the
broach reappears soaking wet.


Simon exits the gift shop smiling to himself when he is
confronted by the Pawn shop owner wielding a hurley stick
and screaming in his direction.
                       PAWNSHOP OWNER.
Give me my money back you thieving
What do you mean I gave you the
                       PAWNSHOP OWNER.
So where is it then?
I don't have it look.......
Simon empties his pockets and the broach falls out much to
his dismay.The pawnshop owner gives him a fearsome look.
                       PAWNSHOP OWNER.
I'll take that money back now.
Simon stares at the broach which appears to be glowing at
him with utter desperation.

A montage ensues where Simon tries to rid himself of the
cursed object by:

1.Putting it in an envelope and mailing it abroad.

2.Dropping it off a bridge.

3.Leaving it in a beggars cup.

4. Burying it.
After each effort Simon is distraught to discover that the
broach has made it's way back to him causing him to drop to
his knees in utter despair.Simon notices an unusually
dressed woman in her early thirties approach him and
immediately makes his way towards her as she eyes him


cautiously.Her name is MADAME LAVELLE a local fortune teller
and medium.
Excuse me miss?
                       MADAME LAVELLE
      (Looking at Simon
Simon produces the broach from his pocket and tries his best
to appear charming but comes across as the desperate soul he
so obviously is.
I was wondering if you would like
to buy this broach. As you can see
it's craftsmanship is of the most
exquisite variety.
The woman takes one look at the broach and shudders in
horror.She immediately recognises it for the evil that it
                       MADAME LAVELLE
Get that THING away from me. You
must return it from whence it
came. Otherwise you shall never
know peace.
What do you mean woman?
                       MADAME LAVELLE
Give it back to the person you
stole it from or else find a soul
as corrupted as yours to share it
It is pouring rain as Simon sits across from the Coffee shop
where he originally found the broach looking very much like
a homeless bum.It is obvious he has been there a long time
and is obviously at his wits end.Just as he is about to move
to a more sheltered spot he spots LYNDSEY leaving the shop
with a cup of coffee and quite a spring to her step.


Thank you God.
Simon gets up from the ground and begins trailing her at a
LYNDSEY KELLY sits dumbfounded as this stranger sits in
front of her babbling about the broach she left behind and
all the misfortune it has brought him.
You have to take it back.
I don't want it.
It's brought me nothing but
I don't mean to be bad but it's
your problem now.
I'm sorry.
I'm not leaving 'til you take this
I'll call the Guards.
Simon tries to give her the broach and the two end up in a
fearsome struggle with each other.Lisa falls striking her
head on the corner of the table leaving Simon looking
visibly shaken.
Simon stands in front of a nurse in reception flanked by two
Gardai on either side.He has cleaned up his appearance
considerably and is wearing a second hand ill fitting suit
no doubt donated to some charity that works with the
mentally ill.He is gradually emptying his pockets of items
including the Broach.The nurse in attendance takes a note of
each item Simon leaves on the desk.Simon notices from the
corner of his eye one of the staff a Tall DARK HAIRED PORTER
named JEFF eyeing the broach with a considerable intensity.


Mr Adam's you have been placed at
Saint Peters because the state has
deemed you a danger to yourself
and to others.
We will do our best to help you
but you must work with us and
follow the rules of our
institution until a doctor
declares you mentally fit to
return to society.
Jeff will escort you to your room
and you can get changed into a
pair of pyjamas all patients must
Jeff the orderly sits in a leather armchair running his
fingers over the piece of silver.A good days work he thinks
to himself and smiles that his usual sideline of robbing the
crazies has once again proved lucrative.His thoughts are
interrupted by one of his colleagues who approaches him with
some unsettling news.
Jeff?That new guy Simon Adams
asked to see you.
What the fuck for?
He never said but it seemed
Jeff gets out of his chair muttering to himself and exits
the room.
Simon peers out from his room through a glass partition
grinning as Jeff the orderly makes his way towards him the
broach pinned to the lapel on his jacket.He stops in front
of Simons door and looks at him with barely disguised


You wanted to see me?
I just wanted to say thank you.
For what?
Simon looks down towards the broach pinned to his lapel and
then back at Jeff looking him directly in the eye.
Looks like it's your problem now.
You really are a fucking looper.
Nobodies going to believe someone
like you.
Simon makes a motion to illustarte his lips are sealed and
winks mischiouvesly at the orderley laughing silently to
Jeff turns on his heel and walks down the corridor leaving
Simon looking out at him and grinning from ear to ear.
Free at last baby.
Free at last.
Simon switches off his light and enjoys the darkness for the
first time in a long time.


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