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Out of Eden
by Brett Slaughter (golfnotom@hotmail.com)

Rated: PG-13   Genre: Organized Crime   User Review: **1/2
Joe Spence is not the guy to mess with. He's in the business of making money, by any means necessary. The only problem is, he feels he's missing something in his life. He must question his values and his own character in this action and drama filled script.

This screenplay is copyrighted to its author. All rights reserved. This screenplay may not be used or reproduced without the express written permission of the author.


A crow flies out of the clouds toward the Burnside Bridge.
Robert Cray's "Out of Eden" starts playing.
The Portland skyline shines in the sun.
The Willamette River sparkles around the Burnside bridge.
A five story apartment building sits in the middle of a
rough industrial section of town.
The shadow of a tall man wearing a stylish straw hat,
reflects off of a white 1995 Cadillac Sedan DeVille. The
crow lands in front of him on the sidewalk.
The man's shoes are impeccably polished. His Armani suit
pressed and clean. His silk tie shines in the sun.
We then see JOE SPENCE's face, a black man with a strong
build and an appealing look. In his fifties, he still
possess a serious, yet king of cool persona.
Spence sees an older black lady on the other side of the
street waiting for a bus. He tips his hat to her. She smiles
back at him.
He takes a step forward and opens the passenger door. He
gently lays his suit coat on the seat and then closes the
He opens the driver's side door and leans against the car
while glancing at the crow.
                       SPENCE (V.O)
It was mid October when it all
went down. I wanted out of Eden,
but I never thought it would
happen the way it did.
Spence shuts the driver side door and starts the car.
                       SPENCE (V.O)
I was a real shit to whoever I
needed to be a shit too.
Spence turns onto East Burnside Street.


                       SPENCE (V.O)
For those I had no quarrel with, I
was too much of a gentleman. But
hell, we can't all be perfect.
He merges his car onto the Burnside Bridge.
                       SPENCE (V.O)
Believe it or not, Portland was
the place. It was Eden. It was
where the real shit went down. If
you wanted something done you came
to me.
Spence turns onto a busy downtown street. Two cops sit in an
unmarked police car watching Spence drive by.
Detective WYATT is a white middle aged man. By the looks of
him you can tell he's seen some rough scenes.

Detective SEARS is much more classy. He's black and well
built, but laid back.
Spence's car disappears.
                       DETECTIVE WYATT
Joe Spence! That's the real alpha
male right of this city.
                       DETECTIVE SEARS
No shit spoken there.
Spence parks his Cadillac in front of the entrance to the
                       SPENCE (V.O)
I was an ex cop from Philly trying
to make a buck or two. I wouldn't
say I lowered my standards, cause
I never had any.
"Hey Joe" by Jimi Hendricks starts playing.


About ten years younger, Spence is in a police uniform
struggling with a male criminal. Fifty feet away, his
partner talks on the radio while inside the car.
      (to criminal)
Stop moving around!
The two continue to wrestle around.
                       SPENCE (V.O)
I used to walk a beat, but it was
never in me to conform.
Spence hits the criminal repeatedly with his baton.
                       SPENCE (V.O)
They said it was police brutality,
but that was all bullshit.
The JUDGE sits at her bench while Spence and his attorney
stand before before the court. The judge is in her late
forties and looks professional.
DEFENSE ATTORNEY is in his late twenties and seems to have
no idea what he's doing.
                       DEFENSE ATTRONEY
Um, my client is a decorated
police officer and he seems to
have a, um perfect record.
                       SPENCE (V.O)
They gave me some half-ass lawyer
who just graduated from some
online school. It was all for
We have found that you acted with
unnecessary force causing the
death of a suspect.
That's bullshit!
Silence Officer Spence. It is our
recommendation that your badge be
taken and criminal charges are
placed upon you immediately. You


                       JUDGE (cont'd)
are a disgrace to the uniform.
The Judge slams her gavel. Spence is led to the exit of the
      (to Judge)
What's your problem? Didn't I do
what you said.
The Judge gives Spence a confused look.
                       SPENCE (V.O)
This was all because I wouldn't
lie for her on a previous matter.
A guard leads Spence down a hallway to his cell.
                       SPENCE (V.O)
They sent me out to Oregon where
nobody knew my previous
occupation. They said it was a
nice gesture, but I would have
preferred they didn't lock me up
in the first place.
TONY SHARLINGTON sits on the bottom bunk, in the cell.
Sharlington is in his early seventies and has slick perfect
Sharlington stands up and shakes Spence's hand very firmly.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
What the hell are you in here for?
Assault with a deadly weapon.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
With a gun?
No. With my hands.


Moment of awkward silence.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
I think your serious. I actually
think you're serious.
Damn straight.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Nice, I'm in here for stealing a
diamond ring from a prostitute.
They say they booked me for using
her services, but I gave another
excuse for my pants being down.
Just between me and you, yeah I
screwed her, but she actually paid
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Well, she offered to pay me back
since I went to jail over it. Say
maybe we can go in to business
with each other after this.
We'll see. I got a long time to
think about it.
                       SPENCE (V.O)
I was sure I would never see this
whack job again, let alone work
with him.
The Cadillac is parked in front of the Hotel.
Inside the Cadillac Spence shakes his head in laughter.
The song "Ohio" plays as Mr. Sharlington stands in front of
the hotel reading a newspaper. He is wearing a cheap suit
with an overcoat.
                       SPENCE (V.O)
Mr. Tony Sharlington. A real
hustler among other things. He was
a wanna be gangster from Ohio who
failed in the meat business. Deep
down he was a good man. A damn


                       SPENCE (cont'd)
good man. You just had to dig deep
to find it.
REMINGTON stands beside Mr. Sharlington and sips a cup of
coffee. In his early fifties, he appears tough in his
leather jacket.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
It's about time he showed up.
It ain't the first time he's late
and it sure won't be the last.
                       SPENCE (V.O)
Remington. A real wonder of the
world. Always teased for being a
geek in school, so he shanked a
kid and realized he could make
money off it. Hard to believe how
sensitive he was.
Mr. Sharlington opens the front passenger door.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
I told you I want your ass to open
my door in the morning. It makes
me look official.
My ass ain't that flexible. And
besides I'm here aren't I?
Remington gets in the back seat of the car.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Such an accomplishment and by the
way if you worked at it, your ass
would be that flexible.
Good luck with that one.
Mr. Sharlington gets in the front seat of the car. He then
shuts his door, followed by Remington.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
You know you're late?
According to who's schedule?


                       MR. SHARLINGTON
I thought we were in this
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
I give up.
You always do.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Shut up! You guys gang up on me
too much.
Sharlington skims his newspaper.
Just trying to keep you humble.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Thanks for the help.
Now where too?
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Eighty Second Ave, like we do
every Monday morning.
The Cadillac drives away.
Spence drives the Cadillac down Eighty Second Avenue. Mr.
Sharlington eyes the streets. Remington fiddles his thumbs.
"The Poor side of Town" plays from the car radio.
                       SPENCE (V.O)
Some people say that downtown is
the place to be, but right here on
eighty second, this was our real
office. It was our turf, our cash
cow. I loved the place. Even
though it was our Eden, it sure
didn't look like a garden.
They pass used car dealerships, adult shops and a constant
stream of taverns.


                       MR. SHARLINGTON
You see him Remington?
Remington suddenly pays attention.
No, not yet. But I'm hopeful.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
I would hope so.
Spence sees NEEDLES holding a sign advertising a mattress
store. Needles looks rough and is clearly a white trash
Needles hands a guy a small pack of a substance and receives
some money in return.
Looks like that guy's got a hold
on business.
Sharlington points at Needles.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Holy shit that's him. Pull up to
the guy.
Spence drives over to the sidewalk and parks adjacent to
Needles corner.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON (CONT'D)
I can't believe you spotted him.
Remington, you should be more like
I know, I'll keep trying.
It ain't that hard. I just make it
look that way.
Very funny Spence.
Sharlington and Remington get out of the Cadillac and walk
up to Needles. Spence remains in the car.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Mr. Needles.


How the hell you know my tag?
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Let's just say I'm well connected.
I'm connected too. So what do you
need? Pills? Viagra? Crack? My
guess is Viagra.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Screw you! You know who else is
real connected needles?
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Us. You see we're friends with
some officers on the force. And
with my buddy here being an ex
Sharlington points at Spence.
He knows the lingo.
Spence waves at Needles.
How much?
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Thirty percent.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Only if your product increases in
price, or your advertising sees
better results.
How do I know you're legit?
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
We got eyes on you right now.


                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Look over there.
Mr. Sharlington points to an unmarked police car and waves
at it. Detective Sears and Wyatt both wave back.
Shit, you are legit.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
We don't mess around.
Remington adjusts his jacket exposing a thirty eight special
in a shoulder holster.
I get the picture.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
So is thirty percent too high?
No, it'll work.
Needles takes out a wad of twenty one hundred dollar bills
and hands them to Mr. Sharlington.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Good man. Now remember the eyes
are always watching.
Spence, Mr. Sharlington and Remington walk over to the car.
                       SPENCE (V.O)
When Tony Sharlington said that,
he was never bluffing. We had eyes
everywhere. We had unlimited
access to street cams, ATM live
streams and even police footage.
Spence drives across the street over to the unmarked police
                       SPENCE (V.O)
Sharlington used to say that his
eyes were used on the Pyramids
that were on the dollar bill.
After spending time with him, I
started to see the resemblance.
This guy knew how to make money
and he was never ashamed of his
method, no matter what.


Mr. Sharlington rolls down his passenger window and hands
Detective Sears four one hundred dollar bills.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
We only got eight hundred out of
him today.
                       DETECTIVE SEARS
Fifty percent is still fair in my
                       DETECTIVE WYATT
You're all good men! And don't
ever let anyone ever tell you
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
You too.
The Cadillac drives down eighty second avenue.
                       SPENCE (V.O)
So this is what we do. All day
every day. We make money, we
become the middle man where there
isn't one. Some people might
wonder how I could sleep at night,
truth was I slept fine. I wish I
wasn't alone every night, but
other than that I'm all good. My
work gives me satisfaction. The
irony is enough to keep me going.
We are screwing the screwer. There
is justice in the world, and I'm
it's enforcer.
Mr. Sharlington rides in the passenger seat while Spence
drives. Remington dozes off in the back seat.
The Cadillac cruises throughout the city.
                       SPENCE (V.O)
We ran Portland. Every city block
was ours. And we even did it in a
civilized manner.


Spence, Mr. Sharlington and Remington hit a guy with
baseball bats while he is on the ground.
                       SPENCE (V.O)
Well, mostly.
Mr. Sharlington, Spence and Remington, kick and punch a guy
who's on the ground.
                       SPENCE (V.O)
We'd rough men up all the time, no
hard feelings. I was just doing my
They lift the guy up.
                       SPENCE (V.O)
We just enforced the rules. We
never killed anyone, just taught
them where the boundaries were.
Remington pulls a gun out of the guy's pocket.
      (holding gun)
What's this?
The guy just looks away.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Get up you filthy cockroach.
Spence sits in the driver's seat of the Cadillac.
                       SPENCE (V.O)
If a guy stole a gun we'd sell it
to a pawn shop.
Sharlington and Remington walk into the Pawn shop.


Remington and Sharlington lean against a counter while the
PAWN SHOP OWNER examines the gun.

The owner is extra heavy and a little suspicious.
                       PAWN SHOP OWNER
So where'd you get it?
We found it.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
We bought it.
                       PAWN SHOP OWNER
Which one is it?
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Well we found a guy who sold it
too us.
                       PAWN SHOP OWNER
Well if you'll take three hundred
for it, I don't care where the
hell you got it.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Pawn Shop Owner lays out three one hundred dollar bills.
                       SPENCE (V.O)
The guy knew we were screwing with
him, hell everyone did. But he
knew where his bread was buttered.
He'd keep his mouth shut as long
as we sent good deals his way.
Mr. Sharlington walk out of the Pawn shop and gets into the
How'd it go?
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Two hundred for me and a hundred
for you two.
Sharlington rips a one hundred dollar bill and gives one
half to Remington and the other half to Spence.


What the hell man?
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Don't worry this way you're like
blood brothers only money
brothers. Now you can't kill each
Ah, hell.
The car drives away.
Old building in a rough neighborhood. A slum apartment with
junk surrounding it.
The Cadillac pulls up beside the apartments.
This one for the mob?
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Ain't they all for the mob?
Unfortunately so.
Remington and Sharlington get out of the car and knock on
one of the apartments.
Spence waits in the car. Remington and Sharlington pull a
RENTER out of his doorway and takes him to the back of the
apartment. Renter is a trashy guy in his late twenties.
                       SPENCE (V.O)
If a renter was delinquent, we'd
make him pay.
Remington throws the renter against the wall.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
You don't got no money for us?
No man I'm out.


                       MR. SHARLINGTON
      (holding renter)
Check his freaking pockets.
Remington checks the renter's pockets. He pulls out a wad of
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
      (slapping renter)
No money, huh? Next time Spence
will collect. And you don't want
to see that.
Trust me, you don't ever want to
see that.
Remington and Sharlington walk to the car.
                       SPENCE (V.O)
When I got out of the car, it was
bad. And everyone in town knew it.
Sharlington, Spence and Remington take turns punching a drug
dealer who's tied to a chair.
                       SPENCE (V.O)
Sure we'd rob and steal, but it
was all justified. We never did
anything to anyone who didn't
deserve it.
Remington pulls a Ziplock bag full of white powder out of
the drug dealer's pocket.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
You don't sell drugs to kids in my
town. Only to adults.
Sharlington knocks the dealer over with the hand grip of his
                       SPENCE (V.O)
We were always justified, always.


MR. MARASCHINO stands in front of his brand new ATS
Cadillac. He's in his late sixties and is very short. He
wears fancy clothes that compliment his Italian decent.
TIP, JEWELS and KRAMER stand on the side of the car. DON
JOHNSON stands right next to Maraschino.
                       SPENCE (V.O)
Mr. Maraschino's crew. These were
the guys you didn't mess with.
Power, money, influence. They were
a force to be reckoned with.
Through and through.
Spence sits in his Cadillac a quarter mile away. He looks
through his binoculars at the scene.
                       SPENCE (V.O)
The only shitty part of the job.
We did most of our work for these
Kramer is a younger guy in his early thirties. He looks and
acts tougher than he is.
                       SPENCE (V.O)
Kramer, what a joke. Got his tag
name for being the so called
bodyguard for the guy from
Seinfeld. Claims he didn't like
his racist tone so he quit. But we
all know he was canned for being a
Tip just looks mean all over. He's in his fifties and has a
rough and beat up body with a bald head.
                       SPENCE (V.O)
Tip. A real ass. Chipped his tooth
on a guy's forehead in a fight.
Hence the name "Tip". Rumor is the
tip of the tooth is still stuck in
the dude's forehead.
Jewels is dressed nicer than the rest. He's tall black and
handsome with a commanding presence. He's a few years
younger than Spence.
                       SPENCE (V.O)
Jewels. He likes his bling-bling.
He's always trying to look like
me, but he don't pull it off.


                       SPENCE (cont'd)
Who's better than me to judge
Don Johnson is tall and full of Italian blood. He looks in
charge and basically is. In his late fifties, he has grayish
white hair.
                       SPENCE (V.O)
Then there's Don Johnson. He
thinks he looks like him, but I
bet old Nash Bridges would
disagree. Such a poser!
A new Lincoln and a new Chrysler 300 pull up in front of the
ATS. MARLON CRISCO gets out of the drivers side of the
Lincoln. He's in his early seventies and looks, acts and is
completely Italian.
                       MR. MARASCHINO
Marlon, how the hell are ya?
Business as usual.
                       SPENCE (V.O)
Marlon Crisco a real pain in the
ass. He's got money and even makes
more everyday.
MIKE the IKE gets out of the Chrysler. He's dressed in a
silk suit. A sixty year old white guy and a very flamboyant
                       SPENCE (V.O)
Now this guy was a rainbow rider
if there ever was one. Not an
ounce of Italian blood in him. He
used to run the union for all the
Candy factory workers, but now he
just mooches off the Italians and
brags on their spaghetti sauce. A
real man don't brag on another
man's sauce.
Mike throws a Mike and Ike candy into his mouth.
                       MR. MARASCHINO
Hey, I need one of those.
Mike tosses a candy into Maraschino's mouth.


The GAMBLING KING gets out of the passenger side of the
Lincoln. He's wearing a large fur coat. In his late
seventies, he looks like he just came from a nightmare where
he was the villain.
                       SPENCE (V.O)
This old boy was the only Italian
in the country who worked in the
trenches. You got to respect him
for that. Hell he's so old he
probably fought in the trenches of
the first World War.
                       GAMBLING KING
Maraschino. I needed to see you
                       MR. MARASCHINO
You want anything, you just name
That's what I love about you
Maraschino. Always willing.
                       MR. MARASCHINO
Gotta love a man who will do for
others what he wants done for
Not that I don't adore your
company, but why the hell are we
                       MR. MARASCHINO
Quarterly reports. We'll split the
cash and then you can leave.
Sorry cousin. I just got some
garlic bread in the oven and
noodles on the stove waiting for
What? I want some. Can I come
Marlon rolls his eyes.
                       SPENCE (V.O)
What a freaking leach.


Don Johnson shakes his head.
Okay folks. We got it all here and
All the guys walk over to the trunk of the Cadillac.
                       MR. MARASCHINO
You ever seen a million in a trunk
                       GAMBLING KING
Not without a body bleeding all
over it.
Mike the Ike has a freaked out look on his face.
Johnson pushes a button on his remote key. The trunk pops
open revealing a huge pile of cash.
All the guys stare in amazement.
                       SPENCE (V.O.)
This is where it all was. Their
power, their greed and their
motivation. Without that money,
you might as well throw them all
in there to suffocate. They lived
and breathed for the cash. Some
even said they bled green.
The guys begin loading armfuls of cash into their cars.
                       SPENCE (V.O)
We only complimented these guys,
we had too. But I hated it. Deep
down they knew what I thought of
them. My boss on the other hand,
Mr. Sharlington. He would have
given anything to be part of their
crew for just a few seconds.
                       MR. MARASCHINO
We will see you all next quarter.
                       SPENCE (V.O)
Basically, Tony Sharlington was
their bitch.
They all disperse.


                       SPENCE (V.O)
Shitheads really had a good thing
The sunsets on the river and the city skyline.
Robert Cray's "I'm Afraid" plays as Spence drives the
Cadillac throughout the city. Sharlington and Remington
sleep in the back.
                       SPENCE (V.O)
We knew everyone and everyone knew
us. Dealers, Pimps, gangs and even
the lowest of the low; attorneys.
Spence drives passed the Rose Quarter.
                       SPENCE (V.O)
We blackmailed, sent messages and
even did some contract work.
However mostly we just drove
around listening to Robert Cray,
acting like we owned the city,
because basically, we did.
Spence merges onto the Steel Bridge.
                       SPENCE (V.O)
If there was pain to be felt, we
inflicted it. If there was a
message to be sent, we delivered
it. Most importantly if there was
money to be made, we made it.
Spence continues driving downtown.
                       SPENCE (V.O)
Seems like we had it made. We did
in some regards. But I could never
describe how empty the whole
within me felt. And I was sure I'd
never fill it. Ever.
A small cafe with less than twenty tables. The cafe is
outdated and not in the greatest neighborhood.


Mr. Maraschino walks around the restaurant shaking hands and
greeting the people that are eating. He approaches a table
Neil is a city councilman in his late fifties and looks
official dressed in a nice suit.
                       MR. MARASCHINO
Councilman Neil. How's your
                       COUNCILMAN NEIL
Fantastic as always.
                       MR. MARASCHINO
Only the best for the prominent
leaders of Portland.
                       COUNCILMAN NEIL
About that. We got a problem. Can
I talk to you in the kitchen?
                       MR. MARASCHINO
Absolutely Councilman.
Maraschino waves at Don Johnson to follow him into the
kitchen. Don Johnson walks behind the councilman.
Maraschino leads the Councilman into the kitchen in the back
of the restaurant.
The Kitchen is outdated and dirty. With black and white tile
on the floor the room is small and dinky.
                       MR. MARASCHINO
What possibly could I do for you?
                       COUNCILMAN NEIL
I'm afraid our arrangement is
permanently over.
                       MR. MARASCHINO
What the hell do you mean?
                       COUNCILMAN NEIL
My boys and I got a better offer.
If we let these other guys operate
free of cops and regulation,
they'll give us fifty percent.
Last time I checked you pay out
ten percent. Hardly a fair


                       MR. MARASCHINO
Your new partners are full of
shit. Fifty percent of nothing
ain't much of anything.
                       COUNCILMAN NEIL
With us in bed with them, that
means you're out of the game which
leads to no competition. Which
leads to market control.
                       MR. MARASCHINO
Councilman, you're one of us. Your
father was Italian. He played
chess with my father, and you're
saying your gonna shit on us for a
chance at forty percent.
                       COUNCILMAN NEIL
It's fifty. And I want to be fair.
You renew our contract at fifty
percent and we gotta deal.
                       MR. MARASCHINO
In the words of John Wayne from
the movie True Grit. "That baby
sister is no deal."
                       COUNCILMAN NEIL
Business is changing Maraschino.
You can conform or step out of the
                       MR. MARASCHINO
I was never good at conforming.
                       COUNCILMAN NEIL
Someday you'll meet somebody who's
worse at than you. And then you'll
have to conform, or something
Councilman Neil walks out of the kitchen.
Maraschino looks at Don Johnson.
                       DON JOHNSON
Arrogant son of a bitch.
Maraschino paces in anger.


                       MR. MARASCHINO
You just saw a walking dead man.
One of our own is trying to screw
us. Arrogant son of a bitch.
                       DON JOHNSON
I knew his mother. She really was
                       MR. MARASCHINO
A what?
                       DON JOHNSON
A bitch.
                       MR. MARASCHINO
Oh. Yeah, that's where he gets it.
Very small sub shop in a rough neighborhood of Portland.
Spence, Remington and Sharlington munch on their Philly
cheese steak sandwiches.
HERMANO walks in the building. A heavier, domineering man in
his seventies. He's part Russian and part Cuban.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Hermano! It's been too damn long.
Sharlington Stands up.
I knew you'd be here.
                       SPENCE (V.O)
Son of a Cuban mother and Russian
father. Birthright in the Russian
mafia. The guy was born to be
crooked. I always liked him more
than the Italians. He always did
his own thing.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Yeah, old Spence here is from
Philly and he says this place's
cheese steaks are better than any
you can get in Philly.
Could we have a word alone?


                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Yeah, sure.
Sharlington walks a few feet away from the table.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON (CONT'D)
We ain't talked a while. Business
doing good?
This is personal. I got a
granddaughter, she's been on the
wrong side of the street. You know
what I mean. Drugs, all that shit.
Anyway, she got raped one night
and now she ain't the same.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Shit man.
She can't even sleep at night.
She's taking pills and shaking.
She is so disturbed. Me and her
mother question if she'll ever
come back to normal.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
What can I do to help?
I want you to find the guy and
kill him. I don't mean beat him up
and make him wish you killed him.
I mean literally kill him and let
him bleed in the freaking street.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
I don't know man. We usually just
send messages.
I'm serious. I'll give you ten
grand. You'll be in the right.
This guy destroyed my baby girl.
Cut him up and you'd be doing me a
favor. I don't know of anyone else
I could ask.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
I want to help you, but kill him?
Are you sure?


I've never been more sure in my
life about anything.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Could we just beat him up a
I'll give you fifteen grand.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
It's not the money, you know that.
Please. She's my only
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Okay, I'll do it. I'll find a way.
Thank you! I won't ever forget
HERMANO leaves the restaurant.
                       SPENCE (V.O)
Sharlington never could say no.
A fancy two story home in a desirable neighborhood of Lake
Mr Maraschino and Don Johnson stand on the front porch.
Maraschino rings the door bell.
Mike the Ike walks to the door with a feminine swagger.
I'll get it Marlon.
Mike opens the front door.
                       MIKE (CONT'D)
Oh what a surprise! Good to see
you. Please come in.


                       DON JOHNSON
You freaking live here now?
No just on holiday.
                       DON JOHNSON
Today ain't no freaking holiday.
It's National Unity day in Italy.
                       DON JOHNSON
What the hell is that?
The celebration of the day we
kicked the shit out of Austria.
                       DON JOHNSON
What's this we shit!
                       DON JOHNSON (CONT'D)
      (quietly to Mike)
I'd pay a million dollars to see
you kick the shit out of Arnold
What ever is that supposed to
                       MR. MARASCHINO
Where the hell's Marlon?
Preparing dinner. We're gonna have
Wayne Newton's favorite dish and
Dean Martin's favorite desert.
                       DON JOHNSON
Won't that be a joy.
Marlon walks out into the entryway holding a dinner rag.
Boys what can I do for you today?
                       MR. MARASCHINO
Well, Marlon could I speak to you
in private?


Marlon throws the rag at Mike.
Absolutely. Mike entertain Don
Juan over in the kitchen for a
Marlon and Maraschino walk into the study.
                       DON JOHNSON
It's Johnson, Don Johnson.
I was gonna say that you didn't
look very Mexican, but I'm not
sure if that would have been P -
                       DON JOHNSON
Let me show you what the hell I
learned in the prisons of Russia.
I'm always game for a learning
                       DON JOHNSON
Oh you will definitely be
Marlon sits on the desk while Maraschino stands a few feet
So what the hell made you come all
the way out here to Lake Oswego?
                       MR. MARASCHINO
We got a problem. Our people are
backing out.
You mean the city officials?
                       MR. MARASCHINO
I mean our cops, our Judges, our
politicians and even our business
Why the hell are they dropping us?


                       MR. MARASCHINO
Councilman Neil is behind it all.
He got a higher contract. Fifty
Isn't he one of us?
                       MR. MARASCHINO
He's Italian, but he sold out long
Do you have any ideas?
                       MR. MARASCHINO
Yeah, I could cut his nuts off and
then his head.
No we can't do that.
                       MR. MARASCHINO
Why the hell not? We did it in the
old days.
It ain't the old days anymore.
Besides he's Italian. Now do you
have any realistic ideas?
                       MR. MARASCHINO
We can't raise their cut, but we
could black mail them.
How you gonna do that?
                       MR. MARASCHINO
I got a prostitute I use, she has
a book with names and numbers.
We're gonna need more evidence
than that.
                       MR. MARASCHINO
We can set stuff up, you know
videotape what happens. Then we
got raw footage, proof.


Do it. We got a damn good thing
going here and I can't afford to
loose it.
Maraschino nods his head in agreement.
                       MR. MARASCHINO
Neither can I.
Spence, Sharlington and Remington stand over a guy that's
beat nearly to death. Blood drips down the guy's face. He's
spread out on the floor and can barely move.
Spence I can't do this.
Just don't think about it.
                       SPENCE (V.O)
The guy deserved it, but I
couldn't do it either.
Sharlington grabs a box-cutter knife.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Okay hold him down Spence.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Come on.
No. No way.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Look I don't want to do this
anymore than you do, but I said I
would, so help me.
I don't kill.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
This is a bad guy. Real bad. He
deserves it dammit.


You ain't the judge of that.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Of all times, you choose now to be
a self righteous prick.
I have lines that I don't cross.
You know that. You've always known
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
I said yes to a member of the
Russian mafia. You walk away from
this guy and we all die. You want
Don't put this on me.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
You don't even know what's right
or wrong anymore, so don't pretend
you do.
I know when something is just
plain wrong. This is wrong, no
matter how you play it or justify
it, it's wrong.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
That maybe so, but it doesn't
change what I have to do.
Nope, just what I'm gonna do.
Spence walks away from Sharlington toward the exit.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Where are you going?
I quit.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
What about the Cadillac?
Spence flips Sharlington the bird with his back facing


Shove it up your ass.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
The Cadillac or the damn finger?
Spence keeps walking.
Sharlington looks at Remington.
Hell if I know.
Spence walks out of the abandoned building while Sharlington
and Remington follow about fifty feet behind.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Spence I need you and you know it.
Spence keeps walking.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
I'm not gonna cut his nuts off.
I'm all talk and you know it.
It's over.
Come on man. I can't do your job.
I'm not tough. I wear cardigans
when I'm alone.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Spence don't Wiesel out again.
Spence turns around.
Aren't you sick of this moral
dilemma? Don't you ever wanna go
to bed at night thinking you did
something good that day? Do you
wonder, maybe in the grave we'll
be thinking about all the bad
things we did?
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
All the time.


I wanna smell fresh air and not
feel guilty. I wanna look a guy in
the face and no that I don't have
to threaten him. I wanna erase
every damn thing I've done that I
didn't approve of.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
You can.
They made me into this. I didn't
belong in prison. You might of,
but not me. I'm a good guy. The
system failed me. They ain't gonna
get me anymore. I ain't gonna let
it happen.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Spence, come on. This guy deserves
it and you know that.
I'm not gonna cast the first
stone. Who am I to judge this man?
When I'm free of innocence myself.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Don't throw that bible crap at me.
At least I have something to
believe in.
Sharlington stands in silence
                       SPENCE (CONT'D)
It's over. I owe myself too damn
Spence walks around the corner and disappears.
Who knew this job would be so
freaking emotional.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
He'll be back.
He only does this what, every six


                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Yeah, every time we're about to
kill a guy.
The beat up man is bleeding badly and barely alive.
Remington and Sharlington lift the man into the trunk.
We didn't kill him.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
No we didn't.
Now what?
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
We're gonna leave him somewhere.
Maraschino's ATS speeds into the warehouse and stops.
What the hell is this?
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
I don't know. Don't say shit kid.
Maraschino gets out of his car and runs up to Sharlington.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
What's the matter Mr. Maraschino?
                       MR. MARASCHINO
You stupid son of a bitch. You
beat the shit out of our boy and
you have the audacity to ask me
what's the matter?
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
This is your boy?
                       MR. MARASCHINO
Damn right it is. Who the hell are
you doing this for?
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
This boy of your's raped the
granddaughter of my other client.


                       MR. MARASCHINO
Who's your other client?
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
He's to remain nameless.
                       MR. MARASCHINO
Sharlington I could blow your head
off, bury your ass and nobody
would ask me a question about it.
Who the hell ordered this?
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
You can torture me. I ain't
                       MR. MARASCHINO
Fine. I can find out on my own.
Now put him in my car.
Sharlington and Remington carefully carry the man to
Maraschino's car and gently set him in it.
                       MR. MARASCHINO
You're lucky you're Italian, or I
would blow your head off right
Maraschino gets in his car and drives away.
You just stood up to the biggest
mob guy this side of the
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Yeah, and now there's gonna be
hell to pay.
Mrs. Clause/Rose's Place is a three story 1920's bungalow,
in a rougher neighborhood near downtown. The home is very
dark and looks abandoned. It has a side driveway with a door
on the side with a step up to the house.
A late model BMW drives up to the front of the house and
parks. Councilman Neil gets out of his car and walks up to
the front door and knocks.


MRS.CLAUSE/ROSE opens the front door.
Mrs. Clause/ Rose is a beautiful madam. Her working name is
Mrs. Clause, but her real name is Rose. She has long dirty
blond hair and always dresses classy. She's upscale with a
great body and a comfortable persona. In her forties, she
looks like she's in her prime.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
Councilman Neil, I've been waiting
for you.
The Councilman enters the house.
                       COUNCILMAN NEIL
I'm sorry Mrs. Clause. I was in a
meeting with the Mayor.
Neil kisses Mrs. Clause on the lips.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
Did he mention me?
The Councilman removes his jacket and hangs it on a coat
                       COUNCILMAN NEIL
He gave me the evil eye when I
said I was going to the North
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
More like the South Pole.
The two lightly laugh
Mrs. Clause takes the Councilman's hand and pulls it over
her shoulder. She then leads him to the bedroom.
The entire interior has been updated and not a detail
missed. Pink shag carpets with purple walls darken the
rooms. Silver disco balls hang from the ceilings.
There's an entrance room followed by a hallway. The next
room over is the bedroom. A giant bed sits in the middle
with a zebra blanket covering satin sheets.


An older Lincoln parks on the side of the house. Tip sits in
the driver seat, with Kramer in the passenger seat and NEDDY
in the back.
Neddy is a skinny man in his late twenties. He's weak and
So here's the plan. Me and Kramer
will go in. You stay seated. Watch
out for any cops or surprises.
Honk if we need to get out of
You got it.
Tip and Kramer walk up to the side door and sneak in.
Neddy gets out of the car.
      (to himself)
Screw this. It's blackjack hour.
Neddy quickly walks down the dark street and disappears.
We hear some laughter coming from the bedroom as the side
door to the house shuts.
Tip and Kramer tip toe into the hallway. Kramer reveals a
video camera and creeps over to the bedroom. Kramer begins
filming the bedroom while he and Tip stand in the hallway.
Mrs. Clause's and the Councilman's head is the only thing we
see due to the blanket covering their nudity.
The two kiss. As they kiss again, Councilman Neil sees
Kramer out of the corner of his eye.
                       COUNCILMAN NEIL
You son of a bitch! What are you
gonna do, blackmail my ass?
You're a quick thinker.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
You shits.


The Councilman stands up revealing silk boxers. He grabs his
belt and chases Kramer.
Well I think we got enough.
      (also running)
Yep, we sure did.
Tip drops his car keys as he opens the side door of the
house, but he does not notice.
                       COUNCILMAN NEIL
Give me that damn video tape!
Tip and Kramer storm out of the house and reach the car. Tip
frantically looks for his keys as Kramer tries to open the
passenger door.
What the hell is going on Tip?
Councilman Neil jumps out the side door to the side driveway
where Kramer and Tip's car is parked.
                       COUNCILMAN NEIL
Give me the tape shitheads.
We can't.
                       COUNCILMAN NEIL
Than I'm gonna cut you up.
Councilman Neil twirls his belt like he's trying to whip
Why the hell aren't we leaving?
Kramer dodges a whip.
I can't find the car keys. I think
I have to go back in.
Tell Neddy to unlock the door.


I can't the son of a bitch ran
Are you shitting me, You got to be
shitting me.
The two continue to dodge whips from the Councilman's belt.
Nope! I'm not shitting you.
                       COUNCILMAN NEIL
Ain't that the shits.
Councilman Neil slashes the belt and hits the hood of the
car accidentally missing Kramer.
Hey neighbors, citizens of
Portland. Councilman Neil Golds is
standing outside in his silk
Councilman Neil slashes Tip's lip with the belt.
Shit man! You just did that.
Tips lip leaks blood down his chin.
                       COUNCILMAN NEIL
I sure did.
Kramer looks around and sees a sledge hammer leaning up
against the house. He sets the camera down and picks up the
That was convenient placing of a
sledgehammer for us.
He runs toward the Councilman and hits him in the mouth with
it knocking a few teeth out.
The boss said to blackmail him,
not kill him.


He's not dead he just needs to go
see a dentist.
Well I'm not paying for it.
He's got dental insurance. He's a
Let's go get the damn keys.
Why'd you lock the door anyways?
We're in a shitty neighborhood,
everybody knows that.
Tip and Kramer walk back into the house.
Mrs. Clause wears a robe and holds a baseball bat.
The two enter the hallway. Kramer holds the video camera.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
Give me the damn camera.
Look lady we ain't gonna hurt you.
We just want our keys.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
Hurt me, You're the one that's
gonna get hurt. Now give me the
damn video camera.
Why do you even care if we
blackmail the councilman?
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
It's bad for business and I could
go to jail. Look at me. I'm too
pretty to go to jail.
Yes you are!
Tip picks up his keys off the floor.


Got em, now let's go.
Bye lady.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
You're not leaving with my camera.
Mrs. Clause swings the bat at Kramer but misses, hitting the
wall. Kramer runs after her and grabs her. He struggles with
her as they wrestle.
Sharlington walks through the front door and into the
entryway. He hides behind the wall partially viewing the
      (to Kramer)
Quit your love making and let's
get the hell out of here.
Sharlington picks up a lamp and breaks the glass bulb over
the back of Tips head. Tip falls to the ground.
Sharlington takes the base of the lamp and breaks it over
Kramer's head causing him to hit the ground as well.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
Perfect timing Tony. How's your
day been?
Mrs. Clause puts on one of her high heels and kicks Kramer
in the nuts with it. Kramer moans in pain as his face
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Swell, just swell. I needed to
relieve some stress.
Sharlington than kicks Tips body over until he rolls to the
edge of the side door of the house. Mrs. Clause walks up to
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
Let me finish the prick off.
Mrs. Clause kicks Tip in the tooth with her high heel,
causing the tooth to fall off and him to go out door and
down the step to the pavement.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
Now you know not to screw with us.


Kramer crawls across the hallway floor and picks up Tip's
car keys.
Sharlington grabs Kramer and throws him out the door.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
And you too!
Kramer lands next to Tip. Sharlington slams the side door.
Tip and Kramer crawl to their car.
Tip digs in his pocket for his car keys.
Shit man, after all that we got to
go back in there.
I left the gall damn keys in there
Kramer throws them at Tip.
No worries man, let's go.
Tip unlocks the car. The two struggle to get inside the car,
but they eventually do.
Where the hell's the video camera?
Now that I don't have.
We should go back and get it.
Really? Of all times, really?
Ah, you're right. Screw it.
The car drives away.


The Councilman knocks on the side door. Sharlington opens
it. The Councilman has a bloody lip and his chin is black
and blue.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Look what the hell happened to
                       COUNCILMAN NEIL
Is it that noticeable?
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Just a little.
                       COUNCILMAN NEIL
What should I tell the people?
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Say you got robbed.
                       COUNCILMAN NEIL
I can't prove that.
Mrs. Clause tosses the Councilman's clothes too him.
Sharlington grabs his pants and searches the pockets.
                       COUNCILMAN NEIL
      (to Rose)
What happened to the recording?
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
I destroyed it.
                       COUNCILMAN NEIL
Sharlington pulls out the Councilman's wallet.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Here I'll take this and now
they'll believe you.
                       COUNCILMAN NEIL
Well, see you next week Mrs.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
Regular time?
                       COUNCILMAN NEIL


The Councilman walks out the door.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
Now Sharlington, I owe you for
saving my life.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Are you saying what I hope you're
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
This one's on the house.
Mrs. Clause takes Sharlington by the hand and leads him to
the bedroom.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
Same as always?
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
You know me, I'm an old fashioned
kind of guy.
An abandon parking lot with two cars face each other.
Kramer and Tip, still bleeding stand in front of Don
                       DON JOHNSON
You stupid ass Sons of Bitches.
I know, I know. We screwed up.
                       DON JOHNSON
Screwed up. You videotaped the sex
act, got in a fight with a City
Councilman, probably killed him
and you left the camera with the
Man her boyfriend did a number on
                       DON JOHNSON
The man you described sounded like


Yeah that was him. He's mean.
                       DON JOHNSON
Sharlington couldn't do shit. He's
ancient. That's why Spence works
for him. Are you sure his black
bitch didn't kick your ass? Cause
he could tare you up.
You afraid of him?
                       DON JOHNSON
Shit no. I never said that. I
mean, I could kick his ass any day
of the week.
                       DON JOHNSON
      (shaking his head)
As for you idiots. You want
something done anymore you got to
do it yourself.
Johnson gets in his car and speeds away.
Johnson quickly pulls up to the house and walks around to
the side entrance. He pulls out his gun and opens the side
He slowly creeps down the hallway. He looks in the bedroom
at what appears to be a body shaped lump in the bed. He
fires his pistol three times at the bed. He hits some cotton
and realizes that the lump is a pillow.
He then hears foot steps run down the hall.
Mrs. Clause wears a fancy dress with a feather boa.
Sharlington has a belt around his neck and a large amount of
makeup on his face. He's tied up with a rope that Mrs Clause
holds. He's in a white tank top and some silk boxers.
Johnson turns around and runs into the hallway. He sees
Sharlington and fires his pistol hitting the door frame.
Mrs. Clause and Sharlington run through the entryway out the
front door. Johnson follows the two out the door.


Mrs. Clause reaches the car and unlocks it.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Why did you lock the car door?
Johnson fires his pistol hitting the car's tail light.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
We're in a shitty neighborhood.
Everybody knows that.
Mrs. Clause pushes Sharlington into the back seat of the
car. She then jumps in the driver seat.
Johnson runs around the car to the drivers side. He attempts
to open the door but she quickly locks it. She starts the
car. He fires a shot into the car, hitting the radio. He
pushes his hand through the broken glass and points the gun
at Mrs. Clauses head.
                       DON JOHNSON
Tell me where the damn video
camera is or I'll blow your head
Sharlington uses the seat belt to strangle Johnson.
Mrs. Clause hits the gas to the car. Sharlington uses the
seat belt to hold Johnson partly in the car. His feet drag
as they drive.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
      (to Johnson)
All you are is unneeded weight.
Sharlington finally let's him go, causing Johnson to drop
and roll as he hits the pavement.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Well we got rid of him.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
Yeah, but now I'm gonna need
someone to protect me.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
I think I have someone perfect for
the job.


Spence relaxes in his recliner and drinks a beer. The
classic TV show "Chips" appears on the TV.
A knock is heard at the door. Spence stands up and reaches
for a pistol. With his gun hidden behind him, he opens the
Mrs Clause and Sharlington stand in the doorway still
dressed the same. Sharlington appears to be in much
discomfort and embarrassment.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Hey Spence. How are you doing
      (to Sharlington)
What the hell happened to you?
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
A lot.
      (to Mrs Clause)
And I assume you must be the four
o'clock masseuse he brags about
every Tuesday.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
And you must be Mr. Tough Guy.
Something like that. My name's
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
Everyone calls me Mrs. Clause.
Well, we came by because I'm not
gonna let Sharlington go until you
do a little job for me.
I don't work for Tony anymore.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Could you please just help me
tonight damn't.
You look like you could use it.
Come on in.


Spence leads the two into his apartment and sets down his
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
      (noticing TV)
So you like Chips.
I think I resemble Poncherello.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
I could see it.
Sharlington attempts to undo the ropes that bind him.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Would one of you help me out here?
You look like you're doing just
fine to me.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
Before I let him go I need an
answer. Will you do the job for
What is it?
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
I need you to kill a guy for me.
No, no I don't kill. I enforce. I
deliver messages and I make people
wish they're dead sometimes, but I
don't do the job.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Spence, just make an exception for
I don't work for you anymore.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
It's simple. These guys are trying
to kill me for some unknown reason
and I want you to stop him.


                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
Tonight. I can't do that tonight.
Hell I can't do anything tonight.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
What the hell would it take?
Hazard pay. Twenty five more an
hour than usual and a five hundred
deposit from both of you.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
What's your usual rate?
A hundred an hour plus expenses.
But no killing, just a little
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
      (referring to
We'll comp you. He's got you
covered, cash and all.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
What the hell? That's a good weeks
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
      (to Sharlington)
Do you think you're gonna find
another out?
Plus you give me an apology.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Screw that and screw you.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
      (to Rose)
And screw you too.


Okay I guess you're both out of
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
That means your boss will probably
die with me tonight.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
      (to Spence)
Okay. I'm sorry, you're right and
I'm whatever the hell you want me
to be. Now would someone get me
out of this damn contraption?
      (to Mrs Clause)
I'll get dressed while you assist
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
Don't take too long.
Spence drives his Cadillac down a busy downtown street.
Mrs Clause sits in the passenger street.
Where too lady?
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
Just drive. The guys that are
after me favor a joint a few miles
up here.
So what's your real name?
Mrs. Clause pushes a button to roll down the window and
lights a cigarette.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
I don't have one anymore.
I know what you mean.


                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
My identity is judged on my
Who were you before?
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
Maybe a person.
Come on. You had to be somebody.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
I used to be Rose Campbell.
Well believe it or not I used to
be a cop.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
No shit?
Yeah, for real. So what caused
your straying from a normal life?
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
I guess life it's self did it to
Rose sees a small donut shop on the corner.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
This is it.
Spence pulls up to the corner and parks his car.
How do you know they're here?
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
They're here. This is their spot.
I know some guys who favor this
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
Well, I know a guy in here that
can tell us why they were trying
to kill me.


Who was it? Did Sharlington know
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
He didn't say.
It better not be who I think it
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
Do you just want to walk in there
like you own the place?
That might be our only option.
Spence and Rose get out of the car.
The donut shop sits on the corner of a busy street. Behind
the shop is a large, old brick building with a side entrance
behind the donut shop.
Three guys loiter in front of the donut shop as Spence walks
passed them. One is FAT, the other is FATTER and the third
is the FATTEST.
      (whispering to
I'll have to knock these guys out
before we go in.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
Just do your thing and I'll watch.
You boys frequent this place?
                       FAT GUY
Nice to see Grandma let you take
her car out tonight.
I think I saw you boys once
before. Yeah, that's right. You
were dipping your donuts in some
grease to make it a little more
your flavor.


                       FATTER GUY
      (eying Rose)
What do we have here?
                       FATTEST GUY
I had a dream about you last
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
If I had a dream about you it
would be a nightmare.
The three guys pout in anger and embarrassment.
Need I say more boys?
                       FAT GUY
What do you say we cut his balls
off and then we can take turns
with her?
The other two guys agree in excitement.
Or I beat the shit out of you.
But, because I'm a man of
negotiation. You could all just
get the hell out of here.
                       FATTEST GUY
Shove it Prick!
Can't say you didn't have your
Spence breaks Fattest guy's nose with the palm of his hand.
He then punches Fat and Fatter in the jaw in one motion. He
then hits them both on the other side of their jaw with the
back of his fist.
The three guys stumble up and run away quickly in fear. Rose
stands in shock.
You ready to make our way in?
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
Looks like you've warmed up.
Spence and Rose wander over to the side of the building.


A large SAMOAN man stands at the side door.
Excuse me, but it appears your in
our way.
What's the password.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
Look, we really need in there.
He's not lured by the female
species, instead he favors what he
can eat.
Samoan pushes Spence away.
Give me a password or make me
exercise my duties.
Well as you can tell, me and the
lady don't have a password. But by
the looks of things you don't
exercise anyways.
The Samoan pushes Spence again. In response Spence grabs the
Samoan's shoulders and drives his head through the dead bolt
locked door.
About thirty people surround a small room with a bar and
various card tables. Neddy is sitting at a card table. The
Gambling King is standing in the center of the room with an
overcoat and an old gangster hat.
Spence and Rose rush into the building.
Nobody move, I'm a man on a
mission and I will accomplish it.
The man behind the bar hides a shotgun pointed at Spence. At
the opposite side of the room another man sneaks a pistol
out of his coat.


Spence pulls out his two pistols and points them at both
                       GAMBLING KING
How the hell did you see them do
Now my guns may not be as big as
yours, but they sure are prettier.
So why don't you put your's down
before this trigger happy son of a
bitch gets antsy.
                       GAMBLING KING
Okay! Put them down. Do what he
Nobody moves.
                       GAMBLING KING
Come on guys. The man's got balls
and he looks like he's not afraid
to use them. Just put the guns
The two put down their guns.
                       GAMBLING KING
So what the hell can we do for one
of Mr. Sharlington's men?
King. I'm after a man. You see him
Mrs. Clause?
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
Yep. Right there.
Mrs. Clause points at Neddy.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
You know him?
I know everyone in this joint.
Get up Neddy, you're going with


      (to King)
Bullshit. I'm not going anywhere
with these freaks.
                       GAMBLING KING
No way man I put a five thousand
dollar deposit down tonight. I'm
not going anywhere.
You're about to be deposited into
hell if you don't do what I say.
Come on King.
                       GAMBLING KING
You brought a bad boy to my joint.
You might have destroyed a
partnership too. If he don't whack
you tonight, which he will, I'll
do it.
      (to Neddy)
Looks like you're checking out.
Let's go.
Spence backs out slowly toward the door. From behind, the
Samoan wraps his arms around Spence's chest to suffocate
him. Spence drops his guns and twist the Samoan's arms. He
quickly grabs the Samoan's neck with his hand.
I could break your neck in twenty
seven places in about a half a
second, but I'm a nice guy so I
Spence let's go of his neck.
The Samoan moves toward Spence's gun which is on the floor.
                       GAMBLING KING
Samoa, don't do it. Just let him
Spence picks up his guns.


Now don't give us any shit boys or
we'll be back.
Neddy, Spence and Rose hurry down the alley.
You know that black son of a
                       GAMBLING KING
Yeah. He used to work for us.
Not anymore?
                       GAMBLING KING
Not after tonight.
Don Johnson and Marlon Crisco surround Mr. Maraschino who is
sitting down in a chair in the middle of the room.
                       DON JOHNSON
That damn Sharlington broke my
King just called me up. Apparently
Sharlington's black bitch picked
up Neddy. And he was with the
                       MR. MARASCHINO
And freaking Sharlington almost
killed Johnson earlier.
                       DON JOHNSON
I can plug them all. Spence,
Sharlington and the prostitute.
No, no. Take out the chick if you
think she'll talk. Take out Neddy,
he'll talk for sure.
                       MR. MARASCHINO
Sharlington doesn't know any


                       DON JOHNSON
And the girl Maraschino?
                       MR. MARASCHINO
Yeah. I can always find another.
                       DON JOHNSON
You got it.
Don Johnson walks out of the kitchen.
Word on the street is that one of
our boys raped a girl. She's
somehow connected to the Russian
mob. You know about this?
                       MR. MARASCHINO
I ain't gonna lie. He raped a
girl, but we sent him away for it.
He ain't dead or nothing.
Was the girl Russian? Did you have
anything to do with it?
                       MR. MARASCHINO
No, no. He just screwed up one
night at a club. Some unimportant
girl. He just got a little out of
hand that's all.
Good. Cause we don't need anymore
enemies. That's the last damn
thing we need right now.
An abandon parking lot near the Port of Portland.
Spence and Rose stand next to the trunk of the Cadillac.
Spence pushes the remote button causing the trunk to open.
Neddy is crouched down inside of the trunk.
Okay, who's out to kill her?
Ask her.
Spence looks at Rose.


                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
I don't know what the hell he's
talking about.
      (to Neddy)
Are there any more coming for her?
Don't ask me man. Maybe one more.
You know these Italians, they only
send guys in pairs.
So are you saying the mob is out
to kill her?
You said it not me.
Well what do you know?
I know she shouldn't have pissed
him off.
Who off?
      (points to Rose)
Ask her, she knows.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
I don't know what he's talking
Spence looks at Rose and then Neddy.
Would somebody please tell me who
the hell has a mark on us?
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
Look I'm not exactly in the type
of business where I have no
Can I get out of the trunk now?


Might as well.
Neddy stands up and gets out of the trunk.
Two hundred yards away Don Johnson positions a sniper rifle
to take aim at Neddy.
Neddy leans on the Cadillac.
Spence paces around.
      (to Rose)
Now you're telling me you have no
idea why the mob would want you
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
No, my mind is blank.
      (still pacing)
They don't pick their targets
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
I'm telling you I have no idea
what's going on.
Spence stands next to Neddy and leans on the Cadillac as
Well I don't know what the hell to
tell you.
Johnson centers his sniper rifle and hovers his finger over
the trigger.
                       DON JOHNSON
      (to himself)
You never could do a job right,
you little Weasel.
Johnson pulls the trigger on his sniper rifle, hitting Neddy
square in the head.
Neddy hits the ground fast.
Shit! Get down Rose.


Spence throws Rose behind the Cadillac. The two fall to the
Johnson fires another shot and hits a window of the Cadillac
Keep your head down.
Spence pulls out his pistol and shoots in Johnson's general
direction while remaining behind the car.
Johnson fire again hitting a tail light. Spence fires back
at him a few times hitting nowhere close to Johnson. Johnson
stands up and leaves the scene.
Son of a bitch shot my car up.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
He killed Neddy and could have
killed us.
Yeah, and he shot my car up
The cafe is outdated and is set up like an old fashioned
diner. Spence and Rose sit at a booth facing each other
while the eat their breakfast.
You told me that Neddy was the one
who tried to kill you.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
He works with the guys who tried
to kill me.
So why do they want you dead so
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
It's a long story.
If I'm gonna go up against my
business partners, I wanna know


                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
Do you know Mr. Maraschino?
Yeah, you mean spelled like the
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
Exactly like the cherry.
Is he involved in this?
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
He sent his guys to record me and
a prominent person in bed
together. He was gonna use it to
blackmail the man who was with me.
And what happened?
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
I stole the video and destroyed
it. Then this guy named Don
Johnson came over, not the actor.
And he tried to get it back.
I know him. What'd you do to him?
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
Me and Sharlington may have broken
his shoulder. We kind of dragged
him with the car.
Ah shit, You broke Don Johnson's
shoulder? Not the actor, but the
number one man for Mr. Maraschino,
the last true mobster.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
Oh, boy. We're screwed. We're very
screwed. We're beyond screwed.
                       SPENCE (V.O)
I never really wanted to be in the
center of shit, but now I was
buried in it.


                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
Well what are we gonna do?
I'm gonna pray, like crazy.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
You're religious?
"Blessed are the dead who die in
the Lord, they will rest from
their labor".
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
What's that from?
Revelation Chapter 14. I hope
you're tired, because after what
you got us into. Looks like we're
gonna be resting from our labors,
Spence drives the Cadillac while holding the phone up to his
ear. Rose sits in the passenger seat.
Sharlington sits outside a coffee shop when he answers his
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Spence, Where the hell are you?
We're in the car. Someone took a
shot at us and killed her attacker
in the process.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Were the two incidents related?
Considering the shooter had time
to aim, I would say so.


                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Did you get the dead guy's wallet?
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Shit, you never could think under
pressure. He could have had
hundreds on him.
We need a safe place to hang.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Come out to my place.
All the way out in Gresham?
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Yeah, no one will think to look
We'll come out there. I've always
wanted to meet your wife.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Well I guess you will. By the way
Spence, I probably should of told
you Don Johnson was on the other
end of this.
Yeah, that would have been
They both hang up.
A split level home in a middle class subdivision in Gresham
Oregon. Spence and Rose on the front porch. Spence rings the
doorbell. Sharlington opens the door.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Come on in.
Spence and Rose follow Sharlington up the stairs.


Sharlington walks into the kitchen.
The song "Hanky Panky" blasts from a radio as BETSY dances
while cleaning some dishes in the kitchen. Betsy is in her
mid eighties and full of white hair. She is wearing a
sweatshirt, sweatpants and rubber gloves.
Sharlington moves behind her and twists his hips while
moving his arms. Betsy turns around and begins dancing with
After a few moments Betsy looks up and notices Spence and
Rose. Betsy hurries over to the CD player and stops the
I'm sorry I didn't know we had
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
They're not company. They're just
going to stay the night.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
Really we don't mean to put you
Just one night.
No worries. I'll start cooking.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
You don't need to do that.
I insist. Besides, we never have
Betsy looks inside the fridge.
                       BETSY (Cont'd)
We don't even have milk Tony. You
got to go to the store.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Yes Ma'am.


Spence, Rose, Mr. Sharlington and Betsy all sit at the
dining room table. They have just finished their breakfast.
And so that's how I got my fourth
husband. Tony was my fifth.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
So if you have all that money from
the insurances and pension, why
does Tony work?
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
      (whispering to
To get away from her.
I heard that.
Everyone laughs
      (to Sharlington)
You better watch yourself. She's
got such good ears we should take
her out in the field with us.
Sharlington waves his hand across his neck in attempt to
silence Spence.
He's twenty years younger than me
so I know he married me for my
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Now that's not true.
Okay he's only ten years younger
than me.
Spence and Rose laugh.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Not that part the money part.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
So why'd you really marry him?


For the sex. Believe it or not.
Rose and Spence giggle as Sharlington reveals his
What a bad investment. The yields
probably don't even increase
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Very funny.
Hell the closing bell, probably
rings two minutes after the
No kidding. When the sex does
happen it's quicker than cracking
an egg.
Oh, boy.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Stop it.
Even the blue pills we bought him
don't work. And hell we can't
figure out the pump. We squeeze
and squeeze, nothing happens.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Everyone laughs.
Go away mental image.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
No kidding. That'll take some
years to wipe away.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
      (standing up)
Okay now that the laughing has
occurred at my expense, I'll take
the dishes while one of you


                       MR. SHARLINGTON (cont'd)
changes the subject.
Oh I think we were just getting
Spence, Betsy and Rose laugh.
Oh honey, your so damn cute when
you're embarrassed.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
I'm glad you're having fun.
Betsy stands up and walks into the kitchen and hugs
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
I still love you.
Spence and Rose relax on a couch.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
Thank you so much for helping me.
I don't know what I'd do without
No problem. I feel like it's my
duty or something.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
What do you mean?
I don't know I just never really
protected a woman before and it
kinda feels rewarding. It's hard
to explain.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
Well I just hope that they don't
attempt to kill us again.
Well we're half way there if this
was a professional hit.


                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
How do you know that?
Well they try twice and give up.
It's an Italian myth about bad
luck. The third try something bad
will happen.
A man sneaks up the outside stairs to the back deck.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
So after this we probably won't
see much of each other.
Spence looks into Rose's eyes.
Yeah, probably not.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
I don't want that.
Betsy leans out the bathroom window aiming her shotgun at
the man.
Neither do I.
Spence leans in for a kiss. Betsy fires the gun, killing the
man and interrupting the kiss.
The man falls off the deck and onto the ground.
Spence grabs Rose and ducks behind the coffee table.
Spence pulls out his gun as Sharlington runs into the room.
Betsy walks out into the living room.
      (holding shotgun)
Well I got him.
Betsy Caulks the shotgun.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
Yes you sure did.
Great cook and can shoot too.
She's a keeper.


                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Yeah, she's the whole package. Now
the cops should be here any
minute. Anything I can do for you
No I'm okay. You guys get out of
here. Were gonna have to fill out
paperwork and interviews. Tony
will give you some money for a
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
I will?
Yes, you will.
                       BETSY (CONT'D)
I hate intruders. Everytime I
shoot em, the cops act like I did
something wrong.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
You've done this before?
Oh yeah, twice since I've been
married to Tony. This is the
Thank you for the food. Your
My pleasure. Now you kids have
some fun tonight. You deserve it.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
I'll take care of things here.
We'll take the day off tomorrow.
You forgot I quit.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
I'll see you the day after


Yeah. By the way, thanks
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
For what?
You didn't have to harbor us, but
you did.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Your welcome.
The two shake hands.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON (CONT'D)
Now get going. Get that woman to
Sharlington pats Spence on the back.
Police cars and ambulances line the street in front of the
house. Detective Sears and Wyatt stand in front of the
garage. Sears talks to the Medical Examiner while Wyatt
talks to a deputy.
                       DETECTIVE WYATT
Yeah, there's nothing here. A
clean shot. Justifiable homicide.
Let's clean it up and go home.
Sears and Wyatt walk into the house.
                       DETECTIVE SEARS
Sharlington it looks clean, but is
You guys know each other?
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
No, he just knows my last name I
guess. Boys lets walk out here for
a minute.
Sharlington, Sears and Wyatt walk out to the deck. The body
is still lying at the bottom of the stairs.


                       DETECTIVE WYATT
What the hell happened?
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
My wife got him. Clean shot too.
                       DETECTIVE SEARS
Was he mob?
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Damn right. Twenty kills to his
                       DETECTIVE WYATT
We're still gonna need some under
the rug money.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Fine two thou a piece, but that's
                       DETECTIVE SEARS
We won't push our luck and neither
should you.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
What do you mean?
                       DETECTIVE SEARS
These guys aren't good guys.
                       DETECTIVE WYATT
What he means is watch your ass.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
      (looks at body)
Probably not a bad idea.
                       DETECTIVE WYATT
      (to Sears)
Now let's go, I wanna sleep a
while before the bank opens.
The Detectives walk back in the house, down the stairs and
out the front door.
We need to talk. Why the hell was
a mob man here to execute a hit on
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
How do you know he was mob?


Twenty two caliber. Who shoots
people with that round. Now you
better tell me what the hell is
going on here.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Honey, I'm not a used car salesman
The cafe is near empty due to it being around midnight.
Spence and Rose sit at a booth sipping coffee.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
I wanna thank you for protecting
me. It means a lot.
Well, I think you're gonna be
okay. These idiots give up easy.
They can't focus on one thing for
very long.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
I know so little about you. Tell
me about your past.
You don't want to hear it.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
I do. I actually care, believe it
or not.
Same story as everyone else. I
ended up here, not really by
choice or plan. Just sorta fell
into it I guess.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
What was your childhood like?
You wanna be my shrink? Is that
what this is?


                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
No. They say eighty percent of
what you are is because of your
They say fifty percent of all
statistics are made up fifty
percent of the time.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
Stop stonewalling.
Okay. Well my father was a
minister and my mother was a
school secretary.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
Wow. And you became a hit man.
No, I'm not a hit man. I'm an
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
So do you still talk to your
No. I ran away from home when I
was fifteen. It's funny, I hated
them at the time. But here we are
thirty years later and I can
repeat everyone of my Dad's
sermons word for word.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
So they did influence you.
I guess so. What about you? Is
your mother as pretty as you are?
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
Let's not talk about my past.
Now you're stonewalling.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
I can get away with it, because
I'm a woman.


Yes you are. And you can get away
with it, a lot smoother than I
Maraschino sits next to Don Johnson, when Tip and Marlon
walk in.
      (referring to
He wants to talk to you.
                       MR. MARASCHINO
Well Crisco, what's cooking?
You know what's cooking. Call it
off. This hooker will be the death
of us. You're causing too much
havoc by not killing her.
                       DON JOHNSON
Our boys tried, we chose the
Marlon interrupts Don Johnson.
Shut up. We can't afford to battle
this Spence guy. As long as he's
protecting the girl, we need to
back off. We got bigger fish to
                       MR. MARASCHINO
Like who?
Whoever's stealing our contracts.
If you have to, end the
                       MR. MARASCHINO
It's about time.
A bad Italian that's dead, can do
a hell of a lot less damage than a
bad Italian that's alive.


                       MR. MARASCHINO
Di accordo. I agree.
A dumpy motel in a rough area. Spence is parked in front of
the motel. Rose walks up to the car and gets in.
"Wichita Lineman" by Glen Campbell is on the radio.
Did you get us a room?
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
Yeah. Maybe I'll just stay here.
Not alone.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
Are you listening to Glen
Yeah, he's great. Same last name,
are you related?
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
Maybe distantly.
You sound surprised I'm listening
to him.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
It's just not you. A little dated
don't you think?
I'm dated and they don't make it
this good anymore.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
Just like you.
Spence turns up the radio and starts the song over.
Listen to this.
As the song starts Spence conducts the music with his hands.


Listen to that rhythm and beat. It
sounds angelic.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
It's country.
It's poetry, perfect poetry.
                       GLEN CAMPBELL (V.O)
And I need you more than want you.
And I want you for all time.
Listen to that. I need you more
than I want you, but I want you
for all time. The lyrics are just
Spence looks over at Rose. He notices she has a discouraged
look on her face.
What's on your mind?
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
Have you ever felt that way about
Well, I've wanted women and needed
them too, but I don't know. Maybe
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
To be wanted is one thing, but to
be needed is better. You can't
have one without the other.
It kinda needs to go both ways.
Well to be honest, I feel that way
about you.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
You don't need me. You're
protecting me. I need you.
I want you.


                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
No. You don't know me. You don't
know what you want and you
certainly don't need me. To be
honest I don't even need you.
What are you afraid of? Making
love to somebody you have feelings
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
I think we're done here. Maybe
done in general.
Rose gets out of the car.
Spence gets out of the car.
Rose, come on.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
Don't call me that. Don't act like
you know me, you don't.
Fine, but I do want you. The
problem is I need you.
Rose walks to her motel room and goes inside.
Spence gets back in his car.
The parking garage is near empty with just Councilman Neil's
BMW parked in a spot.
Kramer and Tip hide behind a concrete barrier. Tip holds a
pump shotgun.
Councilman Neil walks into the garage. He stretches and
prances toward the car.
                       COUNCILMAN NEIL
      (to himself)
Time to go see Mrs Clause's and
get laid.


The councilman unlocks his car and gets in the drivers seat.
He shuts the door.
Tip and Kramer run up to the car. Tip pumps his shotgun and
fires into the driver side window. The pellets hit the
councilman in the shoulder.
You should never play two ends
against the middle. Never works
Councilman Neil's body shakes with blood all over it.
                       COUNCILMAN NEIL
You son of a bitch.
Tip fires again, hitting the councilman in the chest.
Grab his wallet, we're supposed to
make it look like a robbery.
There's blood everywhere.
No shit.
I don't want to touch his guts.
We got hand sanitizer in the car.
Now grab the damn wallet so we can
leave the scene of the robbery.
Kramer carefully grabs the wallet with a disgusted look on
his face.
Spence sits parked in his car in front of the motel. The
radio plays the song "Beast of Burden" when he notices Rose
walking toward the car.
He watches her intently as she wanders over to the Cadillac.
She is wears a fir coat that covers the length of her body.
She opens the passenger door.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
Been here all night?


Got nothing else to do.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
That's stubborn.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
Can I get in?
The door was unlocked.
Rose gets in the car.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
Start the car and drive.
You like to give orders.
Spence starts the car and puts it in gear.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
Just drive.
Where to?
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
An abandon alley.
You got it.
Spence drives to an abandon alley and parks the car. The car
is parked out of view of the main street.
So what's the problem?
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
The problem is I need you too.
Rose kisses Spence. They proceed to make out. Rose takes her
coat off, revealing a blue bra and matching panties. She
returns to her seat and reclines it backwards to the bottom
so that she is lying down.
Spence removes his suit coat and unzips his pants. Rose
pulls Spence's tie down so that he is directly on top of
her. They kiss as Spence grips her thighs.


The doorbell rings. Marlon walks to the front door and
answers it.
Don Johnson and Maraschino stand on the doorstep.
                       DON JOHNSON
I see your man's not here.
No Mike's not here. What the hell
do you mean by saying "your man"?
                       MR. MARASCHINO
He doesn't mean anything. Can we
Marlon walks into the kitchen, followed by Maraschino and
Don Johnson.
                       MR. MARASCHINO
You watch the news today?
Yeah. Portland's short a
Councilman. An Italian councilman.
                       DON JOHNSON
We pulled a card out of his
wallet. You know what it said?
I didn't kill him, so no.
                       DON JOHNSON
It had the conversion of rubles to
It was Hermano. He was the one
getting into bed with the
                       DON JOHNSON
What's so special about Hermano?
                       MR. MARASCHINO
He's either crazy or he has a huge


                       DON JOHNSON
He's going up against us.
Hermano sits at a table with Sharlington and Remington.
Hermano's two bodyguards sit at the bar.
The damn mob ordered my baby girl
to get raped. The freaking
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
What do you mean why? They did it.
And now I got them back.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
They had to have had a reason.
I was taking over their contract.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
The Italians wouldn't just order a
teenage girl to get raped. That's
not how they do it.
That Maraschino guy, he's the shit
behind it.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
That midget ain't gonna do
something like this. It's just not
part of his M.O.
He was gonna blackmail the
councilman, but it didn't work so
he killed him. Councilman Neil was
the only link between me and
taking over the cities action.


                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Why the hell did you think you
could take over the Italians job?
Honestly, greed I guess. Some
Russians back home promised to
fund me if I took control over
this market.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Greed is gonna be the death of us.
We all want what we don't have and
we're never satisfied with what
what we got.
That's not all of it. After I
found out it was them that ordered
the hit on my baby, I also found
out about their last shipment. I
hijacked the car and now I got
their two million. Sons of bitches
probably looking all over for it.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Well make sense now why they're so
pissed. Things aren't looking
My granddaughter was raped, the
Councilman is dead and I'll
probably be killed with the week.
Maraschino's Cadillac pulls up to the front of the
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Maybe sooner.
Tip, Don Johnson, Kramer and Jewel's all get out of the car
guns drawn.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON (CONT'D)
Get down!
They fire into the restaurant windows taking out the two
Sharlington and Hermano get on the ground.


If you survive this, their ten
million is in a trash can on third
and Burnside.
Hermano crawls out the back door.
Tip, Johnson, Jewels and Kramer walk into the restaurant.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
A lot of good it's gonna do me
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Don't kill me guys. I'm a
                       DON JOHNSON
      (to Kramer)
Bullshit. Pop him.
Kramer fires his pistol hitting, Sharlington in the ribs.
Kramer does not notice, but the bullet does not kill
The four walk out the back in pursuit of Hermano.
Don Johnson shoots Hermano in the leg with his shot gun.
Hermano squeals in pain.
                       DON JOHNSON
Where's the freaking money?
You son of a bitch!
                       DON JOHNSON
Where's the money shit head?
I burned it.
You destroyed my little girl. I'd
do it all over again just to spite
                       DON JOHNSON
Where's the damn money?


Burn in hell. That's where you all
                       DON JOHNSON
You maybe right.
                       DON JOHNSON
Tip, he ain't no good to us alive.
You messed with the wrong damn
Tip pumps his shotgun and fires, hitting Hermano in the
chest. Hermano's dead body sprawls out in the parking lot.
Hermano's car sits on the side of the street.
                       DON JOHNSON
Let's check the car.
They open the car door and search the car. Kramer pulls out
a note from the center console.
Insert note which reads:
Money is in a trash can on third
and Burnside.
This is too easy.
They can't be that stupid.
                       DON JOHNSON
They're Russians.
Stupid sons of a bitches just left
the car unlocked.
You should never leave your car
unlocked in this neighborhood.
Sound of sirens in the background.
                       DON JOHNSON
What do you say we get the hell
out of here and get the money?


Sounds perfect to me.
Sharlington crawls to the window and watches the four guys
Remington stands in front of the cafe with his cell phone up
to his ear.
Spence drives down a busy street as Rose sits in the
passenger seat.
Spence's phone rings with the "Law and Order" ring tone.
Spence answers up his phone.
This is Spence.
Spence we got a problem. I need
you to get over to the cafe and
What is it?
Sharlington's going nuts. He was
shot and Hermano's dead.
Is Sharlington gonna make it?
Yeah, the bullet just cut some fat
off him. But he's talking crazy.
He wants to plug all of
Maraschino's people. Get over here
We'll be there in five minutes.
The two hang up their phones.


                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
What happened?
You know that saying "get out of
the kitchen if you can't stand the
heat. Well, I think the kitchen
just got a hell of a lot hotter.
                       SPENCE (V.O)
I never really liked the heat.
Spence and Rose walk into the cafe. Remington and
Sharlington are sitting at a booth. Spence and Rose sit
across from the two.
What's going on Sharlington. How
bad are you hit?
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
I'm fine. But it's over. We're
gonna end these sons of bitches.
You know we can't do that.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
What the hell happened to your
sermon about justice?
It's not our job to enforce
punishment upon others. That's why
we're mortals.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
These piles of shit murdered
Hermano in front of my face. They
raped his granddaughter and tried
to kill Rose. They're evil and we
have to end them. End them now.
It's not that simple. We can't
just kill and feel justified.


                       MR. SHARLINGTON
This is beyond feelings Spence.
This is good versus evil and they
are evil. It's our job to pursue
I won't kill them. I can't bring
myself to do it.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Fine, than we'll hurt them.
We can't do it without them
If they retaliate it's self
defense. Than we can justify
killing them.
Not me. I'm not going down that
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
You're already on that road. Your
best friend is begging you to
teach these guys a lesson and you
still refuse. Never mind the fact
you know Sharlington is right.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Spence, we owe it to Hermano's
family to do something.
Spence, let's do it.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
Exodus, eye for an eye, tooth for
tooth, foot for foot and hand for
The New Testament; "but whosoever
shall smite thee on thy right
cheek, turn to him the other
also." That's the higher law.


                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
I think it's time we live the old
law. The lower law.
You know your bible.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
I've read it a few times. I find I
can relate since Jesus spent time
with people of my profession and
the tax collectors.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
Let's go even out the score.
Just no killing.
                       MR. SHARLINGTON
I promise.
Sharlington and Rose stand in an alley watching a laptop
that shows footage from a street camera on the screen.
Spence walks down the street stalking Kramer who rides a
bicycle very slowly. Spence has a Blue tooth headset in his
ear. Kramer grabs a duffel bag from a garbage can.
Woo hoo, take the money and run.
                       REMINGTON (V.O)
Okay Spence we're watching. Keep
following him.
Got it.
Tip and Jewels sit in a parked car four blocks down from
Kramer. Jewels is in the drivers seat.
Spence and Kramer walk a few more blocks.
Kramer reaches a corner that is kitty corner to where Jewels
and Tip are parked.
You got it?


      (from across
Kramer waits for traffic to clear up when he sees Spence
eying him.
Holy shit!
Kramer pedals his bike quickly down the street away from the
car and the corner.
We got to go get our boy.
Remington, grabs the computer as Sharlington and Rose pile
into the car. Rose gets in the drivers seat. Remington gets
in the car and they drive off.
Dammit, let's go. Let's go dammit.
Spence follows Kramer for about a block and then notices a
building parallel to the street. Spence sees a skateboard
next to the building. He grabs it and runs into the
building. Kramer does not notice and keeps pedaling quickly.
Traffic clears up enough for Jewels to turn the car around
and follow Kramer.
Spence uses the skateboard and speeds through the building.
He sees through a window that he has passed Kramer. Spence
than jumps out a window of the building and lands on the
pavement. He gets up and leans against the edge of the
Kramer reaches the edge of the building. Using the
skateboard, Spence clotheslines Kramer off the bike. Spence
then grabs Kramer's hair.
You tell your bosses, if they
wanna go to war, I'll win.
Spence slams Kramer's head against the concrete.


Spence then grabs the duffel bag as the Cadillac arrives.
Spence gets in the Cadillac and they drive away.
Jewels and Tip arrive at the building and get out of the
car. Kramer lies on the ground holding his head.
Dammit Kramer!
I'm alive.
You lost the freaking money!
It was Sharlington's black guy.
Yeah we know who it was.
Spence drives down Sharlington's street. A Chrysler 300
drives away from Sharlington's house and passes Spence
That looked like King's car.
                       MRS. CLAUSE/ROSE
Why would he be here?
He's connected to Maraschino and
Sharlington took the money home
with him.