	Login Help

Screenwriter Community

by Tom O'Malley (Tomalley2k@hotmail.com)

Rated: PG-13

Genre: Comedy User Review:

A short story about two friends. This is the first draft of it. Very basic.

FADE IN:

INT. LIVING ROOM - NIGHT

The room is brightly lit. Steadicam shots show a
contemporary, middle-class living room. The space has a
couch, love seat, recliner, television and generic artwork
placed evenly around the wall space. The television is on
and muted and the father is seen doing dishes in the kitchen
through the livingroom entranceway. There are two boys, Ben
and Luke, standing in the middle of the room. The shots
range from medium to tight as to not reveal too much about
the room or the other people in it. Ben is wearing a button
up white shirt and loosened tie with suspenders, dark pants
and dress shoes. His appearance is disheveled. Luke is
dressed casually in street clothes and appears a bit more
together physically.

BEN
(Angry, yelling)
That is some bullshit. People
can't go around doing as they
please, however they please and
get away with it. Not on my watch.
I'll be damned if I let another
one slip through my fingers. And
you, you seem to think this is all
a big game. I'm doing this for my
health, Eh? Well we all know
that's not true. Christ, Lavis.
Fuck you for leaving me back there
and fuck you for trying to weasel
your way out of this since day
one. This is no longer about her.
This is about you and me, a
partnership. Fuck.

BEN backs away, takes a deep breath, runs his hand through
his greasy hair and turns back to Luke. Luke remains
submissive, ashamed, and quiet.

BEN
(Calming down)
I need you on this one, Lavis.
This is bigger than the both of
us. Are you with me or not?

LUKE
(Unconvincing)
Mmhmm.

There is an awkward pause between the two characters and a
silence falls over the room for a few seconds. The silence
is then interrupted by the excited clapping and shot of
Ben's mom and little sisters sitting on the couch across the
room, straight up, attentively looking on the two boys. The
two boys look at each other proud, give each other five and
take an overdramtic bow to their fans.

FADE OUT:

Opening credits appear over black, MUSIC (TBD) also begins
to play and carries until the fade in following the credits.

INT. DINER - NIGHT

Ben and Luke are seen in a laid back diner at a small table
for two. Luke has a small pile of pennies in front of him.
He is playing a game with himself, trying to flick and spin
the coins into a goal he has arranged. Ben is sipping his
coffee and nervously tapping his legs and hands.

BEN
Was it rude of me to order hash
browns with my meal?

            LUKE
      (Distracted by
       coins)
Huh?

BEN
Since you're paying. I don't think
you've ever had to pay for me
before, I feel horrible. Should I
have gotten a more basic meal?

LUKE
I got hash browns too.

BEN
Yeah but you're paying!

            LUKE
      (Attentive,
       calming)
Dude, I think of it as paying for
your company.

Ben seems satisfied and intrigued by that answer and leans
back in his chair.

BEN
(Under breath)
I'm gonna be paying for people's
company soon.

LUKE
(Chuckling)
Stop. You're gonna find a girl.
Especially with that new haircut
of yours, are you kidding me?

The boys' chat is interrupted by the waitress bringing two
plates on her arm of food, syrup in her fingers, coffee in
the other hand. She sets the plates down and turns to Luke
with the coffee pot.

WAITRESS
More coffee, hun?

LUKE
Yeah please. Hey, what do you
think of my friend Ben over here?
Eh? He's a good lookin guy am I
right?

Ben is shocked at his friend's actions and is very
uncomfortable with the situation. He gives Luke a snide
stare and then slowly turns to smile at the waitress with a
very unconvincing, awkward grin. A shot of the waitress's
face shows her disinterest in Ben as she turns and walks
away.

Luke watches the waitress walk away and laughs into his
coffee cup that he is holding with one pinky extended. Cut
to Ben's face turning to Luke and noticing how dantily he is
drinking his coffee.

BEN
(Chuckling)
Do you think you're straight when
you drink your coffee like that?

Luke becomes aware of his stance and retracts his pinky and
struggles to regain a more masculine grip on the mug.

BEN
I'm gonna blow this audition
tomorrow. I know it. I'm gonna
choke.

LUKE
Ben, you had a standing ovation in
your living room tonite. Stop
(MORE)

LUKE (cont'd)
worrying. You've been studying
acting since you could talk. Think
of it this way, you're so
disatisfied with yourself. Well,
this is your chance to be someone
else.

BEN
Come with me.

LUKE
Yeah sure. Why not. If it'll shut
you up.

Luke takes a bite of toast.

BEN
No no no, I mean, come with me and
audition.

LUKE
Boy, what the fu-

BEN
The part of Mr.Lavis. You know all
the lines already. You've been
practicing with me for weeks.

LUKE
Dude, I can't act! This is insane.

BEN
Hell yeah it's insane. It's not
like you'll get the part, just be
there for support. It'll be fun.
Are you in? Please!

LUKE
What have you ever done for me?

BEN
I kept you company at the diner
tonight.

Luke is seen shaking his head in a contemplative state and
then looks up at Ben.

INT. AUDITION HALL - DAY

Cut to an establishing tilting shot of the exterior of the
audition building. Above the door is a large white banner
with red lettering "Open Audition Today! Regional Theater."
People are walking in the door.

Ben and Luke are standing in line against a plain white wall
with posters of "Dirty Money" plastered sporatically.

BEN
Ya know I really think I should've
had a bit of scruff goin on in
this headshot. I think that'd make
me a lot more marketable. Do you
have a pen?

LUKE
(Chuckling)
Chill out, it's fine. If anything,
I'd be worrying about those
untamed eyebrows.

BEN
Did you even bring a headshot?

LUKE
Of course.

Luke pulls out from his jacket a Polaroid photo of his face
smiling into the lens while holding the camera. Ben fights
to contain his laughter and turns around to face the
direction of the rest of the line.

INT. REHEARSAL ROOM - DAY

First person tripod shot of excerpts from five people trying
out for the lead role. Each is completely different and
mediocre in its own way. "Next" being screamed from the back
of the room ends each shot abruptly.

INT. REHEARSAL HALL - DAY

In the same hallway, only moved up a bit towards the front
of the line, Ben is seen thumbing through the script one
last time, mouthing the lines to himself. "Christ Lavis,
fuck you for leaving me back there." Luke is quietly
observing his surroundings in subtle amusement.

LUKE
Yo, what kind of a person does it
take to work the registration
table at a small town audition
like this?

Ben lends his ear to listen to Luke's question and then
gives a glance without moving his head from its reading
position. A shot of a middle aged, reasonably attractive
woman stamping and signing in people at the front of the
line. Followed by a shot of Ben looking giving Luke a
confused look of inquizitive curiosity.

LUKE
Think about it. I'll bet at one
point she wanted to be somebody,
ya know? Now she's stuck here in
the middle of nowhere watching the
talent of the future walk by her
one by one. Her bedroom is
probably plastered with photos of
Marylin Monroe and Judy Garland,
her childhood idols that she could
never be. She has let go of her
dreams. I'll bet you anything she
works in a diner somewhere. Her
hopes of being anything have flown
right out the window. If Bill
Murray himself walked through her
diner door one night she would
just look at him and say "Wipe
your feet."

Ben gives Luke a crazed look of complete confusion as to
where he even came up with such a theory and then returns to
his script.

BEN
(Reading)
Shouldn't you be brushing up on
your lines maybe? Ya know, for
that audition your about to have.

LUKE
Dude, you told me to come with you
and try out. You never once said I
had to put effort into this.
Besides, I'm gonna let it flow.
I'm not going to play Mr.Lavis. I
am Mr.Lavis. That's the key to
acting.

BEN
(Sarcastic)
Oh, wow. I didn't realize you knew
the key to acting. Wow. What did I
waste four years in acting school
for? Wow, thanks man. I wish you
would've told me sooner.

As the two boys are talking they are moving further and
further up the line.

BEN
Okay I'm next. Give me some words
of encouragement, hurry.

Ben fixes his collar and straightens his coat sleeves,
looking to Luke for a pep talk.

LUKE
That's easy. Just remember, no
matter how hard this seems or how
much pressure you have, you're
going to die.

Ben shakes his head in confident agreement until Luke
finishes his sentence.

BEN
What!? That's not exactly what I
had in mind.

LUKE
(Humored)
No no, think about it, we're all
going to die. Nothing matters.
Nothing we do in life matters one
bit. I'm not trying to be
negative, just realistic. I mean,
you can spend your entire life
trying to reach the top and trying
to obtain your goals and meet all
of the social standards of a
decent life, cars, kids, family,
wives, whatever. But in the end,
you're just going to die. Dead.

Ben turns around, wide-eyed to the registration table.

BEN
(Stuttering)
Benjamin Davis.

The woman at the table stamps his forms and takes his
headshot from him.

LADY
Go ahead in the first door.

Ben walks halfway around the table and looks back at Luke,
still in shock of what he said moments ago, and continues on
walking. Luke moves up in the line.

LUKE
Hey, you look familiar. Do I know
you from somewhere?

LADY
Hmmm... well I'm a waitress at the
Greenville Diner. Ever been there?

Luke smirks to himself and hands her his forms and Polaroid.
Another short montage of the events in the audition room
segways to a shot of Luke walking out of the room and Ben
waiting for him.

BEN
(Over zealous)
Dude, I just rocked that shit! You
want to talk about fierce? I was
fierce. Let's go home, I dont
wanna miss the phone call.

Ben pats Luke on the back and pushes him along down the hall
way. Luke makes a few attempts to talk but is overtaken by
his friend's excitement and rare confidence. A two-shot of
the boys walking away from the camera down the hall shows
Ben becoming very suddenly distracted by something behind
them as they walk. The two boys stop, Ben's eyes stuck very
itnently on this new subject. Luke is confused and looking
to Ben. Ben takes Luke's face, smooshes his cheeks together
and turns his head in the direction of the camera. The
following shot shows a very beautiful blonde-haired girl at
the front of the registration line giving the woman her
papers. She notices the boys and quickly turns her head
away.

INT. CAR RIDE - DAY

Luke is driving, Ben in the passenger seat. The camera is on
the hood of the car, glass glare and reflections are
present. Microphone clearly inside vehicle.

BEN
(Excited)
Did you see that fucking Goddess?
I swear to you, never before in my
life have I laid eyes upon such a
creature of perfection.

Luke gives Ben a strange and surprised look in reaction to
the wording he chose.

BEN
She had this ora to her, ya know?
She was so fucking beautiful I
could puke. And I do mean
beautiful. There's "hot" girls
which are really just good for sex
and then there's "decent" girls
that you can bring home to mom and
all, but pretty much only wife
material and the sexual attraction
is mild. This girl was the best of
both fucking worlds. Beautiful.
And I have never thought this
about anyone I assure you.

Luke is clearly distracted and not all that interested in
this conversation.

LUKE
Yea, yea man. I mean she was nice.

BEN
Nice!? Christ, you're talking
about the love of my life!

LUKE
Listen, I'm happy for you. Its
just that-

BEN
What!

LUKE
Well-

BEN
What!

LUKE
Hi!

Ben relaxes and sits more comfortably, waiting for Luke's
statement.

10.

LUKE
It's just that I know you. You
would never have the balls to
actually talk to this girl.
Granted, you do seem excited about
it and I am happy for you as I
said, but it's difficult for me to
see anything coming of it in
reality. And that is a shame. I
mean people, ya know, they're just
people. You get so nervous around
girls but I never understood it
really. Think about it, those
pretty faces are just skulls. Ya
know? Skulls are gross. Plus, they
poop.

BEN
Okay, alright. I see where you're
coming from but dammit don't you
see the potential of this
situation? If she gets the female
lead, which who would be crazy
enough not to give to her, then
she will be working alongside me
for six hours a day for the next
month and a half! She can get to
know me and we can rehearse that
intense ass kiss scene after
hours. Ya know, I didn't even mean
that. I don't even care if I kiss
her, I just want to hold her. I am
in love, dude. You know this is my
shot at not settling for once in
life.

LUKE
(Hopeful)
Well then the best of luck to you
sir.

BEN
Hey, how'd your audition go by the
way?

Ben slugs Luke in the shoulder and laughs histarically.

INT. LIVING ROOM - DAY

Starts with screen completely black. Phone rings, the left
half of the screen fades in, showing Ben's apartment. A

11.

different phone rings, right half of screen fades in to show
Luke's apartment. Camera remains static throughout the
whole scene.
Ben and Luke pick up their phones simultaneously.

BEN
Hello? Yeah, this is him.

LUKE
Yeah? Oh, um, yeah this is Luke.

BEN
Oh, well thanks alot, I mean I've
been rehearsing for this...

Ben is cut off by the person on the phone.

LUKE
Really? Well, I didn't think I did
THAT well.

BEN
(disappointed)
Oh...what exactly does that
entail?

LUKE
(surprised)
are you kidding me? (almost
laughing) You'll have to pardon my
response here, it's just that, I
kind of only auditioned because
of...

Ben cuts himself off as he realizes what this could mean to
Ben, and more importantly, their friendship.

BEN
No, I mean...thanks for the
opportunity. Yeah, right. I'll
see you Tuesday.

Ben hangs up the phone.

LUKE
God, yeah, well thanks alot, man.
Right, I'll see you on Tuesday.

Luke hangs up the phone.

Ben picks up his phone and dials a number. We hear Lukes
phone ring, he picks it up.

12.

LUKE
Um, hello?

BEN
Hey man, how's it goin?

LUKE
It's, uh, going alright.
(hesitantly) Did you, uh, hear
anything about the audition?

BEN
(annoyed)
Yeah, I'm a fucking understudy to
the lead role. I came so close to
being so close to this girl, and
now nothing. So goddamn close.

LUKE
(reassuringly)
Yeah, man but just think, You'll
be able to spend time with her at
rehearsals.

            BEN
      (realizing what
       Luke just said)
Yea, man you're right! I'll still
get to see her beautiful face
every night, get to know her,
maybe a cup of coffee here and
there. This may not be as bad as
I thought, man.

LUKE
See man, there you go.

BEN
Alright, well I gotta go. Still
gotta get all these lines down.

            LUKE
      (seems like he may
       tell Ben he got
       the main role)
Um, ok ma, well good luck with
that. I'll see you around.

BEN
What's wrong man, you're acting
even more flakey that your usual
self.

13.

LUKE
(nervously)
Um...nothing man, I just, uh,
realized that, I have
to...uh...go. Bye.

Luke slams his phone down nervously.

LUKE
(to himself)
Shit!

Luke's half of the screen fades to black.

BEN
(to himself)
Whatever.

INT. REHEARSAL ROOM - DAY

The rehearsal room is a large empty cafeteria space. Chairs
are stacked up around the room with folded tables bordering
the walls. The play's cast (minus Luke) and understudies are
standing in a circle around the director and assistant
director. The assistant director has a clipboard. A shot of
Ben in the crowd shows him swooning over Karen from across
the room.

DIRECTOR
(Yelling)
Okay, welcome to the first
rehearsal of Dirty Money. We're
going to spend the first few
nights doing basic run throughs
and we expect everyone to be
off-book by next saturday at the
very latest, okay? Now there's
been some minor changes to how we
usually do this do to the size of
this cast. Understudies will be
working with the assistant
director, Mike. You will all meet
at the same time as us, only in
room B21 downstairs. Alright? Any
questions? No. Okay.

Ben's trance is interrupted by the news. He is now attentive
to the announcement.

ASST. DIR
If I can have the understudy cast
follow me, we'll make way here.

14.

The understudies are attentive and a bit disappointed but
willingly follow the asst. director through the exit.
Through the line of people leaving, Ben can be seen staring
at Karen, thoroughly saddened by this announcement. He
sighs, and walks with his crowd unwillingly.

DIRECTOR
(Laughing)
See ya!

The cast is unsure of how to react to the director's abserd
behavior.

DIRECTOR
Let's everybody get comfy here and
we'll get started.

Luke runs through the door with his jacket on, out of
breath.

LUKE
Sorry, I'm late. I just had this-

DIRECTOR
(Proud)
Ah shhhh! Ladies and gentlemen, I
present to you the new star of
regional theater...

The director double checks his clipboard.

DIRECTOR
Luke Schligelski!

The cast is impressed and gives a very welcoming round of
applause to Luke. He seems very unsure and uncomfortable
with the attention for a few seconds but soon shows signs of
enjoyment and pride.

INT. MOVIE THEATER - NIGHT

Ben and Luke are sitting in the back row of a movie theater
separated by one seat. They each have a popcorn and soda.
The house lights are still on in the theater as previews are
playing. People are seen walking in from behind.

BEN
(exasperated)
Well, looks like another night
with a same sex date to the
movies.

15.

LUKE
Dude, how's it goin with Karen?
You put your moves on yet?

Luke realizes that he just said Karen's name, and interrupts
himself. Ben still doesn't know about Luke in the play.

BEN
(whispers)
Karen?

Ben recovers from confusion.

BEN
(Frustrated)
Yea I forgot to tell you, I never
see her. We got moved to a
completely different part of the
building.

LUKE
Ok, here's the thing...

Luke is about to inform Ben that he got the role in the
play, before he is interrupted by Ben.

BEN
God, she's so beautiful. How can
I even think about anything else
right now when I have this angel,
this goddess, this piece of
perfection...and I can't even talk
to her. I blew my only chance to
be happy. How did you know-

LUKE
(annoyed)
Look man, why don't you just try
and talk to her outside of
rehersal? See, this is what's
wrong with people our age these
days. They have a problem, no
matter how big or small it may be,
it doesn't matter. They have this
problem, and they don't do a damn
thing about it! We're a society
of these apathetic, post-barbaric,
nobodies.

BEN
(defeated)
I don't know man...hey...what were
you going to tell me earlier?

16.

Luke, obviously uncomfortable and not willing to tell Ben
anymore, squirms in his seat until the lights go down, and
the movie begins.

LUKE
Uh, nothing. Dude, you know I
can't talk during a movie. I just
can't.

Luke points to the screen.

LUKE
(whispering)
movie.

INT. MONTAGE - DAY

A montage of very short 5-8 second clips of Ben and Luke
each living their separate lives over music. The clips will
show Luke enjoying rehearsal and the cast enjoying him, Ben
being miserable at rehearsal, Ben alone at home bored, Luke
waiting around the building's corner watching Ben walk in
first, etc.

INT. CAR RIDE - DAY

The same car camera angle show Luke in the driver's seat and
Ben getting into the passenger seat. Luke pulls away from
the curb and starts to drive.

BEN
Hey Meng, thanks for giving me a
ride to rehearsal, Dude. I was
stuck. My car shit the bed.

Luke appears uneasy and nervous about this situation. He
nods, turns on the radio and continues to drive.

The sit with the music blasting for a few moments and Ben
qucikly turns it down.

BEN
Hey, where have you been lately?

Luke opens his mouth to begin to talk but is clearly uncure
of what he will say.

BEN
Because ya know, I truly believe
you don't exist when I'm not
around.

17.

LUKE
Uhhhhh

BEN
We've spent every waking second
together, hanging out, since we
were in first grade. I'm sorry,
but I have a very hard time
picturing you doing things when
I'm not around. I mean, you just
can't be real. Sometimes when you
tell me stories about something
you did, even if it's taking out
the goddamn garbage, I can't help
but think to myself "No you
didn't!"

Ben laughs to himself and his amusement is diminished when
Luke awkwardly reaches for the radio nob and turns the
volume back up, making very little eye contact with Ben.

INT. REHEARSAL BUILDING - DAY

Luke parks the car and the two boys get out. They start to
walk towards the building.

BEN
Oh, you coming in?

LUKE
Mmm, yea.

They arrive at the entrance to the building and Ben turns to
Luke in secret.

BEN
Since I'm a few minutes early, I
want to peek my head in the
rehearsal room and get a glimpse
at this golden star everyone is
talking about. The cockbag that is
more than likely winning over my
future wife as we speak.

A look of overwhelming guilt falls over Luke. He can't look
Ben in the eye and is kicking around the dirt. He opens his
mouth to talk but nothing comes out. He finally looks up at
Ben. Ben knows. He shakes his head in disbelief.

BEN
How could you do this?

18.

Ben acts mildly frantic and doesn't know quite what to say
as he blurts out sentence fragments in confusion and
disbelief. He then runs through the entrance of the building
and holds one of the four glass doors shut. Luke tries to
get in. Ben's face is very serious, regardless of his silly
gesture. Luke moves to another door and Ben runs to hold
that shut. This continues for two more doors and Ben gives
up in anger. Luke cautiously opens the door and walks in the
building.

The two boys are now in a corridor. Ben is storming away in
anger and Luke goes after him.

LUKE
Ben, comon. Let's talk this out.
It's not gonna do us any good if
you walk away.

Ben stops and turns around slowly. Luke haults in front of
him.

BEN
Are you my friend?

LUKE
Of course.

Ben swiftly punches Luke in the eye. The blow is rather soft
and makes a slapping sound on contact. Luke is startled by
the punch and taken aback for a moment but does not
retaliate or resist in any way. Ben seems a bit shocked that
he punched his friend but puts back on his pouting face and
quickly walks away. Luke stays put for a few seconds and
then walks in another direction.

INT. HALLWAY - DAY

Ben is sitting in the hallway of the rehersal building with
his head in his hands, wimpering quietly.

A janitor turns the corner pushing a mop-bucket. He stops
at Ben's feet, but Ben fails to acknowledge his presence.

JANITOR
Everything alright down there,
son?

Ben quickly looks up at the Janitor, gets to his feet and
tries to collect himself.

19.

BEN
(quietly)
Yeah, I'm fine.

JANITOR
Well, if you say so...

Ben looks at the janitor with a look of anger in his eyes.

BEN
(angrily)
Yea, well you know what I say?
(Yelling) Luke Schilgelski is a
fucking asshole! and uh...he's
dead to me...and he's
a...fucking...jerk!
I can't believe he would go behind
my back and steal her from me! She
was the goddamn love of my life,
and what does he do? He gets the
damn part. Luke "I've never done
anything worth noting in my entire
fucking life" gets my part. It
was my part...my part and my girl.

JANITOR
It seems to me that you need to
learn how to be happy for people
that aren't you. Your anger is
only a sign of your selfishness
which is a sign of your deepest
insecurities. Ask yourself, son..
Why are you so upset? Because
your best friend in the whole
world is experiencing an ounce of
success in a regional production
of a mediocre play?

BEN
(annoyed)
It's more than that...Karen...

JANITOR
Oh yes, there's always the girl.
Look son, just because this girl,
Karen was her name? Just because
Karen and your friend here are
sharing the stage... doesn't mean
they're sharing anything else.
You're too blind. Blinded by the
anger and jealousy and rage to see
anything clearly right now. Why
don't you do your friend, and
(MORE)

20.

JANITOR (cont'd)
yourself a favour and give him the
support he needs. He needs a
friend, not the enemy that you've
made yourself out to be. And the
girl...well, I'm sure that
everything will work out. It
always does, doesn't it? Now get
the hell out of here, I've got to
mop this floor before that fucking
director cmes out here and yells
at me in that fake-ass french
accent of his.
(mocking the director)
Clean ze floor! Mop ze floor!

INT. REHEARSAL ROOM - DAY

Karen is up against the wall in the rehearsal room. She is
frustrated. Luke has his arm up above her shoulder but his
head is down. The cast is seen rehearsing quietly in the
background of the shot.

LUKE
(Solemn)
I can't, not today.

The director runs into the shot and crouches down to face
Luke's drooped head.

DIRECTOR
You have to! You have been
avoiding this kissing scene all
week and we simply need to
rehearse it Mr.Star. I'm sure
you're quite the cassanova with
the ladies, but I'm afraid this is
quite different.

LUKE
(Nodding)
I know, I know. We can do it
tomorrow, I just have this lip
thing, lots of pus and blood..
chapped thing.

Karen is repulsed.

DIRECTOR
So close to opening night! This is
the most important part of the
play. Two lovers whose affection
is so forbidden it's illegal! This
(MORE)

21.

DIRECTOR (cont'd)
kiss is the culmination of a
romance between crime and law.
This kiss represents everything
that is good and evil in this
country. It must be perfect. It
must be passionate. It must be
real! Real doesn't really happen.
You have to practice real!

Luke steps away from Karen.

LUKE
Give me a break eh? I can't do
this tonight.

The director stares down Luke and shakes his head in
disappointment. He throws his clipboard and makes an
announcement to the cast. All members stop what they are
doing to listen.

DIRECTOR
We are wasting our time here. Take
the night off people.

Everyone is confused at first but don't question the
dismissal. Luke waits for everyone to leave, mopes over to
his jacket and walks out of the room.

INT. HALLWAY - DAY

Ben is walking down the hall and passes the cast rehearsal
room. Luke walks out and they share an awkward silence. They
both freeze in place and Luke slowly puts his jacket on.

BEN
I don't get it. I brought you to
the auditions for moral support.
Not to steal my career and my
woman.

Luke is thrown off by the phrasing of Ben's "woman" but
holds back any verbal reaction to it.

LUKE
You really think I did this on
purpose? It all happened so fast,
I just... I tried to tell you... I
don't know.

Luke feels guilty. His demeanor is shameful. Ben is acting
more solemn now.

22.

BEN
But fuck man, you knew I wanted
this part. Needed this part.

LUKE
I know I know I know I know.
Listen I shouldn't have kept this
form you and maybe I shouldn't
have taken the part but do you
have any idea what it's like to be
me?

BEN
You sound like you're in one of
those shitty television for
women's movies.

LUKE
No, I'm serious meng. I envy you.
You have it all. Your family
thinks you are the golden child.
Why do you think I'm over there
all the time? You are so fucking
talented it hurts. By some mere
fluke, some disalignment in the
stars you didn't get this part and
for once I could fill your shoes.
Don't you see it? You have so much
drive, so much desire. You
actually want something in life.
We always talk about these people,
ya know, like janitors and
plumbers and we wonder why. Why
they gave up every trying to be
anything. We they lost their
drive, or if they ever had the
drive to do anything with their
time on this earth. We sit there
wondering about these seemingly
pointless being and I wake up one
mornign and realize I'm one of
them. For fuck's sake man. You are
so determined, and you know
exactly what you want. So you
can't talk to girls, big deal.
Less fuckin heartache. I'd rather
have a fraction of your genuine
ambition than any of the random
floozies I've dated these past few
years. Shit, man, I'd kill to be
you, to even be on your level. And
for this past month, I felt liek
just maybe I was somebody.

23.

Ben is shocked and clearly flattered. He nods his head with
misty eyes and extends his hands for their secret hand
shake.

BEN
You have my blessing. I'm sorry I
knocked you on your ass earlier.

Ben points to Luke and they both chuckle, trying to retain
some fragment of masculinity.

A long two-shot of the boys shows them walking in separate
directions. Ben continues on his way and Luke leaves. At the
end of the hallway Luke bumps into the same janitor.

LUKE
Excuse me Sir.

Luke attempts to walk around the janitor and his trash can
but the man puts his hand on Luke's shoulder, Luke freezes
and continues to look ahead.

JANITOR
She better be worth it.

Luke turns his head now to look at the janitor. A shot of
the janitor shows his head nodding once, knowingly to Luke.
Luke continues on his way, swiftly.

INT. LIVING ROOM - DAY

Right half of the screen fades in as Ben picks up his
telephone and begins dialing. When we hear a ring, the left
half of the screen fades in to show Luke picking up his
telephone.

Luke is acting solemn throughout the entire conversation,
not like himself.

LUKE
Hello?

BEN
Hey man, how's it going?

LUKE
Oh, I'm fine I guess.

BEN
(Reluctantly)
So, tomorrow's the big night, eh?

24.

LUKE
Oh yeah, I guess it is, isn't it.

BEN
You know, I hear there are going
to be some newspaper people there,
man. Someone told me that a
reporter from the art section of
the Globe is gonna be there.

LUKE
(Guilty)
Oh yeah? That's great.

BEN
It sure is great, man. Just
think, this could be your break.
(Half Jokingly) So, you saved your
dear old friend a seat, right?

LUKE
(Smirking)
Sure did man...the best seat in
the house.

INT. STAGE - NIGHT

The auditorium is a gymnasium with folding chairs in rows
facing the stage with a walking space in between the two
groups. The lights are on and the stage is set. A panning
shot shows the entire space as patrons enter the gym,
receive their program and sit down.

Ben walks in, grabs a program, stops and takes it all in
before finding an available seat. His smile is unconvincing
and gleams of jealousy and disappointment peak through. He
looks around and finds a couple free seats near the back. He
climbs over people's legs and trips as he apologizes several
times to each person he climbs over. He sits.

Ben starts to flip through his program as a heavily-bearded
man sits beside him wearing all black and a top hat. Ben
looks up from his reading to see who made all this comotion.
The man continues to look straight ahead. Ben's attention is
directed to the stage where he sees the assistant director
waving him up. Ben looks around and lacks confidence that
she is pointing to him. He finally gets the point after a
few back and forth cuts of this charade. He walks up to the
stage and it is revealed that he was on the far left end of
the row and didn't have to climb over all those people in
the first place.

25.

INT. BACKSTAGE - NIGHT

The backstage is busy with crew members walking about with
ladders, props,lights, etc. Ben is pulled behind the curtain
by the assistant director.

BEN
What's up?

ASST. DIR
Listen, Ben, our male lead just
called. He has severe food
poisoning. He can't make the show.
You have to go on.

Ben is shocked and dazed by this news as he knows for a fact
Luke isn't sick. His open mouth reveals a smile of pure
gratitude and happiness. She starts to take his coat off and
loosen his tie.

ASST. DIR
I know you can do it, you are
amazing. You are one of the finest
actors I've ever worked with and
I've been telling everybody about
you. This is your big chance, Ben.
Are you up for it?

As Ben regains attention to the assistant director, the
director walks swiftly into the shot with his clipboard. He
is dressed very nice, almost comically feminine, for the
show.

DIRECTOR
Of course he's up for it. Your
wardrobe is the second dressing
room on the right
Mr.Hollywoodpants. Now go, go!

Ben finishes loosening his tie with a huge smile of
excitement as he runs to his dressing room. The two
directors watch him go off and nod to each other in
confidence.

Ben runs through the stage door, bumps into Karen and knocks
her over. The two tumble and land on top of each other.

BEN
Oh my God. Hi. I mean, are you
okay? I'm Ben.

Karen is looking at ben wide-eyed and tries to speak but

26.

nothing comes out. She begins to panic as Ben has no idea
his entire weight is on her body. He soon realizes this is
the cause for her distress and quickly jumps up.

BEN
I am so sorry. I just came through
the- I really wasn't watching-

A two-shot shoes Karen getting up from the ground and Ben
standing there apologizing.

BEN
Oh! Let me help you. Christ, I'm
sorry.

KAREN
(Flustered)
I'm already up, thank you.

BEN
Shit shit shit shit. I should've
helped you up. Dammit I'm an ass,
I swear. I am so sorry.

KAREN
(Giggling)
It's okay. Knowing me, I probably
would have fallen anyways. I'm the
clumsiest person I know. I'm Karen
by the way.

BEN
(Nervous)
I know. I mean, I assumed. I mean,
yes, you are. But you knew that. I
didn't. Didn't know your name, I
knew you know it though. Oh my
God.

KAREN
I hear you're replacing Luke
tonight. Do you know him?

BEN
(Solemn)
Yea, we've met. It's probably not
gonna be easy for me to fill his
shoes eh?

27.

KAREN
Well, to be completely honest with
you, he wasn't anything special.
Great guy. Just didn't have the
drive. Always seemed like he was
somewhere else, ya know?

BEN
Shit! I'm Ben by the way. Hi.

Karen extends her hand and Ben's hands are in his pocket and
once he notices hers he very swiftly and eaglerly shakes
hands with her.

KAREN
(Giggling)
Hi, Ben. I think you gave me a
minor concussion, Ben. Now is that
short for Benjamin, or is it just
Ben?

BEN
(Nervous)
Well, Benjamin, really. I mean
nobody calls me that. Unless you
want to. I preffer people not call
me that, Benjamin, not Ben. Ben is
fine. So is Benjamin. It really
depends on the person.

KAREN
(Nervous)
Yea, cute. The name I mean. What
you said- You- I'm gonna call
you Ben if that's okay.

BEN
Yea, yea. Well. I better get goin
to the dressing room.

KAREN
Okay, I guess I'll see you on
stage. Break a leg heh?

BEN
(Nervous laugh)
Oh, I didn't realize people really
said that. I mean do you really
want me to fracture a major
ligament while performing? I mean
comon- Eh? I just- Oh man. Good
luck.

28.

Ben hits his forehead in regret and walks to his dressing
room. Karen smiles and walks in the opposite direction.

INT. STAGE - NIGHT

The stage is set with minimal props and scenery to look like
the interior of a bank. Karen is stage right, behind a
counter, counting money to herself and Ben comes in from
stage left.

BEN
(Forceful)
Hold it right there Missy!

Ben pulls a gun from his shoulder holster and aims it at
Karen. Karen looks at him, chuckles to herself, sets down
the money, and walks around the counter towards the cop.

KAREN
(Sexy)
Now Lutenant, are you really gonna
blow my pretty little brains all
over this nice marble floor?

BEN
(Weakening)
You're damn right I will. I've
been chasing your scheme for
months now. I really want to
cherish this moment.

KAREN
(Flirtatious)
Oh, so do I. You with your big
strong arms and cute little hat.
You really dressed for the
occasion didn't you Mr.Officer?

Karen runs her fingers up Ben's arms which are still
extended in the original direction as he starts to fall
under her spell. She then dips under his arms and comes up
in the space between them, facing Ben.

KAREN
Well? Are ya gonna?

BEN
(Entranced)
Shoot you?

Karen closes her eyes and tilts her head and Ben soon

29.

follows her as the two engage in a romantic kiss. Ben drops
his gun behind her and the two hold each other tight and
kiss passionately.

A backstage shot shows the director looking on from
offstage. He stands with the assistant director.

DIRECTOR
That is a bit longer than we
rehearsed, but I like it heh? That
is real!

The shot returns to the stage kiss. The audience starts
clapping and the kiss continues as the lights dim.

A dissolve transition represents the passage of time between
the play and clean up. The crowd has left and only one
patron remains in his seat, the mysterious bearded man. Crew
members are doing busywork aroudn the stage area, sweeping,
etc. Ben comes out from the curtain and excitedly scurries
down the steps. With a satisfied smile on his face, ben
walks up to the bearded man.

BEN
Thank you, friend.

Luke (bearded man) smiles. The two exchange their secret
handshake.

BEN
See you at McShane's for the
afterparty?

LUKE
No you go ahead. Have your night.

Ben smiles and continues on his way.

A few moments pass and then Karen comes out from backstage.
She is walking intently towards the exit and stops
unexpectedly at the beginning of Luke's row.

KAREN
Thanks Luke.

Karen smiles and continues on her way. She is gitty with
excitement.

Luke turns back to face the stage with a satisfied grin. He
folds his arms in pride. After a few seconds pass, the
janitor sits next to him. He is relieved to relax and still
has a broom in hand. Luke turns to him in confusion.

30.

JANITOR
You done good. It took you a while
to realize it, but you found your
place. It takes a real friend to
do what you did here tonight. Son,
do you know what happens when a
farmer takes a calf to slaughter?

Luke's mouth is partially open in awe of this situation. He
is utterly confused and can only respond with a subtle shake
of his head.

JANITOR
His friends cry. They cry for
hours. You wonder what your place
in life is. Well, it's so simple
to those around you. You're a
friend. People are not defined by
their occupation or their
educational background or who
their family is. They are defined
by themselves. Everyday you make a
choice that significantly
contributes to who you are as a
human being. Some make choices
that will help them get a better
job, or a better role in a play.
You, you make the choice to be a
friend. You are a friend to those
around. Kind to your fellow man.
Consider yourself a modern day
Jesus. Do you like Jesus, Son?

Luke nods his head with wide-eyes. The janitor chuckles to
himself.

JANITOR
You're a caring man. Selfless when
it counts the most. It's so easy
to see what your role is in this
world. Why anyone could tell you.
Your heart is bigger than you
know. It's all that matters these
days. Shit, people hate each
other. Ever been to the city?
Dang, can't even get a god damn
hot dog without someone tellin me
to go fuck myself. And you, you're
the answer. Kindness. Compassion.
Friendship. Shit, you're so
worried about figuring your whole
life out that you don't even
realize you're one of the only
(MORE)

31.

JANITOR (cont'd)
peopls that has. Fuck jobs. Fuck
school. Fuck money. Fuck fame.
This is real. This is life. And
you have got it by the balls my
friend.

LUKE
But, it wasn't a big deal, I just-

The janitor puts his hand up and closes his eyes to shush
Luke.

JANITOR
(Snappy)
Kind sir, do not ruin this moment.
You've got one hell of a journey
ahead of you my man.

The old man gets up and gathers his things. he bends down a
bit to face Luke.

JANITOR
Now if I ever see you sellin hot
dogs in the city, you damn best
believe I'm buyin one from you.

The janitor wheels his cart out the gym doors and Luke sits,
looking ahead in contemplation.

FADE OUT.

Feedback

From John Keller	Date 2/19/2006
This screenplay is one of the most marketable of the ones I've read on here. I think it has the potential to be stretched into a feature for sure and I encourage the writers to do that. You definitely have something here and you should go with it. This is a film for the masses, but it has unique ideas and if shot well can be an amazing piece of work.

From Nicholas	Date 2/1/2006
AMAAAAZING! Love love love love it, can't wait to see the final version. Keep up the good work!

From Jack Daniels	Date 1/28/2006	0 stars
Don't see the appeal.

From Tom Pepper	Date 1/28/2006
Not a bad story but leave the direction and most details to the director.

From Riptide Studios	Date 1/27/2006
Excellent script, overall. You have a gift for dialogue, it has a true feel to it. I particularly like the scene where Ben and Karen meet. What I'd like to see is a little more expansion. Expand your scenes, just a little! Throw in some more witty repartee and you'll have a blockbuster! I'd like to see interaction from another character, some of the scenes where Karen is discussed at great length get stale. Good job, keep it up.

From Jesse Pinho	Date 1/23/2006
I LOVE THIS SCRIPT. It makes some excellent points, but is still funny when it needs to be. A+ and I'm looking forward to seeing more of your work.

Leave Feedback

You must be logged in to leave feedback.

Home My Account Products Screenwriter Community Screenwriter's Corner Help